riverviewlogs | [Open - Memory Share.]

Entry tags:

[Open - Memory Share.]

who: Edward Elric and Anyone Interested
what: Memory Share Event, First Person in the post, Dreamscape/Network in the comments
when: October 9th-23rd
where: Around the city for First Person, Dreamscapes and Network for the rest.
warnings: Individual Warnings Below
Notes: I've included some scenes that I have on Youtube for unrelated reasons if anyone wants those.

Characters may choose to contact Ed, bring it up next time they see him, or never mention it and just have that insight on a moment in his life without ever telling him they know. That's entirely up to player discretion.

(If you would like to use a scene from '03 that's not listed here or the subtitled version, I'm fine with that as well! Just let me know which scene so that I'm aware.)

1. Reunion of the Fallen (Short Reaction)
cw: assault

This can be broken down any way you'd like through the month but it might start with seeing the rock go flying and slam the first guy in the face out of nowhere.

The next flash is could be the second guy demanding, "who the hell are you?" This scene would be dark, as Ed's eyes are closed. You can't feel tossing the rock in your hand, but you're aware of the movements.

Third flash, you're speaking but it's Ed's voice. The scene is still black. "Come on, guys. A band of thugs in the forest, that's so cliché."

The same voice from before, "What was that short stuff?" In an instant you're up, kicking this guy straight in the face with the sole of your boot.

His group of friends descend to attack, the girl they were bothering previously already forgotten. Whether or not your character sees the off-screen pummeling is up to you and may also be a separate fourth vision at a later time.

2.Night of the Chimera's Cry (Faint)
cw: body horror, physical violence, body post murder, dark themes, children present

This one is very brief. There's a child in an alley crying out for his mother, military all around. Flashes may come in single second shots, broken up through the day or weeks, everything happens very fast.

"That makes five."

"Hasn't investigations found anything, yet?"

"Don't blame us."

One woman tries to remove the child from the cloth covered corpse in the alley, but he holds on. When she picks him up, he pulls the cloth with him, crying for his mother and screaming "No!" while revealing the body.

She's on her back, arms bent and covered in blood. You feel yourself gasp, and suddenly there are flashes of other memories. A distorted upside down face followed by a happy woman in a purple dress, smiling, sitting at a table, and then lying on the floor. The distorted image returns and you can see it struggling to breathe before everything goes dark.

In your mind you might feel yourself sinking to the ground as someone behind you shouts, "Ed! Pick him up!"

"Sir!" Then silence.

3. Hohenheim of Light (Father Issues)
cw: assault

From a distance there's a man and a woman sitting at a table on a porch of a large yellow house. The first flash may just be a visual of them, but as the scenes grow longer and more clear through the month you'll be able to piece together the conversation that's happening. Some characters may notice a resemblance between the man at the table and Ed.

"A long time ago I saw an eagle with wings as black as obsidian, your hair is the exact same color. I never thought I'd see it again. Thank you, for bringing such a beautiful memory back to me."

The woman at the table is blushing at the attention, "And thank you. What a lovely thing to say."

No time is wasted before you charge forward, "What the hell are you doing flirting?!" You launch into a punch, right hand nothing but glove-less metal, knocking the man straight off the porch to the ground below.

In case you didn't recognize the voice, the woman sitting there confirms that this is Ed's memory, "Edward, what the-?"

He's not listening, you feel and hear yourself shouting in Ed's voice.

"You're gone for over ten years, and I come back home to that?! Damn you, old man!"

4. Hohenheim of Light (Milk Rant)
cw: assault (probably best combined with 3.)

There's a man on the ground, presumably Ed's father if this memory is coupled with flashes of the previous one. He smiles up at Ed where you're standing on the porch, who seems aggravated at best.

"Edward," Your eyes widen in surprise at being addressed, before setting once more - still hostile. "So, do you still hate drinking milk?"

Immediately you jump off the porch, kicking him to the ground. "Who are you calling a micro-sized half pint who didn't grow up because he doesn't drink milk?!"

From behind, you hear three voices chime in "That's not what he said, Edward."

5. Arm Wrestling
cw free! Also available if anyone's interested, but I didn't write it up.

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[There are things from his own memories Ed definitely doesn't want out there, doesn't want seen by anyone - especially Al - but this is almost worse. When Alphonse shakes him back to the present he blinks once, refocusing on the room around them once more before glancing around. The quick flashes of memory throughout the month had been easy enough to dismiss, but this was all encompassing, there was no escaping it so easily, the sight, the full range of emotion, everything about it had been so complete and raw. He doesn't speak, looking at his brother slowly as if having just woken up despite the fact that they had both been in the middle of something when it had occurred. After a moment's hesitation, another blink before Ed's arm lifts, knocking Al's hand from his shoulder only to to reach forward tugging his brother into a tight embrace without so much as a word.]

[ the suddenness of the motion takes al by surprise more than finding his brother rooted in place. when it comes to touch, it's usually the younger elric who initiates, so to have ed so suddenly wrapping his arms around him automatically makes al tense. not because he doesn't like the feeling of his brother holding him. quite the opposite. it's the unknown reason that hovers in the air like something thick and sticky. al wants to know what's prompted the sudden hug, but he wraps his arms around ed anyway, returning the embrace with ease. ]

Brother? [ his voice is soft, careful, as if he's worried he might spook ed. ] What is it?

[His arms only tighten when Alphonse returns the hug, the tension in his body like a coiled snake. It's the sound of Al's voice that seems to make him realize he's been holding his breath and Ed exhales slowly, with no less desperation in the way he's gripping his brother. The fact that he has newfound context for the reason he chose to leave his brother doesn't make it any easier to know that he did it, in all actuality it only makes it that much more complicated a situation. Now he understands why he had to do it, and he hates that he had to make the decision at all. He can't bring himself to say it though, can't bring himself to tell Alphonse what it is that he saw from his brother's perspective when he'd only had the story to go on for so many years before learning how it happened himself. Years of hating himself for doing this and not knowing why he would ever choose anything over Al, all answered in one day. At the question he just shakes his head, he doesn't have the words, not yet - maybe he wouldn't, at all - to answer that question.]

[ it must be something important if his brother is gripping him so desperately, but with the way ed shakes his head, al figures his brother isn't quite ready to talk about it. he'll wait for ed. waited three years to find him, so he'll wait for ed to explain. and it's a little bit selfish of him, wanting to keep up this hold, this hug for as long as possible. he can feel his brother's warmth soak through his clothing, reach his own skin and he revels in it, not wanting to let go any more than ed does. ]

It's okay, Brother. I'm not going anywhere.

[ he press his mouth against ed's cheek, the shyest of kisses only meant to reassure ed, and squeezes lightly to ensure his brother knows he's there and not about to release him any time soon. ]

[It was Al's words that made his grip slacken, relaxing just enough not to be the coiled death grip with all the tension in the world. He doesn't say anything right away, just nods slowly as if still trying to process whatever it was he was so shaken up about. When he does speak, after some time has passed, it might be hard to tell if the break in his voice is from emotion or disuse.]

Sorry- Al...

[He swallows, not elaborating but not seeming entirely ready to let go yet, either.]

[ al has no idea what's troubling his brother. no idea why his brother is apologizing. his mind whirls, trying to figure out the reason, but can't come up with one. there are many times in their lives when his brother has apologized to him and it has always been in a time of strife. but they're not facing death or anything like that. it's just another day in quarantine, no different from the ones before. al feels lost in his confusion, worried for his brother, not sure what to make of the situation. but at least ed has released him a little, loosened his death grip a fraction and al can breathe a little more.

he steps back, only far enough to search edward's features for an answer and then brings their foreheads together. his hands seek out his brother's, hoping to entwine their fingers and squeeze in what he hops is a reassuring manner. ]

What for, Brother? [ his voice is soft, not wanting to spook ed. ] You haven't done anything wrong...

[It's the words themselves that disturb him, shake him out of whatever mental disconnect there was and bring him back to the present fully. He gives Al a look as if he doesn't quite follow what he's saying, pulling back with a shake of his head.]
,
You can't say that...

[Sure, he hadn't done anything now, but if Al really wanted to go there he could start a list. He shakes his head again, as if to clear the thought, pulling a hand back to wave off the discussion.]

Nevermind, it's nothing.

[ expression turning stern, al reaches out to catch ed's dismissive hand, watching him with brows furrowed. his brother is trying to avoid the subject and al's seen him do this so many times before that it's a little frustrating. he wants the truth, especially when it's something that clearly perturbed ed to a great level. ]

Tell me, Brother.

[He blinks when Al grabs his hand, apparently less upset about whatever it was than his brother was becoming at this point. For all the reaction it rolled off his shoulders like it never even happened and Alphonse remained so focused on it Ed was starting to wonder what the big deal was. As if he hadn't just been frozen in horrified silence. He takes a moment, answering cautiously, as if it was Al who was sensitive here.]

I ... Think I just saw one of your memories.

[Not the most direct approach, but it was a start. More than he wanted to admit to, because it would lead to questions, details that he didn't want to get into he was sure.]

[ that certainly makes al pause, freezing in place as he swallows. which memory did ed come across? was it his sacrifice of wrath? with blood and automail scattered all over the ground of the ruined amphitheater? was it yock island all over again? what about one of their rare but occasional fights? what would make ed freeze like he had? ]

You... you did? Which-

[There was some relief to Al's reaction, the fact that he seemed a little more shaken up now that he realized this was part of what was going on in this place. These memories bombarding people all month, but it wasn't the memory itself that had shaken Ed up - he was aware of that the whole time, he knew it happened years before he even experienced it himself - it wasn't until he felt the raw emotion that came with those glimpses that it distressed him. His gaze lowers at Al's question, knowing the younger would only push harder if Ed tried to dodge it.]

The day Central was invaded. When I went to get back on the ship-

[The moment that should have been the last they'd ever see of each other.]

[ ed is right in surmising that al would push harder if ed didn't tell him, but the answer he receives is not one he expects. he sucks in a breath, almost like a hiss, and swallows hard. ]

When you tried to leave by yourself.

[ he finishes the sentence for ed, knowing where he's going with it. knowing intimately what ed must've experienced. the backwash of pain and hurt, desperation and panic. the fear of losing his brother all over again after having searched so desperately for him. it's why he'd donned the red coat—ed's coat—it's why he was willing to forsake everything to bring his brother back. it's why he'd opened a door between worlds. all so he could be with his brother. ed must've experienced some of that desperation when he'd seen al's memory. all al can think is maybe it's a good thing ed has. because now he knows just how much he wants to be at his brother's side. ]

[Al says tried, and Ed blinks momentarily. Of course his brother followed after him, he knows this. They'd discussed it, Al here was only here after following him onto that ship. In Purg Alphonse had been in Germany already, even. So, he knew that he hadn't exactly succeeded. Still, his last memory was leaving, and never seeing his brother again was the intention so it was a little odd to hear Al say it like that. He swallows thickly]

Yeah...

[ the thickness in his brother's voice cues alphonse into how emotional ed must be. he would have to be after being bombarded by his little brother's emotions. al almost feels sorry for it, but he doesn't apologize. after all, his brother had tried to leave him behind. what else would he have been feeling? still, he doesn't leave ed to stew in all that. he quickly wraps his arms around his brother, pulling him into a firm hug, letting him know that he's there and not leaving. ]

I told you, didn't I? [ his voice is soft as he speaks into his brother's ear. ] You can't get rid of me even if you tried.

[The whole thing was such a jumbled mess. The fact that he had memories of his own life out of order from how they actually happened only complicated the whole thing. The years spent guilting over something he had no understanding of, trying to rationalize and now that he had the context- he realized it wasn't a choice he'd made so much as an obligation. Still, the years of guilt and confusion over it didn't just evaporate for gaining the insight, and Alphonse's emotions added to all of it only made it that much more of a nightmare to sort in his mind. He hated that he'd ever do that to his brother, that he'd ever had to, but it was the only way to assure that couldn't possibly happen again. Not because of their mistakes.

Ed doesn't move when Al pulls him into the hug, barely seems to notice the action at all, simply accepts it in silence as golden eyes close briefly with a nod.]

[ for the moment, alphonse is content to remain as they are, holding each other. he can feel his brother nod and knows that he's still struggling with everything, so he makes no sound other than a soft hum. he squeezes ed gently, before shifting his arms up to cup ed's neck. their foreheads are pressed together and al closes his own eyes as they remain, almost breathing in each other.

now that ed knows how he'd felt seeing him try to leave without him, al feels a little justified, but also sorrow because he knows his brother had had to leave. they had needed to close the gate and prevent further mistakes from happening. ed also needed to know how al felt that day and he's glad ed does, even if it causes pain. because that's what al had felt like. pain from losing something he tried so hard to regain. ]

It's okay, Brother.

[ spoken softly, his eyes still closed. ]

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[Open - Memory Share.]

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