riverviewlogs | [Mostly Closed] August Catch-All

The flat look is mostly ignored, largely because it doesn't affect him much. Nico merely stared back, shifting his hands on his hips in slight warning because like Jay, Nico's in a bad mood. Being called "Nic" didn't help much.

"As far as I know. Loki's still running the place, though. So if you have any issues, take them to him," he replied with a shrug. He didn't know Tim Drake that well, other than the guy wasn't keen on him using zombies as part of his bouncer job, but with him gone, Nico had more free reign than he had before. A bonus as far as he was concerned.

"Anyway, I'm off now, so don't make trouble. The other bouncers aren't as strict as me, but I'll still deal with you if I have to," he continued, moving out of the way of the door to let them in.

"Because dying again is unpleasant. Especially if you drag it out over a few decades." He's rolling his eyes though, he was expecting as much and Jay answered in kind to his expectations.

Ed wasn't really familiar with Trixie, or Nico's work schedule or he might have reconsidered this little venture. He knew there was tension between Nico and Jay and it honestly annoyed him because as far as he was concerned it was entirely unnecessary. He knew something was off as soon as he saw Nico, but he wasn't going to ask him about it out here like this. He probably wouldn't ask him about it at all, the amnesia certainly took a toll on all of them in their own ways.

At Nico's words Ed glances sideways at Jay, to see what he does. He might visibly sigh with relief when Jason simply crushes the cigarette without protest. Unfortunately, Jay's habit of using nicknames comes into the conversation and it takes effort for him not to visibly wince at the question. This conversation was between them so he wasn't going to get into it, but somehow he doubted Nico would appreciate being crowned with a new nickname against his will.

Nico's response surprises him though, becuase even though he didn't know Jay's relationship with Tim he could guess from the question that he was asking as someone who knew him - not someone interested in the set up of the club. Maybe that was just something he'd grown used to spotting in all the years in Purg.

When he stepped back from the door Ed glanced at Jay briefly before tilting his head, watching Nico curiously. "Why don't you join us? We're just grabbing a few drinks." He doesn't say it looks like Nico could use some, he knew from the masquerade that Nico wasn't a drinker, but then again he wasn't either.

Jason let it go, mostly because explaining he heals fast now because of the pit was just a bag of cats he wasn't about to open.

"Yeah, I'll take to Lok later about it, someone had to know something abouthat Timbers." It's a habit of terrible nicknames long seemed from his days as the Boy Wonder. Ed was right that there was more to it, and Jay looked bothered at Nico's answer.

"I'm not going to start trouble, not here. I respect Lok and Timbers more than that." He ran a hand through his hair in a nervous habit. "Come on Ed, and yeah, when your off you should join us." He offered back to Nico and headed inside to a booth.

"Let me just put my sword away and I'll join you guys," Nico replied. With that, he disappeared from the shadow of the door, just as his relief took over and headed up to the workroom to put his sword away. It probably wouldn't be great to have it around in the club itself and if trouble arouse, which he trusted Jay wouldn't happen, he could always summon some skeletons. But he didn't foresee that happening, so he soon headed back downstairs.

He hadn't bothered to change, figuring his usual black clothes were fine enough, and he quickly looked around for the other two men, hands in his pockets as he scanned the crowd.

Ed took note of Jay's reaction to Nico's answer, but didn't bother interrupting. If Jason didn't want to say that wasn't the reason he was asking, it was hardly Ed's place to interject.

When Nico agreed, Ed gave him one last glance before following after Jason to a place to sit. He knew Nico didn't need the sword to defend himself, but this hardly seemed like a situation that it would be needed.

Golden eyes scanned the area once they were settled, taking in their surroundings and getting a feel for the place as well as sizing up the crowd. This wasn't really Ed's thing and it was probably obvious, which made him feel even more awkward about it, but he had taken Jay up on the invitation so it hardly seemed fair to back out after the fact. Even so he searched for Nico quietly after some time had passed, offering a wave to where they were seated once he caught sight of him.

As Nico approached Ed turned his attention back to Jay, "Any chance you have a usual here?" He figured Jason might if he knew the guys running it, but he had no idea the guy had been avoiding the place up until now.

"That sword is cool as fuck." Was the last thing Jason said as Nico walked off, he took a seat and leaves back, rubeing both his hands over his face, something he does often when he's tired.

He chuckled at Ed's question. "Nah, my usual haunt is the Quarantine. To many people know me here." He spoke honestly seeing no point in lying. "Always start with the George Throughgood, one Bourbon one scotch and one beer." He mostly joked knowing Ed likely wouldn't know the song.

His eyes scanning for Nico might appear from, hopefully not his shadow this time. He so wasn't in the mood.

Edited 2017-08-28 00:03 (UTC)

Having disappeared into the shadows, Nico missed the comment, but he would've preened if he knew. Still, he didn't, so as far as he knows Jay still doesn't like him and once he reappears in the club, he's quick to find Jay and Ed ( large in part due to their auras ). Settling down next to them, he gave the bartender a nod. The man behind the counter didn't bother checking his age given he was an employee and went about making something he knew Nico would like ( something extremely fruity, naturally ), as well as putting in an order for fries. It was something Nico liked to unwind with when he was done with work.

But that led to the question of why Jay and Ed were there. Neither seemed like the type to like a place like Trixie and Nico knew Ed wasn't much of a drinker. "So what brings you guys here?" he asked before directing his attention back to the bartender and quickly requesting that his employee discount be extended to the two of them.

That brought up an interesting question, but he wasn't sure how straight forward an answer he'd get if he asked. "Then why did we come here, instead?" It was pure curiosity, he was surprised more than anything, if Jay had a regular place to go it seemed odd not to go there instead.

At the order Ed made a face, no he didn't get the song reference but if there was one thing he didn't think was worth drinking it was beer. Maybe that was a bias from Purg where no one seemed to drink the stuff, but it didn't even smell good. "Think I'll pass."

When Nico returned he watched him interact with the bartender curiously, before turning his attention back to Jason at the question. "It was his idea, I just came along for the ride." Really, Ed didn't know why, it seemed like a good idea at the time. Between the amnesia, the nightmare, the cure causing a fever and all that, he just needed to get out of his own head for awhile. A nap might have been a better idea.

Jason was prickly, always had been. Coming back from the dead had done nothing for that but make it worse, he had his select few he would be as openly affectionate as he was willing to be, but otherwise people were held at an arms length, but he was warming to Nico, even if he didn't say as much.

The beer of choice, that Jason ordered was a darker beer, and he ordered a pitcher at that. "What's the point in coming if your not going to drink?" He asked, but for once he didn't have that judging tone in his voice. It was hard to be angry at Ed hell, he knew Ed wasn't a drinker. "I couldn't go to my usual haunt, I pissed off the bar tender there." he admitted with a wave of his hand, truth be told he didn't piss Drew off, he just wasn't ready to apologize, Though his eyes kept drifting to towards the offices hoping to see the sleep ambled body of Tim shuffle out like a zombie even if he was pretty sure by now he had the last confirmation that his little brother was gone. He should call Damian and Dick... but he doubted he would be very welcome if they were hurting. Jon had just lost Clark, and that was bad enough.

"I've had a shit week, and I intend to drink until my eyes float, and hopefully sleep through the night." Jason offered with a shrug waiting for that pitcher to arrive.

"You had a shit week?" Nico finds himself asking. It just comes out, laden with annoyance because he can't imagine anyone's week was worse than his. After regaining his memories ( and getting sick as a result ), he's been in a hideous mood and it shows. Normally, Nico's not the type to swear, but he doesn't hold back now, tempted to do as Jason is doing and drown his memories in alcohol. The problem is, he doesn't know how much it would take when the metabolism of a demigod is a lot stronger than that of a mortal.

"The whole memory thing was a disaster," he mutters, gesturing at the bartender for something stronger. He has faith the bartender can choose something he'll actually like drinking and within a few seconds, there's a rum and coke sitting in front of him. One he sips at through the mixing straw.

Ed visibly bristled at the question, but he wasn't about to start an argument when they were all obviously in quite a mood. Instead of pointing out that he didn't have to drink just because he was here he gives Jason a pointed look. "I didn't say I wasn't going to drink, I just said I wasn't going to drink that." The usual bite was lost from his tone, though - compared to previous times he had snapped at Jay, it seemed like the effort of getting annoyed wasn't worth it, if anything. "What'd you do?" The question was out before he even considered that perhaps Jason wasn't inclined to share, not that he'd expect an answer. He was used to Floor Six and all of their mystery lifestyles.

His attitude, mild as it was, sobers immediately when Nico snaps. He lifts his hands as if to ward off a potential fight, "Look, no one's happy about waking up remembering whatever the hell we forgot. That much is obvious. Maybe we shouldn't try to compare notes over who has it worse, right now." He looks a little unsettled though, agreeing with Nico's muttered addition. "We can't be the only ones on the whole moon who woke up hating what we remembered, okay?" He knew what Jason forgot, but he hadn't seen Nico the entire time and that worried him. He had no idea what he'd been through, what he'd forgotten and remembered but he knew Nico didn't like to be worried about so he kept his attention focused elsewhere.

Like ordering a drink once the bartender was done putting something together for Nico.

"Yes, Nico, I think we all did." He spoke a nod of thanks given once their drinks came, Jay poured some of the pitcher into a glass and sat back. "None of us deserved that shit." His blue eyes seemed much colder with his memories back. Haunted like one whose died should be.

"Well, Ed, if you must know, fifteen years old me didn't approve of my choice of bed mates. I owe some fucking apologies and now have to show my fucking id at the bar." He explained to Ed before shifting looking to Nico, then to Edo. "I dont hate what I forgot, I hate what I lost. I was a mostly good kid, I didn't deserve what was waiting for me." He took a drink again. "So, come on boys, lay the cards on the table, your both the closest things I've got to friends, sad as that is. So, tell me what yours was." Yes, despite how he acted, he enjoyed Nico, something about the way the guy makes the hairs on his neck rise makes him an interesting person.

Nico didn't want to talk about what he remembered and what he forgot. It was the last thing he wanted to talk about as he sipped his drink, but it was only fair that he did, given Jason was apparently sharing. So, taking a deep breath and releasing it slowly, he shakes his head.

"I've been through some... stuff. The worst of it can be compared to walking through the darkest, most dangerous parts of Christian hell. That was Tartarus, where all the most evil of creatures are born and the darkest gods reside," he began, hesitance in his voice. This is the first time he's ever talked about it to anyone. He hadn't needed to with Reyna since she felt it for herself by sharing her strength with him, but even she didn't know the full capacity of the horrors he'd been through. Now he's opening himself up, in a way he's never done before, and he can only hope the other two will understand.

"The goddess of Misery is there. Akhlys, she's called. To her, I am the embodiment of perfection. While she'd inflict misery on others, she thought I was perfect. And that's not even the worst of it all."

Edited 2017-08-30 02:11 (UTC)

Ed remains quiet when Jay points out that none of them deserved that. He didn't deserve to forget what happened, but Al didn't deserve to go through him remembering. He visibly winces at Jason's response, immediately regretting asking but he wasn't about to retort that he didn't need to know, in case Jay took it the wrong way.

Before he can even think to process a reply to Jason's words he's moving the conversation back on the other two. He had been an innocent kid, dealt a shit life, Ed knew that from their previous conversation. Unlike him, who'd brought most of his own shit onto himself. He did pipe up a little stiffly, "Good to know that's sad." He might have otherwise agreed, but maybe Jason had more friends that he felt he should have been closer to.

When Nico speaks he remembers the conversation they had comparing Tartarus to Purg, but Nico hadn't been that specific before. The idea that Misery felt that Nico was perfect was enough of an insight on his situation without any other details, but he had to go and add that it wasn't the worst of it. He takes a sip of his drink, keeping his gaze averted once Nico finishes.

Then, flatly, he adds his own memory to the mix. "I killed Al. Back in Purg, before I came here. I transmuted him before he even realized what I was doing.... before I even realized- when I came to there was nothing left." Shreds of red fabric and dripping blood, but Ed didn't add that part. Without another word Ed downs half his drink, the same way he did the first time Jay saw him with alcohol.

Jason sat back in his chair to one hand staying on the glass as he shrugged to Ed. "I could elaborate but it's not important." He did have other friends, he even had his family, but much like with his team of Outlaws back home, it was easier to talk to the people you face dangers unknown with than those who are suppose to be closer.

Jason's blue eyes widened a bit as Nico described not only Tartarus but Akhlys. He knew a lot of Greek Mythology, he was a hell of a lot smarter than he lets on. "Fuck." That was all he could say at first to Nico. Someone had to be pretty deep in the pain to be perfect to someone like that, but not just that, but the fact it confirmed for Jason that Nico wasn't normal. Maybe that was why he bristled so much around the other... and where he got that bitching sword. He took another drink before shaking his head a little. "What's worse than misery finding you perfect after treking through hell?" He left the sarcasm out of his voice for once, after all, he may joke about his own death, but not things like that.

Then Ed speaks and Jason's eyes widen again. Not Al. Al was a fluffy fucking kitten. There had to be more, he wanted to slam his fits down and demand Ed tell him why, but... he had learned enough of Ed's character and personality to know there had to be a reason, he hated when people questioned him and his choices. He watches the way Ed downs the drink again, much like when they had spoke in the kitchen. Seeing it was bad, something had happened with the brother's their clearly. "...I dont even know what to say to that." He admitted looking to the blond, clearly unsure how he felt about the idea of it all.

Taking a drink from his glass motioning for them to continue, he would wait to finish sharing for right now. Wanting to hear what they had gone through more than explaining Sheila and his worst mistake yet.

Nico didn't know what to say to that either. He tries to imagine what it would've been like if he killed his sister rather than Bianca dying on a quest, but he simply can't picture it. He knows Ed and Al are practically inseparable and to think that Ed once killed Al ( never mind the whole how did Al come back to life bit ), makes his mind boggle and it isn't due to the drink.

"There's more to it than that, isn't there?" he asks, much more concerned with Ed's story than sharing more of his own. He doesn't want to talk about how he was in love with a boy who would never love him back or that he was always an outcast. Those were just memories he wanted to push aside. He takes another sip of his drink, feeling the liquor burn on the way down and relishes it. Then, his basket of fries arrives and he begins picking at them as he turns to Ed.

"You wouldn't do that without a reason," he says. "Your brother and you are just..." He gestures with a fry in hand, obviously unable to put the sheer magnitude of the Elrics' relationship into words.

Ed wasn't really too fussed about Jay's lack of elaboration. It was true these two were probably the best friends he had here, and maybe Yuffie, but to hear it from Jay was a little weird. He just kind of figured Jay had other things going on.

Jay asks what's worse than Misery finding you perfect after going through and he feels his stomach practically drop at that. He wasn't Nico, so he couldn't say, couldn't really understand how bad all of that was for him - but for Ed the news he'd casually just dropped on both of them probably covered it.

The silence stretches longer than Ed's comfortable with before Nico speaks again. He shrugs, less dismissive and more hunching his shoulders as if to ward off the question, grip tightening on the glass he's holding. A reason? He didn't have a reason, that was the probably the worst part of it, and Ed just shifts in his seat as if he can disappear if he tries hard enough.

"I didn't have a reason...." That was probably not the best start, but there it was. "What reason could I have to kill my own brother?" He doesn't want to snap at Nico, it wasn't like he had anything to do with it but the question just digs into every one of Ed's own insecurities about what happened. Too late though, and his expression is a mix of panic and anger as he speaks. "I couldn't stop it. I wasn't- in control of my own body when it happened."

Jason didn't even ask, just sat up and reached over grabbing a couple of Nico's fries. Yes, he's that guy, he will help himself to other peoples food. Jason shook his head when he listened to the two of them, pouring more beer in his glass once he had eaten the fries.

"You don't always need reasons that make sense. I nearly killed my brother's multiple times." He looked towards the office. "Nearly killed Tim just for existing." Yep, that's why they are there. "I didn't have reasons, not ones that made sense. I came back from the dead a bit rabid isn't really a good reason." There was a sense of regret in his voice, after all, Tim didn't deserve what he had done to him, done to Bruce... he hadn't gone after Grayson that hard and didn't know about Damian yet, so, Tim got it worse than anyone.

Blinking at what the other two say, Nico finds himself shocked. He drains his rum and coke, ordering another one and pushes his fries towards Jason to share. But his mind is on the thought of killing a sibling. Nico still can't imagine ever doing that. He'd never have been able to hurt Bianca, and the thought of harming Hazel scares him. And then Ed says he wasn't in control of his body at the time and it all clicks in.

It wasn't Ed at all. In fact, it was whatever was controlling his body and Nico is familiar with spirits taking over and forcing a person to do something they'd never do.

"If it was like that, it's not your fault. I can't speak for Jason, but if you couldn't control your body, then you're not to blame. It's whatever took control," he says, quickly picking up his new drink and sipping at it.

Ed watches Jay grab the fries, glancing at Nico as he pushes them closer but not getting involved in that interaction. Thankfully, because if he'd had something in his mouth when Jason spoke next he probably would have choked.

His blood ran cold, practically glaring at Jay's suggestion. "It's not that it didn't make sense, it's that there just wasn't one." At all. Ed had no motivation to hurt his brother in any sense of the word, outright murdering him? It would have been unthinkable except for the fact that it had happened. The idea that Jason had with his own intentions gone after his brothers left a cold pit in his stomach and suddenly he didn't have a taste for much of anything.

Nico's words aren't all that reassuring either, he had heard them before. Everyone in Purg had begged him to reconsider leaving after it had happened. Like he was in charge, like he was the most capable person there to handle the situation when he'd also been infected. "Watanuki said that, too..." If he was so capable he wouldn't have hurt Al to begin with, it was no control of his own that he snapped out of it after it happened as far as he was concerned. A short reprieve that gave him the chance to take care of the problem, nothing more.

"I should have stopped it." He should have been in more control, he was in control for so long, just enough to make him think he was fine, actually. Leading up to Al's death there had been some other behaviors that implied he really hadn't been, but he wasn't aware at the time. "I should have stopped it before Al had to die, because of me." He sighs, taking a drink before adding softly, "Everyone had to keep it a secret from him, what I did after he died. No one else really thought it was a good idea, either."

It would be easy to blame it on Talia, the way she baited him, showing him pictures of Tim and clips of things the Joker had done before turning him on Bruce, a lot of what happened with him and Talia didn't make sense, why had she saved him? Why did she have him trained to be a world class assassin before sending him after her baby daddy who she loved so very much...why had she slept with him in that volatile point in his life. It would have been easy to blame Talia, but he thought the world of her even with her dead now.

"I didn't do it because I aimed to. I didn't come back right." Blame the pit, it felt better. "The Pit brought me back basically rabid, it's taken years of training to be the man I am now, I merely meant if you had no reason I could understand... but you can't blame yourself for shit outside of your power. That's victim blaming and I refuse to accept that. "

"I agree with Jason," Nico piped up, taking another sip of his drink. If Ed couldn't control what he'd done, then it wasn't his fault and there was no arguing that in Nico's mind. He glanced over at the blond, trying to decipher the expression he was making and decided that Ed had enough stewing in his own agony.

"This sucks," he said, hoping to turn the attention away from Ed, to give the older guy a break. "You know, I once met Cupid and he forced me to out myself. I think that was one of the worst things remembering again. That I'm gay and too creepy for anyone to like. And I could've still been hiding it, if he hadn't made me confess."

Jason is going to get the brunt of his glare even if Nico agrees, but Ed doesn't argue the point. He'd been told not to blame himself so many times, after everyone blamed him initially, he was used to it. He wasn't going to dwell on it, either. With how long it had been, and how he had been trying to work on getting past it up until this happened, the loss and rediscovery of the memory made it easy to backtrack on some of that progress.

"I don't even know what that would be like." Dying, and coming back different. He'd died before and he knew he was going home to do it again, but he hadn't come back any different, he couldn't imagine feeling that way. Jay also left out a lot of details, which was going to skew the perception of his experiences no matter what.

He glances at Nico again when he shifts the topic, trying not to look as pathetically grateful as he feels for the shift of focus. He knew talking about things was not exactly easy for either of them - Ed was used to it, had been doing this sort of thing for years now, by this point - but seeing Nico especially open up was a strange experience. Not only because of how closed off he seemed, where Ed and Jay shared stories already, but because Nico's experiences were so far removed from anything he would have really been able to grasp if not for this whole multiverse experience.

For one thing, he couldn't imagine that being worse than the other things Nico had shared, but it was Nico's personal situation so obviously he'd know best. Or, so Ed assumed - sexuality had literally never even occurred to him. "You're not too creepy for anyone to like," Honestly, that part just sounded like nonsense to him but that was probably because he found Nico far less creepy than the average person seemed to. "Being forced to confess something you're not ready to talk about is never easy, but what kind of fucked up world do you live in where who you care about matters that much?" There's another skewed perception, he never really thought about it at home but in Purg no one talked about sexuality and no one cared about who or how many people were gay. Most of the guys Ed knew in that place were invested in other guys, and in Attollo it didn't matter who you were with or how, as long as it was with someone. "What'd he care, anyway? It's not anyone else's business."

Jason kept his eyes on Ed at first, with that 'fight me' look in his eyes. He let a lot of things go, but when it came to his opinions on victims he would stand his ground. As someone continually blamed for his own murder he had strong opinions. Of course it was the 15 year olds fault that a grown ass man in clown make up took a crowbar to him. Well it was but not to that extreme.

"It fucking sucked is what it did. There's nothing worse than dying then coming back and wanting nothing more than to kill the one person that ever gave a fuck about you. Or to desire to kill the one that took your place." He shifted his eyes to the office again, another drink taken before he shrugged. "The Lazurus pit does that, it will make you damn near immortal if you bathe in it every few years... but theres a price to pay. It either drives the users made or rabid." Jason had already had a temper, the pit just tossed gasoline on it.

Like with Ed his eyes shifted to Nico. He squinted a bit as he took another drink. "Yeah, what Ed said. Your not creepy. Hell you just look like one of those emo band singers all the girls are crazy about." He didn't mean it to sound insulting. Hell if Nico was older, and if he wasnt hung up on someone and refusing to be serious with... well anyone, he'd have made a comment. But he's still new at this whole guy on guy action. He was holding out for a hero, the one he hoped might one day come, the one whose heart he broke to spare the guy a life of pain.

"Emo band singers..." He said with mild skepticism. Nico wasn't even sure what he meant, but he knew he didn't want girls to be crazy about him. That wasn't his kind of thing. Still, if his looks could draw someone too him (which he doubted), he supposed that wasn't too bad.

He glanced at Ed, catching the grateful look that he'd changed the subject and figured he'd roll with it. If he could give Ed a break, that was good. Then, he glanced at Jason, realizing that this "Lazarus pit" was what he'd sensed on the older man. It made sense; it sounded vaguely like Tartarus, and Nico felt bad that Jason had to have experienced it.

But it was Ed's question that brought him back to the discussion at hand. Nico hedged a little bit, not the type to explain things about his life like this, but eventually he sighed.

"Cupid had a scepter I needed for a battle, but in order to get it, I had to reveal myself to him. I didn't like it. That god is an asshole, but I guess he had a point about not hiding anymore. Admitting I'm gay isn't so hard now."

[Mostly Closed] August Catch-All

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