( teddy's hand and loki's midsection stuck between legs means neither of them are going anywhere and that's what he wants, so. teddy's hand gets dragged down to a chest where billy also holds onto loki, fuck his protests from before. this is fine. )
You killed at least two people. You're not going anywhere. ( billy isn't giving him room for means of escape either, thanks. )
And I'm still mad at you. ( not you, teddy. you're great. hasn't done a single thing wrong. )
[Fine-- he'll get poked and prodded. Or at least try to let it happen, if it really makes Billy feel better. Dealing with two stubborn mages? It feels easier to just give in. He lets himself be dragged in giving Billy's hand a reassuring squeeze.
Although that? Earns a shocked look.]
Wait-- what? [Killed?]
You killed people? [They were cultists, sure, but-- they'd get their punishment another way.]
I've murdered entire armies of cultists before, these were no different. Fanatics who wanted to cause harm, holding my family captive and tortured. [ The fleets of Angels went to their deaths unknowingly, good for them. ] The madmen of the temple refused to die so cleanly, that's the only difference. They took away any magic I might have used to teleport them into the middle of the jungle ... but I don't think I would have, in any case.
[ He turns around in the grip of Billy's legs, sighing as he gently brushes back a dirtied floppy fringe. ]
I felt your terror when they took you. It almost drove me to my knees, but I got back up to find you. To save you. That's all I've been thinking about ever since.
( it leaves him on loki's lap with teddy's hand pressed against the godling's back but that's--fine. still doesn't give loki enough room to escape, which is what really matters right now. fingers grip hard onto teddy's own, surprisingly tight considering how exhausted he feels. a sign teddy's definitely not going forgotten, even if billy's a little preoccupied dealing with
well. the little shit in front of him. ) You wanted to close that off, remember? Look, I'm--( not fine, he's not going to lie. ) alive. And we don't kill people. I don't care what you did be--( wait, that's also a lie. ) I mean, it's--I care? But. Don't.
( brows furrow, lips pursing for a second before he realizes how much that hurts with how bruised and bloodied his mouth is. )
[Teddy is too exhausted to even-- really get properly worked up. They don't kill. That's not what they do, but Billy is handling that, and it'll probably mean more coming from him than Teddy anyway--
And he's not entirely comfortable with where Billy has his hand pressed when he and Loki are-- that close. It feels a little too personal... invasive maybe. But it's clear that Billy is not letting it go and Teddy doesn't have it in him to yank it away.
So his eyes trail away, trying to give some semblance of privacy at least.]
I didn't do it before, I wasn't the Old Man. I was me. [ He knows that's where Billy was going with that, shutting it down so that he can scrub off the halo Billy wants to balance on his horns. ] Those people tortured you and Teddy and my brother, I don't care if they're dead. Better that they are. If you were held hostage by Malekith I'd hack that asshole up too! [ Somehow.
Loki drops his head, hands resting on Billy's shoulders. ]
This is me being better. I'm not going to run around stabbing cultists in the back now you're safe, you don't have to hold me prisoner.
( not exactly where he was going with it, but--god, he's too tired to try and argue it too deeply right now. the hand not holding onto teddy releases loki, raises to run through his hair and grip hard onto strands, tugging at his roots a little. )
I can't deal with this right now. ( so he releases loki. uncrosses his ankles, even if he's not moving off of his lap. and pulls teddy's hand to try and get him closer. ) I can't--deal with any of this. I don't know? My head hurts, I don't know what you want, what I'm doing, I want to go to sleep but I don't--( want to deal with the nightmares, and there are others out there who still need help and he can--do something about that.
his voice is notably smaller when he speaks up again, hand pressed to the nonbruised side of his face. ) Why's everything so hard?
[Okay-- they're all tired. They're all stressed. They're all dealing with their own trauma, their own issues... And no, Teddy doesn't condone the killing, but he gets where Loki is coming from. He hates that he did it, but-- Billy's been desperate enough in a similar situation to wish death on someone. He'd been desperate enough to want to do it too.
He didn't, and he wishes Loki hadn't, but it's not going to help anything right now arguing about it.
The tug gets him to awkwardly sit on the edge of the bed, a bit closer to Billy. One hand squeezes Billy's and the other reaches out to rest on Loki's shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze in what he hopes is a comforting gesture.]
Come on-- we're all too tired for this. It can be talked about later. Nothing is going to get solved right now... everything is too fresh and raw. [And hopefully, a doctor will be in soon enough.]
Lie down, Billy. Rest a little. You can't help anyone until you take care of yourself a little. [Just in case he thought he was actually going back out there.]
Loki and I will be here... no one's going to hurt you. [And hopefully, that'll be enough to deal with nightmares. He's certainly not sleeping anytime soon.]
[ Teddy's touch is new and surprising, somehow exactly what Loki needs. An anchor to a port close to Billy. He chews his lip, reaching up to brush his fingers through Billy's hair ... then over his forehead. ]
We need all need to sleep, some more than others. Isa.
[ Sure was the runic incantation, loosely translated and packed with Loki's own sentiment to bend the spell, for Sleep. He reaches to catch Billy before he can topple over. ]
( there's a word of protest that lives on his lips, but it's quickly stifled out by loki's hand pressed to his forehead, the words murmured. eyes roll back before he's slumping forward, pressing a cheek to loki's shoulder as arms fall down to his sides.
Teddy lets out a relieved sigh as Billy falls asleep, body going slack. Yeah, he's probably going to be annoyed by that later, but-- at least he's slept, right? He kinda desperately needed it.
With his hand out of Billy's death grip for now, he goes to carefully slide back to his feet.]
There are a couple questionably comfortable chairs in here. Want to sit for a bit after Billy gets settled into bed?
[ Lifting Billy into the bed as the nurses make a timely arrival, he nods to Teddy. ]
Sure, one moment ...
[ The hand over Billy's closed eyes glows green, imbuing his dreams with visions of Old Asgard as it once was, a peaceful tour of the grandeur of the Golden Realm. That's as harmless a place to wander as any, a beautiful exchange to banish nightmares. ]
... Let's find a coffee machine of the vending kind.
[ Tired as he is, he casts a once over on Teddy. ]
[Teddy casts one more look back to Billy, just one more look to reassure himself Billy is okay, that he's being tended to, before he nods at Loki and moves to follow him.]
Coffee sounds like the best idea right now.
[Any kind of coffee. You never realize how much you'll miss the little things until crazy cultists have you kidnapped...]
Yeah, I think so. [He looks down at himself, over his arms where bruises are already beginning to fade.] It might take a day or two before I'm entirely back to myself, but I'm already feeling better. I don't think I've ever been beat up that bad before though...
[That suppressor is something he never wants to experience again. He looks at Loki, giving him a once over.]
[ Sounding a little wistful even if his own healing is rather speedy, he's relieved not to have to look at two smashed up YA's.
In front of a vending machine in the hall he roots around in the pocket of his coat for change (if he stole things all the time he'd never get to switch it up), focusing more on the coffee selection than Teddy's face. How is Loki? ]
Scotch tape on scaffolding. Ever heard that saying?
[ Handing one of the coffees over, he shrugs with an exhaustion that feels bone-deep. Will he ever rid the bags from his eyes? Not at this rate. It's quiet in the hospital, no one else has made it over from the temple yet.
Loki sips his cheap latte with a middle-ground gaze locked down the corridor. ]
I think I made another mistake by trying to rescue him. He didn't need to see me, not the same way I needed him.
All I wanted to do was find him and get him out, take him home. I thought, if he was as desperate to see me as I was to see him then he'd understand, he would come immediately because all we'd need was to see each other was okay. But he cared more about healing the fanatics who tortured him. [ Quietly incredulous, he takes a seat on a bench. ] I can't ... can't dial down my priorities like that. I felt like a fool, arguing why he should leave with me.
[ Running on nothing but the memory of Billy's terror for days, maybe Loki was too earnest. He can't tell. There were cultists actively trying to hurt his friends, even Jim was shooting to put them down once and for all.
He stares ahead at the manilla wall, unseeing it. Hands clasped around a warm plastic cup. ]
I have nothing else to give, Teddy. I would kill for him and it's somehow a problem.
That's Billy... It's not that he cared more about them than he did you, Loki. He just doesn't believe in killing. [He moves over to take a seat next to him after a moment.][He barely suppresses a shudder at the memory, but he continues on--] The Warden put a device on him where he could hear others, but not himself... his magic was useless. He couldn't stop him. It got to the point where he was wishing death on him and even just that-- it's something Billy's never forgiven himself for. It's still one of the things that makes him so scared of himself...
[He gives a wry smile.] He doesn't want you to go down that road, I think. He doesn't want you to lose yourself. He doesn't want to lose you.
You say that, but I'm not a hero. He wants another you, not me as I am.
[ It's hard being inadequate when you're a god who literally lives on praise. Thank fuck his entire base isn't noble like Billy or he'd cease to exist within seconds. ]
He told me to be better. Better than what, saving him at any cost? Teddy, I've got nothing left, this is me at my best. This relationship is running on fumes on my end.
[He reaches over again to rest a hand on Loki's shoulder again, just trying to offer-- something. Comfort, hopefully.
He might have never thought he'd be in this position in a million years, but he is and he wants to try to help somehow.]
Stop it. That's not what he meant-- he thinks you're amazing, Loki. He doesn't want another me and I'm not here to swoop in and take him away from you or anything like that. I-- [he lets out a sigh, deflating a little.]
He said he's content here, he's content with you and he never was back home. I clearly can't offer him that, and honestly, I don't know what I can offer him that you can't or haven't already.
[It is hard feeling inadequate, Teddy can agree there.] You'll both figure it out, Loki.
[ What he craves is what he sees in his memories when he thinks of Tony; wide open arms that wanted him close just because, no matter what else was going on with them or others. No arguments first. No needling criticisms.
He misses that stupid engineer.
Looking at Teddy who has recently been tortured too, lost his lover to Loki, and who is now comforting said harlot, he makes a split-second decision to do something that can't possibly be considered awful or cruel, leaning over to kiss him on the lips with a chaste peck, a hand on the one upon his shoulder. ]
[The kiss catches him off guard, but-- honestly? It's one of the very few pleasant things he's experience since kidnapping and torture, and he doesn't think Loki means ill by it, so he's willing to take it and press into it a little before Loki pulls away.]
I don't know what that was for, but--
[Teddy offers up a tired, fonder smile and lifts his hand to brush through Loki's hair soothingly, tucking it into place.]
You want to take our coffees and go back to Billy's room for a bit? Maybe we can get some rest too.
[ A soft happy noise hums into the kiss when he feels pressure on Teddy's side, calmer for having shared it. The agonisingly prickly sensation has gone when he thinks about Billy in that bed and both of them either side of him; Teddy is something of an emotional balm. Loki tries not to overthink the stillness in his previously broiling stomach. ]
Yeah, okay.
[ His hand slips into Teddy's free one, cool as he clasps it and tugs him down the hall at a slow, tired lope. ]
If he complains again when he rises, let's order food to shut him up.
[He didn't-- react well when he first arrived here. He'd been hurt and angry and lost...
But after what's happened? It's sort of put a lot of that into perspective, and right now? With Loki not being just as prickly and defensive, opening up a little... It's easy to feel fond of him. It's easy to want to try and soothe whatever roughness he can. They're all in horrible shape, but maybe together, they can make it a little bit better at least.
He slides his hand into Loki's and gives a short laugh.]
Good plan. Also-- that spell? The best. I thought we'd still be arguing with him to sleep... He's like a bull when he sets his mind to something.
[He's amazing, don't get him wrong, but that stubbornness...]
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You killed at least two people. You're not going anywhere. ( billy isn't giving him room for means of escape either, thanks. )
And I'm still mad at you. ( not you, teddy. you're great. hasn't done a single thing wrong. )
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Although that? Earns a shocked look.]
Wait-- what? [Killed?]
You killed people? [They were cultists, sure, but-- they'd get their punishment another way.]
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[ He turns around in the grip of Billy's legs, sighing as he gently brushes back a dirtied floppy fringe. ]
I felt your terror when they took you. It almost drove me to my knees, but I got back up to find you. To save you. That's all I've been thinking about ever since.
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well. the little shit in front of him. ) You wanted to close that off, remember? Look, I'm--( not fine, he's not going to lie. ) alive. And we don't kill people. I don't care what you did be--( wait, that's also a lie. ) I mean, it's--I care? But. Don't.
( brows furrow, lips pursing for a second before he realizes how much that hurts with how bruised and bloodied his mouth is. )
I need you to try and be better than that.
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And he's not entirely comfortable with where Billy has his hand pressed when he and Loki are-- that close. It feels a little too personal... invasive maybe. But it's clear that Billy is not letting it go and Teddy doesn't have it in him to yank it away.
So his eyes trail away, trying to give some semblance of privacy at least.]
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Loki drops his head, hands resting on Billy's shoulders. ]
This is me being better. I'm not going to run around stabbing cultists in the back now you're safe, you don't have to hold me prisoner.
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I can't deal with this right now. ( so he releases loki. uncrosses his ankles, even if he's not moving off of his lap. and pulls teddy's hand to try and get him closer. ) I can't--deal with any of this. I don't know? My head hurts, I don't know what you want, what I'm doing, I want to go to sleep but I don't--( want to deal with the nightmares, and there are others out there who still need help and he can--do something about that.
his voice is notably smaller when he speaks up again, hand pressed to the nonbruised side of his face. ) Why's everything so hard?
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He didn't, and he wishes Loki hadn't, but it's not going to help anything right now arguing about it.
The tug gets him to awkwardly sit on the edge of the bed, a bit closer to Billy. One hand squeezes Billy's and the other reaches out to rest on Loki's shoulder, giving it a firm squeeze in what he hopes is a comforting gesture.]
Come on-- we're all too tired for this. It can be talked about later. Nothing is going to get solved right now... everything is too fresh and raw. [And hopefully, a doctor will be in soon enough.]
Lie down, Billy. Rest a little. You can't help anyone until you take care of yourself a little. [Just in case he thought he was actually going back out there.]
Loki and I will be here... no one's going to hurt you. [And hopefully, that'll be enough to deal with nightmares. He's certainly not sleeping anytime soon.]
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We need all need to sleep, some more than others. Isa.
[ Sure was the runic incantation, loosely translated and packed with Loki's own sentiment to bend the spell, for Sleep. He reaches to catch Billy before he can topple over. ]
... He can be angry when he's rested.
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good night. )
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Teddy lets out a relieved sigh as Billy falls asleep, body going slack. Yeah, he's probably going to be annoyed by that later, but-- at least he's slept, right? He kinda desperately needed it.
With his hand out of Billy's death grip for now, he goes to carefully slide back to his feet.]
There are a couple questionably comfortable chairs in here. Want to sit for a bit after Billy gets settled into bed?
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Sure, one moment ...
[ The hand over Billy's closed eyes glows green, imbuing his dreams with visions of Old Asgard as it once was, a peaceful tour of the grandeur of the Golden Realm. That's as harmless a place to wander as any, a beautiful exchange to banish nightmares. ]
... Let's find a coffee machine of the vending kind.
[ Tired as he is, he casts a once over on Teddy. ]
Are you healing quickly?
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Coffee sounds like the best idea right now.
[Any kind of coffee. You never realize how much you'll miss the little things until crazy cultists have you kidnapped...]
Yeah, I think so. [He looks down at himself, over his arms where bruises are already beginning to fade.] It might take a day or two before I'm entirely back to myself, but I'm already feeling better. I don't think I've ever been beat up that bad before though...
[That suppressor is something he never wants to experience again. He looks at Loki, giving him a once over.]
How about you? Are you okay?
[Probably not, at least mentally or emotionally.]
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[ Sounding a little wistful even if his own healing is rather speedy, he's relieved not to have to look at two smashed up YA's.
In front of a vending machine in the hall he roots around in the pocket of his coat for change (if he stole things all the time he'd never get to switch it up), focusing more on the coffee selection than Teddy's face. How is Loki? ]
Scotch tape on scaffolding. Ever heard that saying?
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[He slides his hands into his pocket after a moment, going to lean against the wall while Loki handles the coffee.]
... I'm sorry. I'm sure the last-- however many days haven't been easy on you either. You should be trying to rest up too.
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Loki sips his cheap latte with a middle-ground gaze locked down the corridor. ]
I think I made another mistake by trying to rescue him. He didn't need to see me, not the same way I needed him.
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[He takes the coffee with a quiet thanks, cradling it in his hand for a moment.]
Of course he needed to see you. He's just-- trying to process a lot right now. He's not thinking clearly or reacting well.
[Teddy is pretty sure about that, if only by the way Billy hadn't quite wanted to let go of Loki.]
You didn't make a mistake by rescuing him... trust me. Besides, I'm glad you came for him... that you were there for him.
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[ Running on nothing but the memory of Billy's terror for days, maybe Loki was too earnest. He can't tell. There were cultists actively trying to hurt his friends, even Jim was shooting to put them down once and for all.
He stares ahead at the manilla wall, unseeing it. Hands clasped around a warm plastic cup. ]
I have nothing else to give, Teddy. I would kill for him and it's somehow a problem.
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[He gives a wry smile.] He doesn't want you to go down that road, I think. He doesn't want you to lose yourself. He doesn't want to lose you.
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[ It's hard being inadequate when you're a god who literally lives on praise. Thank fuck his entire base isn't noble like Billy or he'd cease to exist within seconds. ]
He told me to be better. Better than what, saving him at any cost? Teddy, I've got nothing left, this is me at my best. This relationship is running on fumes on my end.
You may as well swoop in and take him back.
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[He reaches over again to rest a hand on Loki's shoulder again, just trying to offer-- something. Comfort, hopefully.
He might have never thought he'd be in this position in a million years, but he is and he wants to try to help somehow.]
Stop it. That's not what he meant-- he thinks you're amazing, Loki. He doesn't want another me and I'm not here to swoop in and take him away from you or anything like that. I-- [he lets out a sigh, deflating a little.]
He said he's content here, he's content with you and he never was back home. I clearly can't offer him that, and honestly, I don't know what I can offer him that you can't or haven't already.
[It is hard feeling inadequate, Teddy can agree there.] You'll both figure it out, Loki.
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He misses that stupid engineer.
Looking at Teddy who has recently been tortured too, lost his lover to Loki, and who is now comforting said harlot, he makes a split-second decision to do something that can't possibly be considered awful or cruel, leaning over to kiss him on the lips with a chaste peck, a hand on the one upon his shoulder. ]
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I don't know what that was for, but--
[Teddy offers up a tired, fonder smile and lifts his hand to brush through Loki's hair soothingly, tucking it into place.]
You want to take our coffees and go back to Billy's room for a bit? Maybe we can get some rest too.
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Yeah, okay.
[ His hand slips into Teddy's free one, cool as he clasps it and tugs him down the hall at a slow, tired lope. ]
If he complains again when he rises, let's order food to shut him up.
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But after what's happened? It's sort of put a lot of that into perspective, and right now? With Loki not being just as prickly and defensive, opening up a little... It's easy to feel fond of him. It's easy to want to try and soothe whatever roughness he can. They're all in horrible shape, but maybe together, they can make it a little bit better at least.
He slides his hand into Loki's and gives a short laugh.]
Good plan. Also-- that spell? The best. I thought we'd still be arguing with him to sleep... He's like a bull when he sets his mind to something.
[He's amazing, don't get him wrong, but that stubbornness...]
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