riverviewlogs | [open] cast an illusion

who: cisco + anyone!
what: memory share event & catch-all
when: october
where: anywhere
warnings: murder, torture, bullying

MEMORIES

Feel free to either have your character text Cisco (or comment on this post but indicate a text message) about having a vision / dream of his past, or to come to where he is to discuss it.

A. MURDER {third person dream OR first person vision}

[watch here

This memory is both intensely traumatic and one that Cisco has relived many many times. Have fun with it if you want, there may be small distortions - sometimes Cisco seems to remember Eobard's demeanor being gleeful, even smiling as he kills him. There may be odd gaps here and there, as well as inconsistencies. Or you can play it totally straight, just as it happened.]

B. VIBING {first person; vision}

[watch here (memory lasts up 'til 2:30)

This memory is likely to come across in jumbled pieces at first, and then more clearly as the week progresses. What's most important is that this memory captures the subjective experience of vibing from Cisco's perspective. So at one moment the memory is of looking down at a microscope slide of sand, feeling intense unease and fear, to hands reaching out and touching the sand. Once that contact is established, there is a swooping feeling, like missing a step going down stairs or plummeting on a roller coaster, and then the world goes static-y, with strange flashes of light, blurred vision, and an eerie blue tint. The warehouse that Cisco sees feels intensely present, though sounds are a bit muffled and occasionally there are jumps and starts. The end of the vision is as jarring as the start, and afterwards there is the confrontation with Stein, and a palpable feeling of panic over being interrupted and witnessed.]

C. PRISONER {first person; vision}

[watch here

This memory is clear and vivid, accompanied by feelings of hunger, exhaustion, frustration. Feel free to supplement after the cutoff at the end of the scene a moment where Cisco begs that he's already made them weapons (the heat, cold, and gold guns) and that's enough, and also Snart threatening to just out and out kill Dante, both of which are confirmed to happen but aren't shown in the clip I linked.]

D. BABY NERD PT 1 {third person; dream}

[ Cisco can't be older than nine or so, and he's adorable. We're talking a criminally cute child. His hair is cut short, which makes his ears stick out a little, and there's a tooth missing his bottom row of teeth. He's small for his age, (looks even smaller because he's wearing what are clearly hand-me-down clothes), all round-cheeked and bright-eyed. He comes bounding up to a bench in what looks like a small neighborhood park. Sitting on the bench is a pretty brunette girl with a high ponytail and big earrings, and a boy that looks a little like Cisco, around five years older. Cisco, bubbly and excited, asks: ]

Hey Val, hey Dante, do you wanna see what I made?

[ Dante, who has a hand very obviously and purposefully perched on Val's knee, glares absolute daggers at his little brother, but before he can say anything she answers with genuine interest: ]

Yeah, totally.

[ Cisco beams and pulls the lid off the shoebox. Inside is rather ugly-looking device, clearly cobbled together with materials from a bunch of different things. But Cisco pulls it out carefully as if it's the most precious thing on earth and holds it up, explaining in a delighted rush, what it is and how he made it. He has apparently cobbled together pieces from a broken cell phone, an old malfunctioning digital camera, and a half-smashed mp3 player, into a frankenstein'd device that can take pictures, make phone calls, and play music, too. Val sits up as he explains, going from indulgent to this kid with his little doodad to genuinely excited. Cisco hands it over to her and she tests it out, taking a photo of the beaming Cisco, clicking a number code onto the pad which makes 'I Could Fall In Love' by Selena play (though only loud enough that she has to hold the thing to her ear like a phone to hear it). Then, she even uses it as a phone, calling her mom, exclaiming that it really works, and hanging up again. ]

Cisco, this is so cool.

[ She jumps to her feet, saying that she's got to go get her best friend from the corner store across the street to bring her to see it, too, and goes rushing off. Cisco just stands there, holding the thing and beaming like he's never been more proud of himself in his entire life. ]

E. BABY NERD PT 2 {third person; dream}

[ (Continued from the last one, for anyone who wants an angst component)

As this scene was happening with Val, Dante was getting more and more visibly annoyed, trying to redirect attention back to himself. As soon as she leaves Dante snatches the device from Cisco, turning it over once or twice, unimpressed. Cisco's face falls, shifting from joy to trepidation, like he knows something bad is going to happen. Dante doesn't disappoint; he tosses the thing in the air and then catches it as it falls. Cisco pleads: ]

Dante, don't!

[ Which, of course, only seems to encourage the older boy. Dante throws it into the air, higher this time, and catches it, but Cisco winces, clearly terrified that he'll drop it. He tries to grab it away from his older brother, but Dante gets to his feet, holding it above his head. ]

Come on, don't be such a fucking girl, I'm not gonna drop it.

[ He tosses it into the air with enough momentum to it goes behind him and he has to spin to catch it. Cisco keeps pleading with him to quit it, trying to wrestle it away from Dante, who only laughs. It's inevitable, what happens eventually. Dante hurls the thing much too high, and it's hard to say, whether he was really trying to catch it or not. Either way, it slips between his hands and crashes onto the asphalt, shattering into about a dozen pieces. Cisco scrambles to pick up all the pieces, but the lens from the camera has shattered and the casing is cracked. ]

Oops.

[ Dante shrugs, sounds absolutely unapologetic. Cisco starts sniffling, fighting back tears as he tries to fit the thing back together. He starts putting the pieces back into the shoebox, wiping tears from his cheeks as they start to fall but saying nothing, not even looking at his brother. Dante, for his part, says scornfully: ]

Seriously, Cisco, it was an accident. You gotta stop being such a sissy all the time. It doesn't look good.

[ Then he walks off in the direction that Val had gone without another word, leaving Cisco to clean up the rest of the mess. ]

OR hit me up on plurk to plot something else!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ It was in fact obvious that it was a joke, and it's enough to make Cisco smile, half in relief and half amusement. ]

thank you.

oh okay, i know the one you mean
her name's patty.
yeah she worked on the anti-metahuman task force at the ccpd and i'm the scientific advisor
some jackass had kidnapped her and we had no clues so i just cheated a little.

yeah i'm okay.
not a big fan of this place just dragging out my dirty laundry like this
but what are you gonna do
¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[ The fact that he's calling his powers 'dirty laundry' is a bit telling. ]

I don't think using anything at your disposal to find a missing person counts as cheating.

Look, you don't have to answer this, but is there a reason you want to keep it so quiet?

you're right
i knew it was a risk, using my powers like that. it was enough for one of my friends to figure out i must be a meta.
but it was worth it cuz we got her home safe

[ The whole 'why' question is complicated. Tony deserves a non-bullshit answer, but a lot of it would be hard enough to explain to anyone, and he definitely doesn't want to get into it with Tony, who he's kind of starting to look up to, a bit. ]

it's not one big reason. more like a bunch of medium-sized ones.
some of them are just personal stuff.
"somebody made me this way without my permission" etc.

some of them are practical tho.
i've gotten held captive before by people who made me build them tech. i wanna try to avoid that happening again with anybody who might want to use my powers to get information.
i know it sounds paranoid but i just figure the less people who know the better.

Edited 2017-10-12 19:47 (UTC)

No, look, I get it.

[Oh boy, does he get some of it.]

You do you. There's just something to be said for owning yourself, that's all.

yeah.
i agree. and i wanna get there.
i guess i just have a little further to go before the powers feel like part of who i am and not like something that's been done to me.
if that makes any sense at all.

[ Tony has given him some good advice before, and Cisco values his words. He thinks Tony has a point. Cisco tends towards secrecy, but Tony is the opposite - no hidden identity, none of that. And there's something admirable about that.

And there's one small silver lining to all this. If Tony knows about his powers, now, that means Cisco can tell him... ]

so you know those goggles i told you about? the lucid dreaming ones?
i was lying a bit. they're not actually for lucid dreaming. well, you could use them that way but they're mostly to help me start to control my powers.
when i've got them on they stimulate the fear centers in my brain
(cuz the trigger for my visions is basically a combo of neurotransmitters that happens when i'm scared shitless)
and i'm still making adjustments but they're helping me to be in control of what i see, a little.
which is way better than the alternative

It does. I don't have abilities or anything but something that was done to met let me have the armor. So I get that. But if I could offer any advice, it won't feel like part of you until you MAKE it yours.

[He can at least offer that much, even if it isn't stuff he usually likes talking about. But there are reasons he never made any attempt to hide the reactor, when he had it.]

It only triggers when you're scared? Damn.

So if you trigger it yourself it becomes easier to control?

i'll keep that in mind.

[ Which may sound like a brush-off, but Cisco takes the words to heart. He knows that Tony has been Through Some Stuff, that he'd come out the other side of it a hero. If there's anyone whose advice he is likely to really listen to, it's his. And he thinks, maybe, Tony is right about this. That it's on him to push through and just... find a way to own his powers, and stop letting Eobard control him even from beyond the grave. ]

for now anyway
it's... theoretically possible that once i have enough practice i'll be able to access my powers without needing to set the mood by flinging myself headfirst towards a panic attack
but for now that's the way it's gotta be

i'm still trying to figure out how NOT to vibe, too
like when i'm in a dangerous situation and the adrenaline levels are high
not really a great idea to uncontrollably zone out from time to time
(that's happened, before. nearly got stepped on by a fifteen foot tall atomic dude. not great!!!)

Oddly enough, I too have experience with multi-story people.

But I can see how zoning out wouldn't be helpful. Neurology isn't my strongest suit, but I have some experience with tech there. If you want an extra set of eyes.

oh really?
was yours also a guy who absorbed all the ambient radiation for a few square miles & suddenly got enormous?

i might take you up on that if you don't mind
could be something really obvious i'm missing
hard to see the forest when you're uncomfortably close to the trees, etc.

that's how it was with figuring out the trigger
i thought they were just random & couldn't figure out a pattern
then about 20 seconds after i told the first person i told he suggested a fear response
you'd think it would be obvious and yet...

I would assume not, but I will admit that I didn't get the full story on him. Usually he made himself tiny, the growing thing was new.

Sure. Feel free to send over what you've got whenever.

And what's your stance on coming over so I can scan your head?

that's some alice in wonderland bs right there.
was it a tech thing or a powers thing?

[ It's not Tony's fault, really, that that question sets off a dozen different alarm bells in Cisco's head. It's been a rough month, what with the memories exposing all these secrets, and Eobard's ghost stalking him, and all of it has cranked the paranoia up to 11. Even though Tony is someone Cisco likes, a lot, that doesn't change matters one bit. In fact, if anything, the fact that he admires Tony, looks up to him, makes him even more inclined to be cautious. ]

my stance depends.
scan with what?
did you mean at your workshop?
when?
can i bring somebody with me?

Tech, presumably. Or at least some kind of science. We weren't exactly in a position to chat.

Scan with JARVIS. Basically just a less clangy MRI. Bring whoever you want, long as they're not going to get bored and knock over Dum-E or anything.

that's fair.

[ Cisco relaxes a little, at that. He'd liked JARVIS. JARVIS had been funny, and sharp, and interesting. And it explains why Tony would want Cisco to come to him. ]

then sure.
i'll bring eddie. he's very well behaved, i promise.

...and thank you.

[open] cast an illusion

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