October Catch All and Memory Share [open]

[lionunchained]

who: Shiro and YOU
what: memory share + catch all
when: All October
warnings: second memory share = torture reference



Memory 1 - How to Build Voltron
Memory 2 - Black Night - trigger warning - torture
Closed to Keith
Closed to Genji

Comments

[bunnyhopped]

[ Luckily, the memory seemed to fade to black around them, leaving her and Shiro sort of floating about in a dark dreamscape. It was a strange way to be, and part of her wondered if she should try and wake herself up and go see him in real life, if that would help more than... this. Maybe a real life hug would do better than one here.

She could sense, at least, that he was a little conflicted about whether or not he wanted to talk about what she'd seen. Genji could be that way sometimes whenever she asked about his past, although she was sure that it was more for want of keeping his past life separate from his current, more peaceful state of being in the older man's case. For Shiro... ]

It doesn't have to make sense or anything. Just tell me what you're thinking.

[ Another beat before she added, ] If you want to. I mean, I'll listen to whatever you want to say.

[lionunchained]

[Shiro was wondering if they could wake up as well, not wanting to be surrounded by this any more with the possibility that it could somehow be triggered again and he'd have to start watching it again. Once was enough for one night. Once was enough for several nights as far as he was concerned.

He hadn't even really told the other paladins what he had been through. For some reason though, it was different with Hana. Like how he could use video games with her as an escape and not have to be serious, he didn't have to keep things hidden from her. It wouldn't change how someone treated him on a mission, how they saw him as a leader. The words practically wanted to come leaping out, but when he opened his mouth]

I don't think I can.

[bunnyhopped]

[ Certainly, Hana was different because before the Black Paladin or the team leader of Voltron, she just knew him as Shiro. Without the other paladins around, too, she didn't have as clear of a sense as to how much of his team's burden he shouldered as his own. She knew that he and Keith were close, but their bond really seemed more than just people on a team - they seemed a lot like brothers, to her.

She watched him carefully, waiting for his response, wondering what he would say. She blinked a few times when he said that he didn't think he could. Most people she'd encountered like this in her dreams - either talked about it or didn't want to. That Shiro said he couldn't... It made her heart ache for him. He must have been so deeply hurt by all of this. Which— after seeing what she had, made complete sense and she would never fault him for it.

This time, she really couldn't help it. She raised her arms and wrapped them around Shiro, pulling him into a hug. Against his shoulder, she said, ]

That's okay. You don't have to talk about it if you can't or don't want to.

[lionunchained]

[Keith was different. He practically was a younger brother to Shiro. He was also trusted more than some of the other paladins. He was the one that Shiro had picked to be his successor if something should happen to him. But even so he worried about Keith. He worried about the others as well. Some of them more than others. He had to be the one in charge in order to make sure things went smoothly. Even as they were working together with less supervision, he still did help with the plans.

Words failed him when he wanted to talk about what had happened. There was too much that there didn't seem to be a way for the words to get out without getting tangled. There was just... everything. How could he possibly explain a year? He couldn't even tell the others back home.

But then she was hugging him. She had just watched something he was most ashamed of and she was still there and hugging him. He frowned even though she wasn't able to see and pressed his head against hers]

Thank you. I just don't know how to.

[bunnyhopped]

[ She was glad that he didn't push her away - she wasn't sure, at first, if he would be okay with her doing that even if this was in a dream. It was still a vulnerable moment for the both of them, but him especially. He didn't try to pull away - he even had to hunch over a lot because of how much shorter she was compared to him and he didn't make a move away, instead pressing his head to hers. Still, she kept her arms around him loose and pliable, still, just in case. ]

It's fine if you don't know how to. No one's making you talk about it, 'kay? I'm sorry this happened to you, Shiro.

[lionunchained]

[Shiro just nodded against her, trying to get words to work again, but there wasn't a chance he was going to be able to talk about this. He really just wanted someone to hold onto, an emotional safe haven when his own brain was not working properly. He'd always worried that someone would push him away if they actually saw this, but she wasn't pushing him away]

Thank you.

[bunnyhopped]

[ She wasn't pushing him away. In fact, her arms tightened around him just the slightest when he nodded against her and thanked her. This wasn't real - it was just a dream, but she hoped that the gesture would mean as much as it would have if it happened in person. ]

You're welcome.