lucretia ♡ (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
scholiast) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
riverviewlogs2017-10-11 11:28 am
scholiast) wrote in riverviewlogs2017-10-11 11:28 am
(open) like i was never there
who: lucretia & you!
what: october memory share event
when: 9/10 to 23/10
where: all over
warnings: n/a yet, will update if things get intense
OPEN MEMORIES:
(these memories are all open for anybody to experience! if you'd like them to be shared flick me a message/just reply and we can sort it all out as we go haha. also feel free to text lucretia to let her know you saw one of her memories if u like and we can do it that way too :-) basically i am down for whatever way you wanna interpret these! if you'd like a specific memory or something a little more personal on lucretia's end feel free to hit me up on plurk at blisters and we can sort something out! ♡ )
#1 - beyond the oceansize, i'm unaware (first or third person: happy, relaxed)
(This memory starts out with the bright sun, high in the sky, and slowly unfolds to reveal a tropical scene set out before the viewer, complete with crystal clear ocean, and white, sandy beaches. This is the first Captain Davenport appointed mental health year Lucretia and her crew experienced, after they were quick to capture the light of creation within a day or so of arriving on this world. They were able to write the rest of this cycle off and spend it relaxing by the beach, cooking for each other, swimming, taking time off from fighting off the apocalypse.
During this particular memory, Lucretia is sitting out on the sands, wearing a big floppy sunhat and sandals. She still has her bathing suit on underneath her shorts, as she's been alternating between swimming and sunbathing all day, and generally having a really good time; now, she's got a big sketchpad propped in her lap, and she's sketching with large, loose gestures, just laying down the base of what is later going to be an elaborate portrait.
The memory meanders along, but follows her careful completion of the painting: when it's done, the portrait sits propped on an easel in her quarters, a dedication to the members of the IPRE. Lucretia's family. She is in the middle, holding her book and slightly hunched. Magnus has his arm about her, a broad grin on his face; Davenport, their Captain, is in the front, looking proud and impressive in his tailored jacket. Lup and Taako are arm in arm, and Lup has her other arm flung around Barry's neck, pulling him in close. Merle looks like he's in mid-laugh, turned to face the twins. They're all in their red robed uniforms, but everybody looks so happy, so relaxed.)
#2 - as we stood tall together: first person (proud, nostalgic)
(The second memory is from a much later cycle, no less important than the first. It takes place at the Legato Conservatory, during the ceremony wherein students of the Conservatory submit various works to the Light of Creation in the hopes they will be accepted so they may be granted access to the mysterious caves grouped about the mountain. The criteria for works selected isn't entirely clear, because, unbeknownst to Lucretia and the rest of the Star Blaster crew, the submissions are reviewed and consumed by Voidfish living in the caves. If the submissions are accepted, the Voidfish choose to broadcast those works to the world at large and everybody in it. The submissions, in this way, become immortalised amongst the people who live there. If the Voidfish does not like the submission, it is erased from memory as if it never existed in the first place, so there's a bit of pressure riding on the whole situation.
Lucretia has just submitted a painting to be reviewed: a detailed depiction of a famous city market square from her hometown. Despite having not seen it in fifty years, the painting is remarkably detailed, lovingly so, and even though she's nervous about presenting it to the Light of Creation, it's clear that she's really proud of the work that she's done.
This memory is tinged with a sad sense of nostalgia for her long gone home planet, though it is swiftly replaced with overwhelming pride and excitement when the Voidfish accepts her work, and promptly broadcasts the painting into the minds of everybody on the planet.)
#3 - oh my friends, i am heavy (third person: anxious, uncertain)
(The final memory is of a different nature entirely.
This memory details Lucretia sitting cross-legged on the floor of her quarters on the Star Blaster and she is surrounded by books. Countless journals lie open on the floor and she is sifting through them with shaking hands, a fresh journal propped open on her lap. She has a quill in her left hand and every so often she pauses to scratch out a new line in accordance with something she's just read.
She is compiling every scrap of information into a final journal, one that she will eventually feed to the ship's Voidfish, causing her crew members to forget everything that had happened to them over the last one hundred years. Picking what to keep and what to erase is difficult. There are a lot of memories to sift through, and not all of them are good. Sometimes she has to pause to collect herself; other times she stops writing so she can laugh, soft and fond.
Lucretia has already been at this for half a week without pause: she is tired, and overwhelmingly anxious. But there is a strong current of determination underneath of it all that keeps her going, despite the difficulty of her task. This memory isn't as exciting or fast-paced as the other two: just a long vignette of her pouring over almost one hundred years worth of words as Lucretia tries to reconcile with herself the magnitude of what she is planning to do.)
what: october memory share event
when: 9/10 to 23/10
where: all over
warnings: n/a yet, will update if things get intense
OPEN MEMORIES:
(these memories are all open for anybody to experience! if you'd like them to be shared flick me a message/just reply and we can sort it all out as we go haha. also feel free to text lucretia to let her know you saw one of her memories if u like and we can do it that way too :-) basically i am down for whatever way you wanna interpret these! if you'd like a specific memory or something a little more personal on lucretia's end feel free to hit me up on plurk at blisters and we can sort something out! ♡ )
#1 - beyond the oceansize, i'm unaware (first or third person: happy, relaxed)
(This memory starts out with the bright sun, high in the sky, and slowly unfolds to reveal a tropical scene set out before the viewer, complete with crystal clear ocean, and white, sandy beaches. This is the first Captain Davenport appointed mental health year Lucretia and her crew experienced, after they were quick to capture the light of creation within a day or so of arriving on this world. They were able to write the rest of this cycle off and spend it relaxing by the beach, cooking for each other, swimming, taking time off from fighting off the apocalypse.
During this particular memory, Lucretia is sitting out on the sands, wearing a big floppy sunhat and sandals. She still has her bathing suit on underneath her shorts, as she's been alternating between swimming and sunbathing all day, and generally having a really good time; now, she's got a big sketchpad propped in her lap, and she's sketching with large, loose gestures, just laying down the base of what is later going to be an elaborate portrait.
The memory meanders along, but follows her careful completion of the painting: when it's done, the portrait sits propped on an easel in her quarters, a dedication to the members of the IPRE. Lucretia's family. She is in the middle, holding her book and slightly hunched. Magnus has his arm about her, a broad grin on his face; Davenport, their Captain, is in the front, looking proud and impressive in his tailored jacket. Lup and Taako are arm in arm, and Lup has her other arm flung around Barry's neck, pulling him in close. Merle looks like he's in mid-laugh, turned to face the twins. They're all in their red robed uniforms, but everybody looks so happy, so relaxed.)
#2 - as we stood tall together: first person (proud, nostalgic)
(The second memory is from a much later cycle, no less important than the first. It takes place at the Legato Conservatory, during the ceremony wherein students of the Conservatory submit various works to the Light of Creation in the hopes they will be accepted so they may be granted access to the mysterious caves grouped about the mountain. The criteria for works selected isn't entirely clear, because, unbeknownst to Lucretia and the rest of the Star Blaster crew, the submissions are reviewed and consumed by Voidfish living in the caves. If the submissions are accepted, the Voidfish choose to broadcast those works to the world at large and everybody in it. The submissions, in this way, become immortalised amongst the people who live there. If the Voidfish does not like the submission, it is erased from memory as if it never existed in the first place, so there's a bit of pressure riding on the whole situation.
Lucretia has just submitted a painting to be reviewed: a detailed depiction of a famous city market square from her hometown. Despite having not seen it in fifty years, the painting is remarkably detailed, lovingly so, and even though she's nervous about presenting it to the Light of Creation, it's clear that she's really proud of the work that she's done.
This memory is tinged with a sad sense of nostalgia for her long gone home planet, though it is swiftly replaced with overwhelming pride and excitement when the Voidfish accepts her work, and promptly broadcasts the painting into the minds of everybody on the planet.)
#3 - oh my friends, i am heavy (third person: anxious, uncertain)
(The final memory is of a different nature entirely.
This memory details Lucretia sitting cross-legged on the floor of her quarters on the Star Blaster and she is surrounded by books. Countless journals lie open on the floor and she is sifting through them with shaking hands, a fresh journal propped open on her lap. She has a quill in her left hand and every so often she pauses to scratch out a new line in accordance with something she's just read.
She is compiling every scrap of information into a final journal, one that she will eventually feed to the ship's Voidfish, causing her crew members to forget everything that had happened to them over the last one hundred years. Picking what to keep and what to erase is difficult. There are a lot of memories to sift through, and not all of them are good. Sometimes she has to pause to collect herself; other times she stops writing so she can laugh, soft and fond.
Lucretia has already been at this for half a week without pause: she is tired, and overwhelmingly anxious. But there is a strong current of determination underneath of it all that keeps her going, despite the difficulty of her task. This memory isn't as exciting or fast-paced as the other two: just a long vignette of her pouring over almost one hundred years worth of words as Lucretia tries to reconcile with herself the magnitude of what she is planning to do.)
no subject
(She doesn't laugh, but she appreciates all of Lup's efforts. It's hard to know how to deal with this, especially knowing that they will probably shift to Taako's circumstances before this memory has finished and she has no idea how Lup will react to that.)
Of course. I didn't– Davenport was the only one who... lost everything. (Her voice is tight, miserable; it's clear she is very remorseful about this.)
no subject
[Lup rubs her face with her free hand and then shakes her head.]
...but you don't need a reminder of that shit right now. I want to see where you took him.
no subject
(Not just in an emotional sense. She might have changed Taako irreversibly but she left Davenport a broken shell of a man, unable to speak after carving the history of the IPRE out of him. She exhales sharply, shakes it off. Lup's right: they can't get into this here.)
You will, I'm sure of it. I can't make it–
(Or maybe she can, because it changes the moment Lucretia and Magnus hit the edge of Raven's Roost in the distance, the scene melting away into nothingness and reappearing in a small, humble town. Lucretia hadn't taken Taako here for this specific location; she had come here to find him a stagecoach. Taako is walking with her and he isn't speaking. He keeps sneaking looks at her, like he isn't quite sure of what's going on.)
no subject
One of her ears twitch a bit as the scene changes, and Lup is watching her brother walk with Lucretia. He looks so uncertain, like he's waiting for the other shoe to drop.
He had that face a lot when they looked for jobs.]
...it looks like a nice town.
no subject
(But she didn't leave him here.
All she can think of is the bitter knock-down drag out fight of almost two months ago now, of Taako crying within the shield she had bubbled around him, his head in his hands. What the hell did I do to you that deserved that? You couldn't even give me a goddamn home!)
Lup, I... (she's not sure how much of this memory will reveal what happened, but Lup deserves to know all the same.) We didn't stop here. I found him a stagecoach and supplies and people to watch over him and– I mean, he created Sizzle It Up out of this, out of what I left him.
no subject
[She shrugs softly.]
Nobody wanted us when we were kids. Too much work, too much trouble. We had to lean on eachother to trust. He didn't have that, now.
[Even after what she promised herself, Lup releases Lucretia's hand after a little squeeze so she can walk closer to her other half.]
I should never have left. It would have been 'Sizzle it up with Taako and Lup'.
no subject
(She watches Lup trail over to the memory of Taako with this look on her face, and her heart aches.) He... when you left, he was in pieces. I thought he would run himself into the ground looking.
(Lucretia herself hadn't been around much to witness it: it had upset her too much, and she had work to do. But that dark and desperate hopelessness had permeated the ship, every single corner of it, and she had felt so keenly Taako's pain. They all had. Lucretia in particular had used it against herself to keep her writing, keep the plan in motion.)
So when it... when the time came, I added you to the book because I didn't want him to suffer. (She's staring to see through some of that irony now. Even through Taako's misery and anger she still hadn't quite understood that even for a year he could not have weathered this. Watching Lup close the distance between her and Taako makes something click dully into place.)
I thought I was... I thought that I was protecting him, but I think I was just doing it for me. Or for– for some misguided sense of... of magnanimity. (Her mouth twists into an ugly, tired grimace.) As if I knew what was best. It wasn't my choice to make, no matter what I thought.
no subject
If this meant that she finally understood... and it seems she did. It looked like she finally could admit she was wrong and why, too.
If there was something she was grateful for in this dream, it was her non-lich form - because she could at least hug the other woman now.]
It was wrong, and it's been hard for you. Now all we can do is build from that, Luce.
[Her voice is soft, but serious.]
You need to talk to Taako about this.
no subject
I... I know. I will. Some how.
(Everything's just so fraught. She isn't going to let that keep her from speaking to Taako, it just complicates things. Makes her afraid.)
no subject
[The dream starts to fade, and Lup smiles again.]
Come over later, I'll make pancakes.
no subject
Okay, (she says, and then she wakes up with a start.)