riverviewlogs | [open] i can't forget it

I'm so glad the two of you are getting to know each other so well.

[It's said with an equal amount of fondness and a little twist of amusement, a gentle tease to try to help ease some of Cisco's tension. Eddie knows his jokes aren't good, but Cisco seems to appreciate that he's trying, seems to think his attempts are cute. Besides, what Cisco said about Yuri is absolutely true, and it's kind of cute in its own way.

The smile fades a little bit as Cisco comes over to him and avoids eye contact, as he reaches over to hug Eddie's arm and then lean his face into his shoulder. Eddie can tell, from his body language, his lack of eye contact or willingness to look at Eddie, from the way he holds his shoulders and touches Eddie and hides against him, that Cisco is afraid. And Eddie doesn't blame him. After all, this is slightly dangerous ground they're treading on.

But Eddie is determined to help Cisco, to help him feel safe and to make sure he's okay through all this. When Cisco kisses his shoulder and then squeezes his hand, it only makes that feeling stronger, draws it from a want to a need.

Eddie takes a deep breath, his eyes stinging a little because of the sheer amount of emotion that's built up in the base of his ribcage, and smiles at Cisco.]

Alright.

[A pause, and then Eddie's leading the way up the stairs, holding the door for Cisco and looking around the room admiringly.]

Looks nice, very relaxing. Do you want me to lock the door?

[ At the very least, Cisco tells himself, Magnus had put in that soundproofing in his room. Not as extensive as he'd imagined, when first he had moved in, but enough that their neighbors aren't likely to call the police if he starts screaming bloody murder.

Cisco sets the brownies on his desk, surveying the room for any last dangers or things that need fixed, but there are none. No reasons to delay any longer. ]

Naw, just close it's fine.

[ Cisco plucks up a square of the brownies, pads over to the bed and flops down backwards on it, hard enough to make the mattress squeak a little under his weight. He heaves a big sigh, says: ]

Well, here goes.

[ He takes his first bite, chewing meditatively. Cisco really can't bear to think about everything that could go wrong, so he just starts talking, anything to fill the silence and distract his mind: ]

Hmmm. Not really sure the sprinkles are working, texture wise. I thought it was a really good idea so I could tell the batches apart but it's like... mmm. Not that good. Oh well. Now I know for next time. If there's a next time.

[ Another bite, because in for a penny, in for a pound. He's still feeling high-strung, tries to force himself to relax. He thinks about those exercises that Sam had talked to him about, focusing on different muscles individually and tensing then untensing them. Cisco has only just started doing that when there is a buzzer. For a second he doesn't know what it is, sits up rapidly, but then- ]

Shit, right. The dryer, my blankets. Do you mind...?

[At Cisco's request, Eddie just closes the door behind them as Cisco surveys the room for anything that might make this more difficult or scary, then heads over to the bed with a brownie. After throwing himself down on it, chewing thoughtfully, Cisco starts talking about the sprinkles, and Eddie knows him well enough to know that he's probably afraid, now. That he's nervous, compensating by talking a lot, about things that aren't important, aren't related to the thing he's afraid of.

But right now, Eddie's not in any rush to make him get back on task.]

Maybe if there's a next time, we can get those green mint chocolate chips, you know the ones? Sprinkle those in.

[The anxiety and high tension and Cisco's obvious attempts to force himself to relax are a little concerning for Eddie, though, and he purses his lips, looking down at him for a moment. If there's nothing else Eddie knows about taking drugs, it's that the mood a person is in going into it has a major effect on the way the drug works in the system, and Eddie's worried about Cisco going into this so nervous.

When the buzzer goes and Cisco asks if he'd mind grabbing the blankets, Eddie nods, thoughtful.]

Yeah. Hold off on eating more till I get back, okay? I have a couple ideas.

[Heading down the stairs, Eddie quickly opens the dryer, but pauses when he hears a slight rattling noise. Furrowing his brows, he shifts and gives the door another little wiggle to see if the rattle happens again, and follows the sound when it does. A little finagling, and he sees a faintly glowing star shape in the shadows behind the dryer. For a moment, he stares at it with a little smile on his face, then he leans over, pulls it out, and gathers up Cisco's blankets, heading back up the stairs.

Unceremoniously, he dumps them on the end of the bed, dryer-warm and smelling faintly of fabric softener, and smiles at Cisco, expression bright.]

Hey, guess what I found.

[ Cisco gives a thumbs up, his promise not to eat any more until Eddie returned. The promise of Eddie's ideas is intriguing enough to distract Cisco from his anxiety for a little while. It gives him something to do that isn't obsessing about his body and looking for the first signs of a high, even though he knows it'll be some time before the brownies kick in.

When Eddie returns, he drops the blankets, and Cisco immediately gets up, wrapping himself efficiently into a blanket burrito before laying back down again. ]

I don't know... stray sock?

[ Not a bad guess, statistically speaking, for something Eddie might have found in the laundry room. But as soon as he makes that (apparently, incorrect) guess, Eddie is showing him what the thing really is, and... oh. ]

Oh.

[ Mutely, Cisco reaches out for that star. He'd forgotten about it, that it must be somewhere in the room. He sits up, the blanket draped over his back and shoulders, and looks down at it in his hands. Cisco's voice is a touch distracted and distant as he explains: ]

It's the one from the blackout. It- when I was washing the sheets that morning, it fell out, and I... threw it back behind the machine.

[When Cisco guesses stray sock, Eddie laughs a little and then produces the star from in his hand. It sits on his palm until Cisco says 'oh' in that small voice and then holds his hand for it. Crossing the room, Eddie sits down with his blanket burrito boyfriend and hands the star over, smiling a bit while Cisco explains why the star was where it was.]

Well, I guess it must've rattled its way to somewhere I could see it, and pull it back out.

[Lifting his chin, Eddie's eyes connect with Cisco's, and he reaches out to stroke fingers through Cisco's beautiful long hair, pushing it back from his cheek and jaw.]

We've come a long way since then, haven't we? I remember waking up next to you that morning. You looked so beautiful, naked in my bed with the sunshine all warm and golden on your skin. You were really peaceful too, I could've sat there and watched you for hours. I should have. But I was afraid of hurting you, when all you deserve is the best life has to offer.

[Eddie gently brushes his thumb against Cisco's lower lip, smiling a bit at him.]

Imagine that, keep that picture in your head. Waking up naked in my bed with the sun playing across your skin, warm and wrapped in blankets, and me there, watching you sleep. Smiling at you when you open your eyes, reaching out to tuck your hair away from your cheek. Try to hold onto that feeling while you go into this, okay? That feeling of being cared for, warm and wanted. Of someone looking at you and thinking you're amazing.

[ Cisco looks at Eddie, surprised at how raw he is feeling right then - that a little piece of plastic could bring to the surface all kinds of old insecurities and shame that he had thought he had entirely purged himself of, by now. After all, he and Eddie are together. It had taken a while, and there had been awkwardness and tears, but eventually, they understood one another. So there's no reason that that little star ought to make him feel like an exposed nerve.

But it does. At least, until Eddie is looking straight at him like that, in that way that holds Cisco's own gaze, keeps him from looking away. Eddie's hand in his hair is so soft, and Cisco leans into the contact, the way he does in particular when he doesn't want Eddie to stop touching him. ]

We have.

[ Cisco exhales, closing his eyes and nodding slightly. He does as Eddie says, tries to picture waking up in Eddie's bed, next to him. Easy enough, since he's done it a few times, now. And it's easier, imagining that sunlit Eddie touching his face, when he can feel Eddie's actual hand against his skin. Cisco murmurs: ]

Okay. I like this version.

[ He opens his eyes, and his room is much darker than the room he'd been picturing just now. But Eddie is there, and smiling, those little creases around his eyes still visible even in the dimness. Cisco clutches that plastic heart close over his chest. He wants to keep holding onto it, but he reluctantly holds it out to Eddie. ]

Hold onto it for me? For today? Please? I don't wanna... lose it, or anything. And you can give it back to me after.

[ It's just a cheap, plastic, glow-in-the-dark star, but it's a memento, too. A little reminder of the first night they'd kissed. Cisco wants to keep it. Maybe that makes him silly and sentimental, but he doesn't care.

Once he's handed it over, Cisco makes himself properly comfortable on the bed. He shuts his eyes again, feeling quite comfortable in his blanket armor. ]

Be a lot easily to hold onto that feeling if you spoon me a little. And keep talking. I really like the sound of your voice. I think... I think that might be the first thing I found attractive about you.

[ Sure, Cisco had noticed the white teeth and the nice suits and the muscles and the good hair. Hard not to notice. But all those things had been generically handsome - enough to make Eddie intimidating, but not to necessarily make Cisco's stomach go fluttery. Instead, it was some quality to Eddie's voice - a softness and carefulness that didn't quite suit the way he he looked. It was incongruous, and, upon reflection, lovely. ]

[The expression on Cisco's face, soft and warm and vulnerable, makes Eddie's heart melt a little, and when Cisco opens his eyes after a moment, looking up at him with those dark eyes, full of something fragile and good, Eddie feels just a little choked up again. Leaning in, he presses a soft kiss against Cisco's mouth, and then his forehead, strokes back Cisco's hair while his boyfriend holds it close against his chest.

After a moment, when Cisco holds the star out to him and asks him to hang onto it, Eddie smiles and nods, takes it, and slides it into the pocket of his sweats. When Cisco asks Eddie to spoon him, Eddie nods, grabs the pan of brownies after making sure it's cool enough to touch, and puts it in reach of the bed in case Cisco needs more to feel a high. So they don't have to move, so he doesn't have to separate from Cisco when he's feeling vulnerable like this, and still a bit nervous. Eddie slides into the bed behind Cisco, curling up against his back and circling his arm around Cisco's waist. Burying his face into the back of Cisco's neck, he inhales the scent of Cisco's hair as the younger man asks him if he can keep talking, mentions that he was attracted to his voice, first.]

That's...not what I would've thought, actually. I've never really thought of my voice as anything special. It's just a voice.

[After a moment, he smiles a bit, and tilts his head forward.]

I think I was attracted to your hair and your eyes first. Your hair is just...well, it's gorgeous. I keep having to hold back from touching it as much as I want to, which is basically all the time. And your eyes...there's just something about the way they look when you're smiling and all full of energy. Like you're made of sunshine and life, like you're excitement and passion personified. I'm really drawn to that about you. It's not annoying or boring like you're always saying it is, it's really, really attractive.

It's not just a voice, to me. It's your voice. And I like it.

[ He likes, in particular, listening to the calming flow of it as Eddie talks what he was drawn to in Cisco. The hair thing doesn't surprise him, really. He'd realized that Eddie was into long hair early on, when he listed it as one of the reasons Taako had caught his eye. And Iris had always had such beautiful hair, too. So it made sense.

What he says about Cisco's eyes, though, makes something in his chest feel tight. Less for the praise itself - though part of it is that - and more because it makes it clear how Eddie sees him. Is that the person Eddie thinks he is, and perceives him as? Someone made of sunshine? Someone full of passion and life? Because Eddie is right - most of the time when he gets carried away on tangents, breathless with excitement, he just assumes that anyone near him is at best tolerating his loudness, his lack of decorum and moderation. But right now, Eddie is talking like it's not a burden - like he actually likes that, about Cisco.

He pulls Eddie's arm up, moving it from his waist to wrap tightly across his chest, so Cisco can hold onto it and hug it tightly. ]

I really like... when you smile, you just light up, and you get all these adorable crinkles around your eyes. Even before I realized I was into you, I used to feel so happy any time I made you smile or laugh enough that you'd get them.

I like yours too, you know.

[His voice is soft, and he nuzzles into Cisco's hair again, lifts his head enough to press a kiss against Cisco's earlobe, then to trail a few more around the shell of it. Cisco's hands move, then, tugging Eddie's arm up further and across his chest instead of his waist, and Eddie moves with him, making a soft hum as he plops back into the soft mattress and nudges himself up a little closer to Cisco's back.

Cisco's compliments catch him slightly off-guard, and he manages a bashful laugh, burying his face into the back of Cisco's neck and shaking his head.]

Oh come on, you like my laugh wrinkles? [A pause, and then, quietly.] I mean, I guess I'm glad that as I get older, those are the wrinkles I get. Smile lines are way better than stress lines. So fine, I'll give you that, Cisco Ramon.

[A pause, and then he carries on.]

Seriously, though, you make me laugh more than anyone else I've ever been with. You're always doing it, I'm happy most of the time when I'm with you. And I love your smile too. It's so...bright. Sorry. I know I keep saying that, it's just that you're so warm, you know?

[ Cisco giggles with delight at that; he can't think of anything he'd rather have on his list of accomplishments than making Eddie happy most of the time. It's easier to believe than some of Eddie's other compliments, because he's seen it. Has seen how much time Eddie spends laughing and smiling when he's there. It's easy sometimes, to just dismiss all that as Eddie being a generally genial and smiley sort of guy. But Cisco knows there is more to him than that.

He keeps on giggling, and giggling. For some reason, it all just seems very amusing to him. The two of them. How happy they make each other. How strong and warm and wonderful Eddie's arm around his chest is. The solidity of Eddie pressed against his back, and the little breaths he can feel on the back of his neck. His heart is beating fast, even though he's just been laying there not moving, and Cisco figures it out. He announces: ]

Oh. I think... it's kicking in.

[ He expects a surge of fear or nervousness, at that realization, but none comes. Why had he been so worried? He had been so worried about this, and it's all just fine. That thought makes Cisco giggle again, bringing a hand up to cover his mouth as he does. ]

[Eddie sees it clear as day even before Cisco can say a single word that the pot is kicking in, because Cisco is giggling more than the joke really called for, laughing softly and shaking a bit against Eddie. Eddie squeezes him, smiling against his hair and nodding.]

I think it's kicking in too. You sound happy.

[Shifting, Eddie leans up to look over Cisco's shoulder and try to see his face, his mouth curved into a warm smile.]

Sorry. I just knew that giggle must come with one of those sunshine smiles I like so much. I had to see it.

[ When Cisco feels the bed shift under Eddie's weight, notices him peering over, he moves without thinking. Much easier for Eddie to see him smiling if he lays on his back, and besides, it feels nice. He rolls over and just lays there, eyes closed, grinning wide. ]

Sunshine?

[ Right now, for once, he isn't overanalyzing whether he can compare to something as bright and good as sunshine. He's just enjoying the feel of the word, and thinking about how it feels to lay in sunshine, and that's really all he needs. Cisco's brain is usually so full, a dozen rushing thoughts at the same moment, all interweaving and competing with one another. But right now, just the word sunshine is entertainment enough to pour all his focus into it. ]

I wonder how my dopamine's doing.

[ Even though his heart is beating fast, and he can definitely feel some other effects settling in, Cisco doesn't feel anything like he does just before a vibe is about to happen. ]

Yes. Sunshine.

[Eddie looks down at Cisco as the younger man rolls onto his back and looks up at him, grinning at him warm and sweet, his eyes bright and his mouth wide and slightly crooked and it's so genuine and heartwarming Eddie can't help but beam back at him. Cisco lies on the bed looking up at him and smiling and talking about sunshine and laughing, his face bright and mouth curved into a smile as he laughs softly. Eddie lifts a hand and strokes back Cisco's hair, traces fingers lightly over his face, enjoying the reactions as he does, enjoying the shapes of Cisco's face under his fingertips.]

I have no idea how your dopamine's doing. How do you hope your dopamine's doing?

[Eddie smiles down at him, still, keeping his eyes on his face, brushing his thumb against his lips.]

And how can I help you get there? I can offer a wide variety of things. You know. Kisses. Tickling. Cuddles. Um....whatever else might help. Sorry. I'm not really great at this science thing.

Edited 2017-09-20 03:16 (UTC)

I hope my dopamine is really lowwwww.

[ Cisco draws out that last word, having fun with it. He opens his eyes and sees Eddie beaming down at him, expression so gentle and fond. He closes his eyes again at once, completely trusting even with Eddie looming over him like that, while he is impaired. Cisco knows that he is impaired and is distantly aware that that ought to be worrying him. But it doesn't, because Eddie's here. If anything goes bad, Eddie will take care of it. ]

Except that's not good, either. I want it to be dopamine that... I want my brain to look at the dopamine it's got and say, "Dopamine! That's dope! Time to be happy!" 'n not, "Dopamine! Everything's bad and you're gonna die!"

[ Which isn't really all that funny, but it's enough to set Cisco giggling again. His poor, flighty, confused brain. Taking everything the wrong way. He is about to say something to that effect but then Eddie's thumb against his lips distracts him. Cisco purses his lips to kiss it, then considers the options Eddie had laid out. ]

Tickling's a no. Wanna avoid... shit, what's it called? The one when you're excited. Horror movies and roller coasters. Anyway I vote kisses. Kisses please.

[Eddie keeps looking down at Cisco, touching his hair, his mouth, while Cisco closes his eyes and tilts his face up toward Eddie. It's nice, to see that trust, to be the one that Cisco wants to protect him while he's vulnerable like this. So Eddie's quiet while Cisco explains what he wants from his dopamine - first low, and then for his body to just interpret it in the right way. Eddie doesn't know a lot about biology, but he's vaguely aware that dopamine is supposed to be what people enjoy when they're having sex or eating good food. He hadn't known it was something that people got when they thought they were going to die, he'd always thought that was...]

Adrenaline. You mean adrenaline. I thought dopamine was the good one, do you mean it can be good or bad?

[A pause, and then he laughs.]

Probably not the smartest questions to ask while you're high, but...

[Tilting his head a bit, he smiles when Cisco says he votes kisses, and then leans down. But instead of kissing Cisco's mouth, he kisses his cheek, his nose, kisses his chin and jaw and his forehead, brushing the soft kisses all over his face, teasing gently with his mouth while he leans over Cisco, before moving to his mouth and kissing his lower lip.]

Mmm, you're so cute right now.

Adrenaline... yeah, that's definitely it.

[ It takes a moment or two for Cisco's brain to parse Eddie's question, after that. Judging by Eddie's laugh, the expression on his face must be just as confused as he feels. A part of him knows it ought to be easy to explain, but he just feels kind of stupid right now. Stupid, and happy, and definitely not capable of talking about neurotransmitters in any kind of coherent way. Still, he thinks he can get the point across. ]

Depends on the brain. Most people it's good. Dopamine's just, um.

[ He traces a shape into the air, a long vertical slash and then a point underneath it, frowning for a moment. ]

It's an exclamation mark. So you get it with some drugs and with blowjobs and whatever, but part of why PTSD is PTSD is your brain's dopamine gets all whack. It goes the wrong way and everything seems like a bad exclamation mark, even when you just see someone with the wrong kinda blue eyes or somebody calls you clever.

[ Cisco is neither as coherent nor as discreet as he would normally be. He is, however, perfectly happy to set aside that conversation and dissolve into helpless giggles when Eddie starts kissing all over his face. There's something even more unrestrained and childish and giggly about his laughing than usual; he crinkles up his nose and just laughs. Then Eddie is kissing his lower lip and Cisco is lifting his head into the kiss, eyes slipping shut. ]

You're really good at kissing.

[Eddie lies still, looking down at Cisco while he squirms in the bed and looks up at him and smiles in that sort of slow, happy way that people smile when they're high and content and feel safe. It's nice, to know that Cisco feels that way right now - happy and high and safe and comfortable on the bed.

Watching while Cisco explains the dopamine thing - manages to explain it despite being slow and high - Eddie smiles a bit, nodding as the explanation sinks in and starts to make sense and he makes a hum in his throat. The last part, about PTSD, that's not good, and it stings a little when Cisco says that someone with the wrong kind of blue eyes or being called clever can make him react badly, with fear instead of pleasure, screw up his dopamine.

Eddie doesn't know what to say about it, though, doesn't know how to soothe that away, and so he just kisses Cisco again, keeps fingers in his hair, and when Cisco laughs and kisses back and says he's good at it, Eddie smiles.]

You know, if you're ever scared, if your dopamine's messed up, if you're feeling alone and afraid, you can call me. I'll be here. I'll protect you, as best as I can. I'll help you feel as safe as you can.

[ At Eddie's offer of protection, Cisco closes his eyes, relaxing back against the bed and letting out a long sigh of contentment. He murmurs: ]

My hero.

[ If Cisco were thinking clearer, he would know to say something different. That the words might have some rather unpleasant associations, for Eddie. But right now, it's how he feels. That Eddie is a hero looking out for him, protecting him when he needs it, making sure he's okay. And Cisco's not thinking about what Eddie said as he was dying, or about Eddie being dead at all.

Instead, he's thinking... ]

I wanna make you a suit. [ Cisco looks around the room, wishing he had cloth and needle and thread so he can start right here and now. When he doesn't see any, his eyes land instead on a pad of blank paper and some good pencils. Cisco rolls off the bed to them, lazy and slow, pausing on his way to pick up a giant handful of the candy he'd left himself to snack on. He comes back to the bed and dumps the candy directly onto the blanket, sitting cross-legged and looking over at Eddie, saying: ]

I'm gonna design it. Right now.

[ And without further ado, the pencil starts moving as he is sketching out the basics of a human shape. ]

Edited 2017-09-25 03:34 (UTC)

[Somehow when Cisco rests back against the bed and breathes out, eyes closed, expression trusting, that Eddie is his hero, it doesn't trigger bad memories, doesn't make Eddie think of painful times. The words might be similar to the ones Iris said, that he said, when he died, but this isn't like that situation, not even a little.

He was dying, then, his heart failing, he was bleeding out, cold and alone despite the people that were there beside him. This is different, this is somewhere warm and comfortable, Eddie and Cisco are safe, Cisco is showing overt trust in him. He'd just offered protection, and Cisco had responded by calling him a hero, and that still makes Eddie's heart beat hard, makes his breath speed up, makes it so he can't help but grin like a complete idiot.]

I like the sound of that. Being your hero.

[The part about the suit makes Eddie's brows shoot up, though, and as Cisco sits up and grabs candy and paper and pencils, sits down and starts sketching out the shape of a person onto which he can draw a suit. Eddie blinks a bit, then laughs, shaking his head.]

I don't know if I deserve a suit. I'm not The Flash or anything.

Hey, uh-uh. Shhhh.

[ Cisco leans toward, presses a finger to Eddie's lips to shush him before he's even done saying the word anything. He meets Eddie's gaze, but the intended gravity of the gesture is somewhat undercut by the fact that Cisco's eyes are getting a bit bloodshot and by the way he takes significantly longer between shushing Eddie and actually thinking of what he wants to say to him. ]

You're awesome and badass. You get an awesome and badass suit. That's how it works. Trust me, I'm a professional.

[ And then he draws his hand away, using it to brace the pad of paper as he adds a broad half-circle inside the plain oval that is the head, a kind of rudimentary smile, and then labels the whole thing 'EDDIE AKA MY BOYFRIEND AKA COBALT BLUE'. Then he lifts his head and just stares at Eddie, squinting and picturing different colors, different cuts of suits, what might be comfortable and flattering on his frame. He doesn't hesitate long, pausing only to stick a red vine between his teeth and start chewing on it vaguely as he works.

He pauses after a few minutes, contemplating different styles of boots. Cisco has almost entirely forgotten why he had gotten high - that this is supposed to be an experiment and he ought to be worrying about his powers and any number of things. Instead he's allowed himself to get completely, single-mindedly wrapped up in this task. He pulls the half-eaten candy from his mouth so he can say: ]

I think really dark blue with white as an accent. You need two colors or it looks flat. I didn't do enough yellow on Barry's. I'm gonna make sure I do enough contrast on yours to make it look dope as hell.

[Eddie manages a soft laugh when Cisco reaches out to press fingers to his mouth and shush him, shaking his head a bit, eyes bright. Cisco is so cute like this, a little delayed, vulnerable, a little out of his mind - it's obvious that there isn't much anxiety in him anymore, that he's relaxed and a bit calmer.]

I don't know about awesome and badass, but I'm not going to say no to a suit. Or to you being a professional.

[Eddie watches as Cisco continues to sketch out a suit, squinting at the drawing while he chews on a red vine, engrossed and pleased and wrapped up in the task, and he can't help but keep smiling. Cisco chatters about his choices in colour, blue and white and how he's going to make sure it doesn't look flat, that it looks better than Barry's. He can't help but be a little pleased about that, about the fact that Cisco wants to make his costume better than Barry's. Can't help but be a little pleased that someone considers him worth the same as Barry, let alone more.]

Yeah? Are you gonna put on racing stripes and contour contrast so my butt looks decent?

Edited 2017-09-27 06:22 (UTC)

Eddie.

[ Cisco sets aside the sketch, and pencil, and perches the half a red vine on it so he can reach over and grab both of Eddie's hands, holding them tightly as he fights back giggles over what he's about to say. ]

Eddie, did you know. The Flash suit. I had to - I had to put. Padding On the... y'know. Rear bumper.

[ And then Cisco dissolves into uncontrollable giggles, sprawling on the bed and somehow ending with his head in Eddie's lap, just laughing and laughing. He wipes tears from the corners of his eyes and explains, loud and enthusiastic: ]

I was worried people were gonna recognize his tragic lack of butt! It's like... negative butt! And the suit just looked bad-!

[ Cisco reaches around, picks up that candy and scarfs the rest of it down, still chewing as he reassures. ]

You don't need padding. You got a great butt. I'll make sure the suit makes you look so good, don't worry. I want you to look wicked hot in it, so you're gonna.

[Seeing Cisco like this is, perhaps, one of the most endearing things that Eddie has ever experienced, and when Cisco puts down the sketch, pencil, and his candy to take Eddie's hands and squeeze them while looking at Eddie with this sense of giggly gravity that feels almost contagious. Lifting his brows, Eddie waits until Cisco is done, then there is a long, pregnant pause before he bursts out laughing. His own laughter is just as bright and enthusiastic as Cisco's, and when the younger man rolls over onto the bed and rests his head on Eddie's lap, Eddie smiles brightly down at him, lifting a hand to stroke back Cisco's hair while he picks up his candy again, chewing at it and continuing to chatter.]

Oh my god, really? You had to pad his butt so people wouldn't recognize him?

[Eddie laughs a bit more, his fingers digging into Cisco's hair affectionately.]

I guess, now that you mention it, I might recognize it if it weren't padded. It does sorta go in when it should go out. Like...like an inverse butt? An innie instead of an outtie?

[It's mean, and Eddie knows it, but Cisco started it, and it's fun, poking gentle fun at a mutual friend. Deep down, Eddie knows that part of it is from his own place of insecurity, that he's still a little jealous of Barry and what Barry had meant to Iris. A little threatened by that too. And he knows how much Cisco loved Barry, so maybe it's a little nice, a little bit of an ego boost, to have Cisco lying in his lap looking up at him like that and assuring him that he has a great butt, that he wants him to look wicked hot in it.

Grinning a little, Eddie gently pokes Cisco in the nose.]

I see. I don't suppose you have any ulterior motives for me to look wicked hot in my costume, huh?

[ The joke might be a little mean, but it's not inaccurate; Cisco laughs way too hard at it, for way too long, rolling from side to side and wheezily echoing: ]

...Inverse...butt...!

[ Eventually his giggles die down and Cisco stills, wiping tears from the corners of his eyes. He almost breaks into giggles again when Eddie pokes the tip of his nose like that. Then Eddie asks if he has ulterior motives, and Cisco tries to waggle his eyebrows, but evidently he's too high to remember quite how to do that, so he just says: ]

Very ulterior. Much motives.

[ Why is he like this. ]

I'm totally not making you a costume for sexy stuff, I'm making it 'cause you're a hero and heroes get costumes, but I'm not gonna lie if you don't want- I mean if you don't not want- wait. [ He gets tangled in the double negatives, gives up, tries again: ] But costumes are hot. And you're like super hot. I've made a whole lotta costumes for people I'm not into like that, so lemme just enjoy this one, okay?

[ And he rolls over onto his stomach and off Eddie's lap, pulling that sketchpad over and getting back to sketching, but not before adding a label with an arrow pointing to the general butt region that says 'AMAZING' ]

[Eddie can't help the slightly wicked little grin he wears while Cisco rolls around on the bed laughing and repeating the mean little joke over again, cackling away, until he's left gasping for breath and wiping tears from his eyes. Eddie shakes his head fondly, especially at that attempted eyebrow waggle (more like a twitch, really) at Cisco's ulterior motives comment, and everything that comes after.]

Oh, don't worry, I want. I've always kind of liked the whole, you know, roleplaying thing. So if you wanted, I could totally be down for like...saving you from getting mugged in an alley and...you know...

[Eddie flushes, and then lets out an abrupt, startled laugh when Cisco writes 'amazing' in relation to his butt on the drawing.]

Come on, that's going too far, it is not amazing. Goofball.

[His voice is fond and warm and he reaches out to stroke back a bit of Cisco's hair.]

So what other special features is it gonna have?

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