[Semi-Open] No one can blame you for walking away

[livingsymbol]

who: Steve Rogers (616) and whoever wants to join him
what: Missing Loki and looking for distractions
when: backdated from June 6th to around June 15th
where: Around and about
warnings: Beware. There might be a feeling.



i. via the devices; text; closed to previous CR

[He makes it about a day before he starts getting restless. Not just because Loki is gone, but because he really doesn't have much to keep his mind off of the fact. Normally, he'd just bury himself in a mission or find other companionship, but for some reason that's just not appealing. So he tries to find other means of distraction. For those he knows hold odd hours, it might be well past dusk when he sends a message.]

Are you busy?

ii. OPEN; Well, that was the entire plan.

[He really should have come up with a better plan for filling his time. After spending days doing between work, the gym, and long runs around the Quarantine, even Steve is out of ideas for what to do with himself. He considers a trip out beyond the fence, but ultimately gives it up, because he doesn't want to spend too much time away from the city. He tries relaxing in the park or by the riverbank, sketching out scenes in the hope that the peace will just come to him.

So people who happen by will see one frustrated blond tearing a page out of his sketchbook, crumpling up the half-done work and throwing it down with an annoyed grunt. The paper ball joins a collection around his feet as Steve lowers his head in frustration and then lies back where he's been sitting.]

Come on, focus.

iii. OPEN; Everything is totally under control

[Later in the week, it's starting to bleed into his performance. While he's with the Guard or on his own patrol, Steve manages to somehow trip up and fall short on his usually flawless coordination. He's distracted, and during training or some other run he manages to stumble, missing leaps or punches and eventually ending up on the ground. His pride is injured more than his body, but that's suffering a bit too. He gets back up with a grumble of protest to those around him, waving any offer of help away.]

I'm fine. Just a bruise. Let me go again.

Comments

[anotheroldsoldier]

[Bucky breathes out a soft laugh, noticing the way Steve hovers a little. It's pretty typical Steve to try and put the focus on someone else when something is bothering him.]

Nothin' new. [Considering they practically live in each other's back pockets, he's got nothing. Really, he's doing alright, minus the occasional bout of sleeplessness.] Maybe whatever's on your mind? We could talk about that. [It comes out casual, almost light. He doesn't want to make a big deal and push Steve to the point he digs in his heels about not talking.]

Or we could go do somethin'. Hit the diner, or go for a ride.

[livingsymbol]

[Sometimes it happens without any thought at all. As much as Steve may be an excellent tactician, his awareness of his own problems always comes as a surprise. Even after all this time, he's subconsciously seeking answers by looking elsewhere, missing the whole point of addressing anything.]

I don't really have anything pressing at the moment.

[It's not entirely a lie. To him, everything is resolved. He agreed to it and he should be fine.]

Maybe... It would be nice to get out for a little.

[His gaze drifts to the city and then up to the sky.]

Lot of stars out.

[anotheroldsoldier]

[Bucky steps a little closer, sipping his coffee, bumping his shoulder idly into Steve's - a gesture of affection. He's not really aware that Loki's left, so he's trying to figure it out in his head, what might be bothering Steve. Clearly something is.]

Doesn't have to be pressing to want to get something off your chest. [He points out, but he leans against the half-wall that borders their roof area and looks up.]

Lot more stars outside the city. We could get something to go, ride out past the fences. I don't have patrol in the morning.

[livingsymbol]

[Steve presses back against him, finding comfort in the weight and the grounding contact of another person. Bucky is always there, always reliable, and this just emphasizes how much the man means to him. He wouldn't have really gotten through most of his life without support.

It doesn't have to be world-ending. That's something he doesn't always tell himself. Steve is so caught up in what is really important that he forgets to step back, telling himself that he'll have time later. He sighs heavily, letting the words sink in.]

Mm. Have you ever thought about going somewhere else?

[anotheroldsoldier]

[Bucky pushes back into that contact just a little harder, skin warming beneath clothes where their bodies press together. It's comfortable contact, familiar. Steve is always his rock in a stormy sea - Bucky only wants to be the same for him, someone to turn to when he's hurting. They're family, the two of them, even more so than the rest of the Avengers.

He leans against Steve, looks up at his face, searching his expression for a hint of what's making the gears turn in his brain right now.]

Somewhere else? Like where?

[livingsymbol]

Somewhere else. Maybe another world... I don't really know.

[It's a half-formed thought, something completely foreign to Steve, who has only ever really wanted to go home. The idea of comfort and familiarity have been uprooted and tossed so many times that he's not sure he's happy with them anymore, but he hasn't found anything to act as a replacement, either. But now he's starting to realize that maybe, somehow, he can look for something without completely going against the oath he's lived by for so long.

And, yes, part of him is chasing after Loki because he can't physically do so, but it's more than that.]

We're on a moon. Things aren't perfect, but they're pretty good. Maybe somewhere else they aren't as good. We could see.

[anotheroldsoldier]

Didn't peg you as the world-hopping type. [Bucky says mildly, trying to mentally unpack that sentence. It's a little worrying, the thought that Steve might want to leave Riverview, that he might want to go somewhere else, but that's selfish. Bucky knows it's selfish to be scared of that. He pushes it aside, mouth pressed into a line for a moment, staring out over the city.]

I don't... I haven't thought about leaving, I guess. At least, not for a while. I promised myself I'd wait until Yuri was back where he belongs before I'd think about going anywhere. [In a way, he feels responsible for the kid.]

Are you thinkin' about leaving? [It comes out as neutral as he can manage, because he never wants to be holding Steve back from whatever he might actually want.]