[open] cast an illusion

[franciscoramon]

who: cisco + anyone!
what: memory share event & catch-all
when: october
where: anywhere
warnings: murder, torture, bullying

MEMORIES

Feel free to either have your character text Cisco (or comment on this post but indicate a text message) about having a vision / dream of his past, or to come to where he is to discuss it.

A. MURDER {third person dream OR first person vision}

[watch here

This memory is both intensely traumatic and one that Cisco has relived many many times. Have fun with it if you want, there may be small distortions - sometimes Cisco seems to remember Eobard's demeanor being gleeful, even smiling as he kills him. There may be odd gaps here and there, as well as inconsistencies. Or you can play it totally straight, just as it happened.]

B. VIBING {first person; vision}

[watch here (memory lasts up 'til 2:30)

This memory is likely to come across in jumbled pieces at first, and then more clearly as the week progresses. What's most important is that this memory captures the subjective experience of vibing from Cisco's perspective. So at one moment the memory is of looking down at a microscope slide of sand, feeling intense unease and fear, to hands reaching out and touching the sand. Once that contact is established, there is a swooping feeling, like missing a step going down stairs or plummeting on a roller coaster, and then the world goes static-y, with strange flashes of light, blurred vision, and an eerie blue tint. The warehouse that Cisco sees feels intensely present, though sounds are a bit muffled and occasionally there are jumps and starts. The end of the vision is as jarring as the start, and afterwards there is the confrontation with Stein, and a palpable feeling of panic over being interrupted and witnessed.]

C. PRISONER {first person; vision}

[watch here

This memory is clear and vivid, accompanied by feelings of hunger, exhaustion, frustration. Feel free to supplement after the cutoff at the end of the scene a moment where Cisco begs that he's already made them weapons (the heat, cold, and gold guns) and that's enough, and also Snart threatening to just out and out kill Dante, both of which are confirmed to happen but aren't shown in the clip I linked.]

D. BABY NERD PT 1 {third person; dream}

[ Cisco can't be older than nine or so, and he's adorable. We're talking a criminally cute child. His hair is cut short, which makes his ears stick out a little, and there's a tooth missing his bottom row of teeth. He's small for his age, (looks even smaller because he's wearing what are clearly hand-me-down clothes), all round-cheeked and bright-eyed. He comes bounding up to a bench in what looks like a small neighborhood park. Sitting on the bench is a pretty brunette girl with a high ponytail and big earrings, and a boy that looks a little like Cisco, around five years older. Cisco, bubbly and excited, asks: ]

Hey Val, hey Dante, do you wanna see what I made?

[ Dante, who has a hand very obviously and purposefully perched on Val's knee, glares absolute daggers at his little brother, but before he can say anything she answers with genuine interest: ]

Yeah, totally.

[ Cisco beams and pulls the lid off the shoebox. Inside is rather ugly-looking device, clearly cobbled together with materials from a bunch of different things. But Cisco pulls it out carefully as if it's the most precious thing on earth and holds it up, explaining in a delighted rush, what it is and how he made it. He has apparently cobbled together pieces from a broken cell phone, an old malfunctioning digital camera, and a half-smashed mp3 player, into a frankenstein'd device that can take pictures, make phone calls, and play music, too. Val sits up as he explains, going from indulgent to this kid with his little doodad to genuinely excited. Cisco hands it over to her and she tests it out, taking a photo of the beaming Cisco, clicking a number code onto the pad which makes 'I Could Fall In Love' by Selena play (though only loud enough that she has to hold the thing to her ear like a phone to hear it). Then, she even uses it as a phone, calling her mom, exclaiming that it really works, and hanging up again. ]

Cisco, this is so cool.

[ She jumps to her feet, saying that she's got to go get her best friend from the corner store across the street to bring her to see it, too, and goes rushing off. Cisco just stands there, holding the thing and beaming like he's never been more proud of himself in his entire life. ]

E. BABY NERD PT 2 {third person; dream}

[ (Continued from the last one, for anyone who wants an angst component)

As this scene was happening with Val, Dante was getting more and more visibly annoyed, trying to redirect attention back to himself. As soon as she leaves Dante snatches the device from Cisco, turning it over once or twice, unimpressed. Cisco's face falls, shifting from joy to trepidation, like he knows something bad is going to happen. Dante doesn't disappoint; he tosses the thing in the air and then catches it as it falls. Cisco pleads: ]

Dante, don't!

[ Which, of course, only seems to encourage the older boy. Dante throws it into the air, higher this time, and catches it, but Cisco winces, clearly terrified that he'll drop it. He tries to grab it away from his older brother, but Dante gets to his feet, holding it above his head. ]

Come on, don't be such a fucking girl, I'm not gonna drop it.

[ He tosses it into the air with enough momentum to it goes behind him and he has to spin to catch it. Cisco keeps pleading with him to quit it, trying to wrestle it away from Dante, who only laughs. It's inevitable, what happens eventually. Dante hurls the thing much too high, and it's hard to say, whether he was really trying to catch it or not. Either way, it slips between his hands and crashes onto the asphalt, shattering into about a dozen pieces. Cisco scrambles to pick up all the pieces, but the lens from the camera has shattered and the casing is cracked. ]

Oops.

[ Dante shrugs, sounds absolutely unapologetic. Cisco starts sniffling, fighting back tears as he tries to fit the thing back together. He starts putting the pieces back into the shoebox, wiping tears from his cheeks as they start to fall but saying nothing, not even looking at his brother. Dante, for his part, says scornfully: ]

Seriously, Cisco, it was an accident. You gotta stop being such a sissy all the time. It doesn't look good.

[ Then he walks off in the direction that Val had gone without another word, leaving Cisco to clean up the rest of the mess. ]

OR hit me up on plurk to plot something else!

Comments

[causational]

[Knowing and really believing are different things - consciously, Eddie knows and is aware that Cisco cares about him a lot, probably as much as he cares about Cisco, and it isn't that he disbelieves what Cisco is saying. It's just hard to absorb, hard to really conceptualize as part of his life after spending so long caring more about other people than they cared about him. His parents, Iris, most of his friends, Taako, and the list goes on; it's hard to truly understand that Cisco means it, that the way Eddie feels about him is the same way Cisco feels about Eddie.

But he does understand that Cisco means it when he says that his life would be way worse without him, he does understand the way something in Cisco lightens and softens and gets warmer in response to Eddie and what he says and does. So Eddie hugs him back, arms wrapped around his shoulders, one hand sliding up into his hair as his eyes sink shut and he hums softly, a content sound.

When Cisco moves on from the topic at hand, Eddie lets him, though he doesn't let go of it himself, not entirely. He knows that even if Cisco is moving past it, it'll be sitting in the back of his mind gnawing just a little, even if it's gnawing a little less hard than it would've been if he hadn't talked to Eddie.]

If you want to help me cut up some of the vegetables to go with the steaks, that'd be really great. I like cooking with you.

[Eddie offers a little smile, lifting his hand and stroking back Cisco's hair behind his ear, holding his gaze.]

I like doing everything with you. You're so, so great.

[franciscoramon]

[ There are times, when Eddie is looking right at him, with his blue eyes warm and all crinkly at the corners, when Cisco can't quite believe what he's seeing is real. That anyone could look at him with that much happiness, and warmth, and affection. Sometimes that disbelief comes with a dash of fear - how long, until Eddie doesn't look at him like that anymore, until he realizes that Cisco does not deserve it? Sometimes it comes with hope - that maybe this time, things are going to be really, truly different. That Eddie is going to break this vicious cycle he's found himself in, where every time something seems to be good, fate comes along to ruin it.

Cisco can't help but smile back at Eddie, nodding and saying, with growing cheerfulness: ]

I'll cut as many vegetables you want, baby. I'll even eat some of 'em, too.

[ It's an old joke, well-worn at the edges and familiar - that Cisco doesn't eat enough healthy food, and that Eddie is always trying to concoct new ways to convince him to do it. It feels safe, and comfortable, and good. And so does settling in to the kitchen, slicing carrots as Eddie goes back to sautéing.

He is more glad than ever, as the two of them cook quietly together (at some point Eddie switches on a radio, and Cisco hums along to a few of the songs), that he came here. He and Eddie have talked about how Eddie got a second chance to live, here. But Cisco thinks that maybe it's his second chance, too. ]

I like doing everything with you, too.

[causational]

[To Eddie, it simply isn't a matter of deserving. While he certainly applies standards to what he perceives as his own entitlement to affection, to love, to being wanted and desirable, it wouldn't cross his mind to think of those standards applying to anyone else. Eddie loves easily and often unconditionally, and enjoys it. He doesn't foresee thinking Cisco doesn't deserve to be looked at the way he's looking at him now. He doesn't think Cisco needs to do anything to 'earn' his affection.

All of the things Eddie likes about Cisco are part of who he is - his intelligence and wit and kindness and generosity and loyalty and heroism - all of those are things that, in Eddie's mind, just aren't going to go anywhere. They're also things he's always valued, that he won't just stop valuing. They're the traits that made tiny Eddie Thawne get crushes on movie characters or classmates, that drew him to help out on Team Flash in the first place.

So when Cisco says he might even eat some of the vegetables, Eddie isn't thinking about how his affection and desire might fade eventually, he isn't worrying about whether he'll continue to be attracted to Cisco, he's just amused and pleased at the joking banter between them. Flattered at Cisco's assertion that he likes doing everything with Eddie too.]

Mmmm, well, in that case we should definitely cook and eat vegetables together as often as possible.

[Eddie flips the steaks again, glances over at Cisco for a few long moments, then shakes his head.]

You know, I'm really amazed by you Cisco Ramon. Like, all of the stuff that you are, is really amazing to me. You're this bright, beautiful, intelligent, funny person. I'm just...really glad this happened. You and me.