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riverviewlogs2018-03-01 09:54 pm
- !mod post: holiday,
- !mod post: monthly mingle,
- almost human: dorian,
- dc comics (rebirth): wally west,
- dragon age: dorian pavus,
- legend of zelda (botw): zelda,
- marvel (616): billy kaplan,
- marvel (616): bucky barnes,
- marvel (616): steve rogers,
- marvel (mcu): tony stark,
- marvel (mcu): wanda maximoff,
- once upon a time: victor frankenstein,
- original: aeacinos ixocia,
- original: shigeru miyata,
- rivers of london: peter grant,
- star trek (aos): james kirk,
- star wars: cassian andor,
- star wars: finn,
- star wars: jyn erso,
- star wars: poe dameron,
- stargate atlantis: john sheppard,
- the black tapes: alex reagan,
- voltron: keith,
- voltron: shiro,
- ✖ chb chronicles: nico di angelo,
- ✖ chb chronicles: piper mclean,
- ✖ dctv (flash): cisco ramon,
- ✖ dctv (flash): eddie thawne,
- ✖ fullmetal alchemist (manga): roy musta,
- ✖ inception: ariadne,
- ✖ inception: eames,
- ✖ legend of zelda (botw): link,
- ✖ marvel (mcu): valkyrie,
- ✖ marvel (tv): john proudstar,
- ✖ mutant x: shalimar fox,
- ✖ once upon a time: jefferson,
- ✖ original: christian fischer,
- ✖ original: freya vaughn,
- ✖ osomatsu-san: karamatsu matsuno,
- ✖ osomatsu-san: osomatsu matsuno,
- ✖ persona 5: makoto niijima,
- ✖ shadowhunter chronicles: alec lightwoo,
- ✖ shadowhunter chronicles: clary fray,
- ✖ star wars: bodhi rook,
- ✖ star wars: kylo ren,
- ✖ stargate atlantis: carson beckett,
- ✖ stargate atlantis: rodney mckay,
- ✖ the finder: willa monday,
- ✖ the raven cycle: blue sargent,
- ✖ vikings: ivar ragnarsson
monthly mingle: SAMPREMI
what: monthly mingle: sampremi
when: The month of March.
where: Anywhere around the city.
warnings: there will likely be nsfw content; please put any necessary warnings in the subject lines
In the days leading up to March 1st, residents new and old will notice preparations beginning, a flurry of activity getting the city ready for the upcoming celebration: Sampremi. This is one of Riverview's four yearly celebrations of love, this one focused on sexual love and lust, and sexual relationships that might bloom into more (or not). Traditions associated with Sampremi are a roving street market, raves where residents can seek out some free love and get a little crazy, a massive week-long kink convention, and a tech expo with all-ages and adult options.
Riverview has always been a place focused on love and building connections in order to foster community, and for a lot of people, sex is part of that, which makes it something worth celebrating! For people who use sex as a way to connect with others, even if only for a short time, or those who use it as a way to connect on a deeper level with the ones they already love, Sampremi is the perfect holiday to get their freak on in a host of new and exciting or comfortable and familiar ways. The holiday features a large kink convention, where various entities in the city can show off their toys, explain their niche kinks, and share their insights with anyone who might be interested, a series of raves that are both all-ages and adult where residents can find someone(s) to share a night (or a week, a few months, or even a life) with. This year, there is a large tech expo where cutting edge tech companies in the city are sharing their newest toys, like improved virtual reality, robotics advances, and many other types of toys - all for work, play, or, in the spirit of the holiday, pleasure. And for those who don't want to connect through sex or who aren't old enough to, there are dances, games, and an entire market full of street food that's meant for sharing, so they can connect in other ways.
● OOC NOTE: Please be sure to warn in subject lines for any threads involving sexual content, drug use or other content that fellow players may wish to avoid, and do not use the prompt mechanics to circumvent consent in your threads, as non-consensual sex is not permitted on the game communities. Items such as aphrodisiacs, VR, or party drugs mentioned in the prompts are intended to facilitate consensual sex, not to encourage sexual assault, or to 'trick' characters into having sex that they would not normally have. ICly, please remember that there is always security to intervene and make sure everyone is safe.
i. color raves
Advertised on flyers and digital screens around the city, made to pop as if they were under blacklight, is a series of what's called "color raves" that are happening in various large empty warehouse spaces around the city. They are called color raves for the bright colorful lights, the preponderance of glowsticks that attendees wave around, and for the brightly colored powder for attendees to play with, some of which is spiked with a mild party drug and some of which is just for fun (with the difference clearly marked, of course). There are three types of color rave - adult, all-ages, and youth raves.
(CW: DRUG USE) At each adult rave and all-ages rave there is one specific room where attendees can enter (after proving themselves 18+), and dance or play tag with brightly colored powder that contains small amounts of a legal party drug commonly available in Riverview, which is absorbed through the skin. Not much more intoxicating than having a few beers, the effects of the drug are a pleasant low-key buzzing euphoria, positive sensitivity to touch, a heightening of desires for intimacy, and a mild lowering of inhibitions. Once a character has been hit with the powder, the color lingers on the skin so other attendees can know who has partaken, but once the powder makes contact with a surface (whether it is skin, clothing, or structural) it deactivates, meaning that partakers can safely dance with non-partakers without sharing the intoxicating effects.
Adult raves will have bouncers at the door to ensure that anyone entering is 18+, and there is no limit to when and where the debauchery happens. Clothing is optional, showing skin is encouraged, and there are a lot of neatly tucked away spaces for attendees to get some time alone with one or more than one person, as well as spaces intended for orgies. The atmosphere is sex-positive and non-judgemental, open to any orientation or preference, with various forms of protection available for free, however, to ensure that everyone plays safe there are sober security teams out en masse at all premises to oversee the events.
All-ages raves are open to anyone who wishes to attend, regardless of age. There are bouncers at the door who will check ID and stamp the hand of anyone who is 18+ with a special ink that shows up under blacklight for easy identification. At all-ages raves, 18+ and underage characters can mingle, but there are specific areas set aside for only 18+ characters where they can get down and dirty either in private or the open.
Adult and all-ages raves will have only spiked powder to avoid confusion.
Youth raves are intended only for younger characters under 18, so they can stay up all night and dance like crazy, and meet other young people in the city. The legal drinking age in Riverview Quarantine is 14, and so anyone over 14 can enter and indulge in a few drinks, dancing, and playing tag with a version of the colored powder featured at the adult raves that won't give you anything but a sugar high. There is copious amounts of security on site to ensure that everyone is safe, as well as nurses and off-duty police officers to offer advice or care for anyone who overindulges out of lack of experience. Youth raves will have only sugar powder, brightly colored and sweet to the taste, meant for fun and to play tag with rather than to cause intoxication.
ii. kink convention
For the week of March 4-10 there will be a massive kink convention on the top floor of one of the large exhibition centers downtown, limited to characters 18+. The exhibition is a sexy adult informational convention featuring various kinks and fetishes. Whether you're into leather, latex, lace, or anything else, you'll be able to find the clothes, toys, guides, books, erotica, fiction, and a wide variety of other interesting stuff to explore. While the atmosphere is sex-positive and there are private and public (for the voyeurs and exhibitionists in the room) venues for having sex, it's definitely focused on exploration and information about different stuff to try.
If someone has thought of it and figured it sounded sexy, it can be found here, and with Riverview's high level of tech advancement and widespread acceptance of magic, things can get pretty kinky. Whatever your kink is, there's probably a VR program, sex toy, potion, or spell that can make it happen, and someone who's got the downlow on how to make it great.
iii. tech expo
Riverview prides itself on its technological advancement, and so, running concurrently with the Kink Convention on March 4-10 and on the bottom floor of the same convention center, various cutting-edge tech companies in the city will be sponsoring a Tech Expo. The expo features demonstrations of all of the most advanced technology that's coming into use in the city, ranging from advancements in VR and holotech to robotics and gadgets, you can find the latest and greatest in almost any area of modern technology. Attendees will be able to come with a friend or a date or anything in between to play VR games, enjoy holoprojected escape rooms and puzzles, meet robot pets, try out the most recent music player or that new cell phone that can bend without breaking, and a wide variety of other gadgets.
While most of the tech expo is all-ages and non-sexual, there is a decently-sized adult area where characters must show ID proving they are 18+ in order to enter, where the technology is mostly related to sexual use. This area features advanced sex toys, VR systems intended to explore sex with other people in a virtual environment with no strings attached, sexy video games and holoprograms, and many other sensual technological.
iv. street market
One of the major draws of the festival is the special street food that can only be obtained this time of year. Almost everything you can buy at the Sampremi Festival is meant to be shared - whether it's one piece of meat on two or more sticks or desserts baked with a narrow part in the middle for convenient tearing, everything is built to be shared. The stalls sell everything from cups of soup, sandwiches, roasted or fried meat, deep-fried vegetables and cakes, dumplings, donuts, bagels, turnovers, and anything else you can think of.
Many of the savory dishes are based on the meat of a particular fowl native to the moon Riverview is situated on that has a taste and texture halfway between chicken and duck, cooked to be spicy (ranging from very mild to throat-burning). Many of the desserts are based around a fruit native to the moon that is spherical, red-orange, and has a light sweet taste that is similar to a combination of mango, pineapple, and strawberry. Both ingredients are considered to be aphrodisiacs. Of course, the foods aren't actually aphrodisiacs and any effect is purely placebo, though there are some booths (clearly marked and with someone to check ID) that sell actual aphrodisiac-laced foods and drinks to people who are 18+.
The festival features an entire row of fair games ranging from very high-tech games featuring virtual reality and neon holograms to extremely old-fashioned games with darts and balloons or balls and glasses. The games all have prizes in various shapes and sizes, with the standard stuffed animals, but also with goods and special items donated by any business in the city; ranging from tiny prizes to huge and expensive ones. Due to the nature of the holiday, many of the stalls are set up to cater to winning a prize for your partner(s), and due to the nature of the Quarantine, a lot of them involve aiming or other aspects of pretending to fight.
Originally, the part of the street festival that involved an actual market, with stalls and booths set up with goods, was aimed primarily at romantic trinkets like flowers or jewelry, gifts intended to be purchased for a loved one. As time has gone by, however, this aspect of the market has increased, with many businesses participating, though the emphasis is still on small businesses and anything relating to local culture rather than booths for any of the larger more corporate businesses. There is still plenty of jewelry to be found, for sure, mostly handmade and artisan, but the scope of the Market has widened immeasurably. The Sampremi Market is an excellent place to find specialty foods, clothing, jewelry, art, or other goods that were originally native to cultures on other planets in this reality, or other realities altogether. Many residents in the city use the market to share their unique cultural goods and traditional dress with others.
v. roommates or wildcard
Feel free to use this prompt to meet new roommates, for the purpose of getting to know each other, or hit up the mod-posted prompt to create a Communal Housing floor mingle. Or, if you have an idea for a prompt that isn't in this list, set during Sampremi, feel free to write it up!
Credit: image i: saber XU; image ii: Jose Borges; image iii: Nicolas Sitbon; image iv: Andreas Rocha
V.
Which is why John is walking into the infirmary, by himself, with a damp cloth held over his eyes. Chyler had thrown a flash-bang, which bounced off Finn's back when he lagged behind to return cover fire, and landed directly at John's feet as he was uncloaking the shuttle, exploding in front of his eyes.
They made the trip home on auto-pilot, Chyler taking over the controls with John's direction when they came in for the landing. John told them his vision was just spotting, that he could see, but had one hell of a headache, and waited for them to leave before feeling his way out of the cockpit.
It was a lie, for Chyler's sake. John knows she'll be beating herself up already.
He can't see. He can barely open his eyes, they're so sensitized. Any light hurts.
For better or worse, John's been to the infirmary so many times that he knows the route by memory, and doesn't need his vision to get there. He stumbles through the door, waits patiently in the waiting area until he's ready to be seen. He'd be reading a magazine if his eyes were working.
It's just temporary. That's what he's telling himself to keep the panic at bay, but it's still there, bubbling just below the surface. When he sits on the edge of the exam table, he's kicking his legs, smiling, but his heart is going a mile a minute.]
Flashbang.
no subject
Patience. Rodney will tell John, John will come find him. That's how these things go.
Except then he walks into the exam area and there John is, kicking his feet like an impatient wain, and it's so good to see him that Carson stops where he is for a moment. Rodney and John. He's not alone.
Things will be all right.
Carson doesn't stop to think that maybe Rodney hasn't told John he's there yet. The coincidence would be a bit much, really, wouldn't it? So he shifts straight to doctor mode when John says flashbang, drawing out his penlight and flicking the beam against one pupil, then the other. ]
Pupils responsive, which I'm sure you know by now is a good sign.
[ John is upset. Carson can tell. He's good at wearing that calm face, too good at it in fact, but he's nervous and hiding it by being cavalier. It's amazing how many military men seem to think that works.
He pulls the ophthalmoscope from a pocket and lines himself up to get a look at one of John's retinas. ]
I would say it's good to see you, but that might be a wee bit insensitive given the circumstances. Eyes open wide, please.
no subject
The medical team in this place aren't bad people. They've taken care of John before, when he would let them, but they're not Carson. He won't take their pills unless they're antibiotics, and there's no pharmacy equivalent he can buy for himself. The rest he holds under his tongue and spits out later. The bottles go in the trash, or lay untouched in the bottom of his bedside drawer. John doesn't dislike them. He just doesn't trust them.]
Are you Scottish?
[He sounds so much like him. John steels his gut against a wave of nausea that has nothing to do with the flashbang. He's not equipped to deal with this right now, so he does his best to ignore it.
John flinches into the light. It hurts, shining into his eyes beacon through an already blindingly bright fog. He tries to force his eyes open wider, but only succeeds in furrowing his brow, still squinting. His head hurts like hell, knives behind his eyes, and hammers pounding away at his temples.]
How long until I can see?
no subject
No retinal damage. How long has it been?
[ Carson straightens up and goes to wet a cloth in the nearby sink, squeezing the water out of it until it's cold and very lightly damp. ] Lay back, if you please. Not much to be done but wait it out, so you might as well get comfortable.
no subject
[Did he even say that? Is he imagining it? His ears are still ringing, and it doesn't make any sense. John won't let it. It's too much. John is not dealing with this today. Can't. He has enough on his plate already.
First, there's the eyes. Being blind is inconvenient, physically, mentally, emotionally. Speaking to Chyler won't be easy, either, and making their reports line up will be even harder. She'll want to tell the truth, and John's not going to let her. He's not going to let her throw her potential career under a bus for a flashbang, even if he knows it's what she thinks she deserves.
He pushes clumsily at the doctor's hands when he comes near, already sliding off the edge of the examination table. Booted feet hitting the floor.]
Listen, doc, I appreciate the help, but if I'm just gonna wait this out? I can do that by myself, in the comfort of my own home. Write me a prescription for a cab.
[Standing is hard. He's lost his orientation. He shakes his head, which doesn't do anything other than make it hurt, and grimaces. Away from the doctor, always away, or at least what feels like away.]
Please and thanks.
no subject
[ Okay, maybe Rodney hasn't told John. Because the man is certainly acting like he did when they first arrived in Atlantis, before Carson broke him to bridle. Or before John let himself be broken to bridle, more like. ]
And you're going to do your waiting here, so I can make sure your vision clears up properly. I'll just let you run into a few walls in the mean time, shall I?
[ Carson reaches out to put his hand on John's shoulder, gentle in spite of his crisp tone. ] It's me, son. Now would you please sit down.
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[John doesn't know who he's saying not to, Carson's ghost, or the doctor. He tries to put distance between them, feeling his way around the edge of the examination table.
Then there's that voice. It cuts through everything. Stops John in his tracks. He jerks back from the hand on his shoulder, spooked, and his face changes. Goes dark. Lips peeling back from his teeth in the first warning of a snarl.
It's me, son.
John's eyes widen. Narrow. He still can't see. Still doesn't believe.
He reaches out, raking dirty, gloved fingers over the doctor's face. Feels over strong nose to full, bristled cheeks.
His eyes widen again, rounding, glossy beneath the fluorescent lights.]
Carson?
no subject
Normally the expression makes Carson feel safer, like there's an immovable object between him and the worst possible outcome. Normally it's not aimed in his general direction.
It's a relief, almost, when John's hands start exploring his face. The act is strangely heartbreaking too. John isn't meant to be helpless. It doesn't suit him in the least.
Carson keeps his voice even and gentle. ]
Last I checked.
no subject
[John's hands fall away from Carson's face. He doesn't know what to do with them, doesn't know what to do with himself, so he crosses his arms over his chest. Grips onto his own biceps tightly. Stabilizes himself.
He keeps trying to blink the blindness away. As if he can will himself back into seeing, if he tries hard enough. The frustration is evident in scrunch of his brow and flexing jaw.
John isn't meant to be helpless. He doesn't know how. Nothing and no one can keep him down anymore. He sleeps when he has to. Eats when not eating is detrimental to his strength. He's always in rough shape these days. Bruises on top of bruises. Bones half mended. Old wounds only old because there are newer. So many fresh scars he's lost track. There's never time to heal between battles, and so he stopped wasting his time trying.
Riverview isn't Atlantis, John knows that, but he's still at war.
Mostly with himself.
John tries to keep the anger out of his voice, and crush down the fear threatening to make him come apart. Tries to ignore the hurt, like he ignores every other hurt since Carson died, because he longer feels worthy of medical care.]
No one told me.
no subject
Two days past. Long enough to get situated and report for duty as it were. Silly me, I was so disorientated that I didn't even think to ask if anyone from home was here. Thought I was alone. No idea how I would get back, heaven help me.
[ He applies gente pressure to John's arm, guiding him back the few paces to the examination table. ]
Up you get, then. You'll imagine my surprise when Rodney-- [ Exasperation, fondness, a touch of resignation. ] --comes bulling in this morning fit to burst because of a bitty little splinter. Lay down now, would you please?
no subject
[John's nostrils flare. Angry is an understatement. He's livid.
Carson shouldn't have been alone for two days. John should have known, somehow. Found him. Anything could have happened to him in that time. Riverview isn't in a constant state of DEFCON 1 like Atlantis, but the city is dangerous in its own way. The conditions are strange and unpredictable, even moreso than they're used to, and their enemies are unknown. Above all that, John has little to no power here. Zero control over anything that happens. This proves it.
He lies back against the table, stiff, but obedient. Still processing.
Rodney knew. That makes John's blood boil. He has to close his eyes, swallow hard, and fight down the urge to call him and chew him out, right here, right now. He doesn't need his eyes to use a phone.
He forces himself to breathe. This morning he was out on a mission, far from the city, into the dead zone, and Rodney had no way of contacting him other than by emergency radio.
John grips onto either side of the examination table, white knuckled.]
Sounds like you've been busy, doc.
no subject
John spends more time in the infirmary than most commanding officers on Atlantis, and most of it is for the sake of his subordinates. ]
Two days, which I navigated well enough, no fear.
[ Can't do a weight--which has gone down, if Carson is any judge--while John's laying on the table, and he'd rather not have the man get up again. But he can at least...
Carson moves away from John's side for a moment, retrieving the damp cloth. He hangs that over his wrist and gets a glass of water before going to a cabinet of boxed pills and finding what he needs.
He turns John's hand over to press the pills into it, then reaches across the table to nudge John's other hand with the cup. ] For the headache. No fussing, and you best show me you've taken them.
[ They'll help with the headache. They'll also hopefully make him too tired to hold on to his temper. Carson's unnerved, as much as he's hiding it. John has a temper, he surely does. He doesn't lose his temper, which he seems just about ready to do. ]
Not terribly. It's all been rather mundane, except where it isn't at all. [ He folds the cloth into a strip, waiting for John to take the pills before he'll smooth it over the man's forehead and eyes.
Rodney and John are acting strangely. Both of them, powerfully so. Keeping his voice as calm and casual as he knows how: ] Rodney asked me what the last thing I remembered was. Found that an odd question, and no mistake.
no subject
[It's Carson, alright. The iron first in a surgical glove. He strong-arms John like no one else can, or even dares to try, and it's the softness of his grip that always forces John to submit in the end.
The sentimental Scottish sleeper hold.
John glares at him, or in the direction of him, at the very least, but closes his fingers around the water and pills. Of course Carson knows all of John's tricks. He knows everyones tricks.
John pops the pills, washes them down, crinkles the cup, and sticks his tongue out for Carson's approval. He did swallow them, this time. Chances are he'll throw them up later anyway. John's more likely to purge than cry. Emotions never did sit well on his stomach. It's probable he's lost weight since they've last since each other, whenever that was. Time's gone both too slowly and impossibly fast since losing Carson and finding him again.
John draws both booted feet up onto the table, arching his back. As if it physically pains him to lie still for longer than a minute. It does.]
And what was the last thing you remembered?
no subject
[ He rests a hand on John's ankle, wanting to tell the man to lie still or roll over so Carson can take a look at his back. What he wouldn't give for one of Atlantis's scanners right about now. He wants to sit John and Rodney both down and examine every inch of them, scratch every possible known malady off the list. Make sure they're still as hale and whole as any member of Atlantis's team can be. ]
Said something I only half understood about the things this place does with time. What is it? What happened? Is it Michael?
[ That's the one thing he can think of for which he, among all of them, bears responsibility. He made Michael. His virus made Michael, and facilitated every monstrous thing that happened after. He never should have created it. From the Wraith girl on that planet to Michael and his people at the encampment, it was a mistake, an ugly mistake that only gets more twisted the longer it's allowed to exist.
He wanted to help. He just wanted to help.
So did Perna. He'd warned her then and she hadn't listened. None of them had. And then he turned around and ignored his own advice. War, he thinks tiredly. War shifts ethical boundaries, destroys moral landmarks, until a person finds himself standing in a foreign country of his own design. ]
Whatever it is, John, I'd rather know than speculate.
no subject
He’s not just Carson Beckett, he’s the original Carson Beckett. The Carson Beckett he lost. The Carson Beckett who was a charred corpse the last time John saw him. He remembers closing Carson’s eyes, frozen wide with shock. He remembers the smell of burnt flesh. He remembers the impossibly heavy weight of his coffin on his shoulder as they carried him through the gate to Earth for his mother to bury him. He remembers not crying, just fracturing inside, too deep for even the Ancient’s technology to repair.
John is glad for the damp cloth over his eyes. He clamps a hand over it, wetness leaking down the sides of his face.
He’s so tired. He doesn’t have the strength for this. This is a conversation for Teyla, or-
Elizabeth. Carson won’t know about her, either. He won’t know the climbing death-toll of the retrovirus and the Wraith’s dogged extermination of every human carrying it, or how Michael, the monster of their own making, is the greatest threat to Atlantis since the Replicators.
John can’t speak right away. His voice and breath are locked in his chest. If he didn’t force himself to inhale and exhale, he would suffocate. He considers letting himself pass out, if only to avoid this conversation, but knows realistically it’ll still be waiting for him when he wakes up.
Better him than Rodney. He took Carson’s death the worst out of everyone. They were best friends. He shouldn’t have to be the one to do this. John forces himself out of his fear, finds his voice, and does what needs to be done.
He owes it to Carson.]
You died, Carson. Two years ago. You sacrificed yourself to save a patient, and you died.
no subject
Elizabeth, he thinks suddenly. Oh God, it can't be Elizabeth--
You died, Carson.
His turn for stillness and silence. He stares at John, at that tracery of tears that escapes the cloth over the man's face. ]
What?
[ Is that his voice? It's so small.
He feels like he's been struck by lightning, empty as sand turned to glass.
In the background of his own mind he's already running through the possibilities, the reasons he wouldn't have known, the effect of trauma on the mind, and from there all the reasons this is impossible. Impossible.
Impossible.
There's a pleading note in Carson's voice when he says: ] John.
[ Like John can fix this, like all he has to do is say it isn't true. John's upset alone says this isn't a lie. Carson backs up a step, needing to sit, hitting the side of the next exam table and gripping its edges hard. He has to know. He has to know if he at least-- ]
The patient?
no subject
John's still blind, but he doesn't need to see Carson's face to imagine it. He looks at Carson with unseeing eyes, trying to appear strong, even though he's close to crumbling.
One thing at a time. Elizabeth, Michael, and everything else can come later.]
He lived.
[Of course Carson asks after the patient. That's who he is, and why everyone who meets him loves him. Losing him left a permanent hole in Atlantis, bigger than most. With his loss, Atlantis started taking on water. After Elizabeth, it nearly sunk. John doesn't know how they've kept it afloat this long without them. He can barely keep his own head above water. He tries his best to hold onto everyone, but there are waves, and they're so much bigger than him. John is never enough.
Now it's just the three of them, and John won't let anything happen to Rodney, or Carson, ever again. He will watch them. He will protect them. He will die for them, if dying is what it takes.
He reaches out for Carson's arm, gripping firmly when he makes contact. With all he has in him. With all the strength he doesn't have, but always finds, for the people he loves.]
You were a hero.
no subject
[ The words come out without force. Carson swallows and tries again, straightening in John's grip even as he retreats into the safety of his profession. He has a patient. That's the priority. It's what he knows how to handle. ] You should be laying down, Colonel. John.
no subject
[John’s lip quirks up at the corner. As close to a smile as he can manage, considering the circumstances. Tonight, maybe, when both Rodney and Carson are within eyesight, providing John can see, he’ll allow himself to feel something close to joy.
He squeezes Carson’s arm once and lets go. To comfort him, and to confirm once more that he’s real. Flesh and blood. John can still hardly believe it. What if all of this is just a fever dream? That would be too cruel. John wasn’t as close with him as Rodney, but they were friends, and Carson might just be the best man he’s ever known. He didn’t deserve to die. It should have been John. It always should have been him. If they hadn’t lost Carson, maybe he would’ve been able to save Elizabeth.
This is the second chance Carson deserves.]
Do we have a deal?
no subject
He nods, this time, then remembers John actually can't see him. ]
Aye. All right. Yes, that would be best, I think.
no subject
[They've got a lot of catching up to do. Good and bad.
Carson can stay in John's bed until they find a bigger place. John can take the couch, or Rodney's bed if he's not there. If John sleeps. He'll have to tell Poe he won't be staying over this week.
John lays back obediently. He won't relax, but he'll stay still. Closing his eyes, he starts thinking about the logistics of this. What it means. The precautions they'll need to take, until John's certain Carson won't blip out of existence again. He'll get Rodney to look into that. The two of them will need to sit down and have a little chat about what they will and won't tell Carson first.
No to Elizabeth. Yes to Teyla's baby. Yes to Jennifer. No to Michael, and the spread of the retrovirus- John winces, his head is still throbbing.]
When can we leave?
no subject
[ Carson can't tell if his voice sounds normal or not. It feels distant in his own ears, even though he's trying so hard to stay steady.
You died, he thinks, and it doesn't feel real, it feels objectively wrong.
You died, he thinks again, and those tears on John's face won't leave his mind. The desperation in Rodney's embrace. ]
I might-- No, I shouldn't.
[ He can't call for his second to take over on his first full day in the infirmary. Carson pinches the bridge of his nose, trying to think.
You're no good to anyone like this, his more sensible self says. The part of himself that always sounds like the doctor. At best, you'll not give someone the care they deserve, at worst you'll miss something important. ]
Yes. I'll get my resident. Take you home myself. Where is home?
no subject
[John can hear the hesitation in Carson's voice. Same old Carson. Like most of Atlantis' core members, the doctor would rarely be found in his own quarters. The man practically lived in the infirmary. He certainly ate and slept there. Whether or not the slower, safer pace of Riverview will change those habits remains to be seen. John and Rodney's schedules haven't changed, even if their workload has.
He moves to sit up again, feeling around for support, his hand eventually landing on Carson's shoulder. Despite his soft personality, he's always been a brick shithouse of a man. Solid and stable. He's strong enough to hold lives in his hands. John's always admired that about him. John struggles, sometimes. No matter how hard he tries, it feels like his shoulders are never broad enough.
That said, John knows better than most that no one is strong enough to do everything on their own. Not even the irreplaceable Carson Beckett.
Maybe he's the one who needs to go home.]
You know what, I'm actually feeling kinda dizzy. You'll be more useful than Rodney if I pass out on the way home.
no subject
[ Never mind that Carson doesn't find that situation particularly likely to occur. It doesn't matter. John has given him a reasonable way out, and Carson doesn't think to question it. Not even to question how convenient it is. ]
Give me just a moment. And stay put!
[ Carson hunts down his resident, which doesn't take much effort. The young woman is still as unsure of him as he is of her, which means they've been sticking fairly close to each other. After explaining things, or half-explaining things, she seems more than willing to take over.
Back to John he goes. ]
There. Settled. [ He puts a hand on John's shoulder and leads him toward the door. ] One prescription for a cab, coming up.