riverviewlogs | [open] cancel your reservations

Entry tags:

[open] cancel your reservations

who: cisco + anyone!
what: catch-all, amnesia event
when: august
where: anywhere; if you want a starter, please hit me up!
warnings: discussion of murder, use of alcohol to cope, will add more as needed

i. pre-amnesia (august 5-10)

[ Cisco knows that he is probably opening himself up to a world of headaches and unnecessary trouble, but there have been plenty of new arrivals, and more and more he is noticing that people who show up from non-technologically advanced worlds simply have no support system to really teach them all the cool things they can do even with their phones, not to mention other machines and devices. So, one day when there's a lull between projects for the RPD and other emergency services, he goes to a print shop and has flyers made:

TECHNOLOGICAL CULTURE SHOCK??? NEED LESSONS ON HOW TO USE YOUR PHONE, LAPTOP, OR OTHER ELECTRONIC GADGET??? STOP BY THE ADDRESS BELOW FOR A FREE INFORMAL LESSON!!!

Normally it's the kind of announcement he would make over the network, but what if someone is really struggling and can't even get on there? No, flyers seem like the way to go for this crowd. Cisco adds some fine print at the bottom, below the address for his workshop, but all it says is:

*NO HIDDEN AGENDA JUST A HELPFUL DUDE WANTING TO SHARE THE WONDERS OF TECHNOLOGY, LESSONS ARE FREE BUT TRIBUTE PAID IN CANDY IS ALWAYS ACCEPTED]

ii. amnesia (august 12-19)

[ The changes in Cisco are not, at first, as obvious as they may be in other people. He remembers Riverview, and everyone he has met here, and all the details of his life in this place. He remembers his name, all the movies and video games that he loves, all the technical skills and scientific know-how necessary for his job. He even remembers most stuff about his own past - that he worked at S.T.A.R. Labs, that he's a member of Team Flash and friend to Barry Allen. That he is a metahuman, with various abilities tied to manipulating multidimensional energy.

The only thing that has been carved away from his memory is, in fact, Eobard Thawne. Cisco doesn't remember his mentor's betrayal, or being murdered, or the circumstances that surrounded him discovering his powers. All of the shame and dread he's been carrying about his powers, because of Eobard and the things he'd said and done, has just vanished. In addition, Cisco's trauma over that whole experience is, for the moment, covered over. To anyone who knows him even a little he will seem inexplicably younger. Quicker to smile and laugh, volumes more trusting, and also a lot more inclined to talk about some guy named Dr. Wells in a positive, even devoted manner.

Cisco will spend this week doing what he usually does - working at his workshop (still offering those lessons), trying out new restaurants, shopping for graphic tees and games and movies, exploring the safe parts of the city a little - but with an extra spring in his step. If you've wanted your character to find out about him being a metahuman, now would be a good time for it! ]

iii. post-amnesia (august 20-31)

[ The not-remembering? Had been good. But when that's done, and all of Cisco's memories are restored to him, the transition is... rough. Putting it mildly. Back when all of it had happened, there had been so much going on - one life-or-death situation after the other - that he hadn't had time to linger too much on how he was changing, being shaped into an older, sadder, more broken version of himself.

Now, though, there is no big crisis, no distraction to divert his attention. One minute he is the old, sunny Cisco - the one he still thinks of as the person he was supposed to be - and the next, it all comes rushing back. The contrast is stark, and it's kind of fucking him up a little. Or, rather, a lot.

He goes back to having nightmares almost as often as he did in those first weeks after his death, which means he isn't getting a whole lot of sleep, and it shows in the dark circles under his eyes. Cisco withdraws somewhat - not enough to worry that he's abandoning anyone, but he takes longer to answer texts, doesn't reach out to people first, doesn't go out and about in the evenings. He is quieter, with considerably more strain behind his smiles. He throws himself into his work, staying in his workshop long hours, sometimes falling asleep there, for a few fitful hours. When he can't work any more, he spends a little more time than he should in some nearby bars, drinking a little more than he ought to, trying not to think about the person he is now compared to the person he was the week before. ]

iv. misc

[ Come plot something! ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Eddie nods as Cisco pauses the movie, and turns to him, paying attention to what he's saying and commenting that he hadn't realized it was amnesia.]

Yeah, that's what's going on, anyway. People forgetting things, sometimes really important stuff, like their own names and that kind of thing, or really simple stuff, like how to brush their teeth. I've been fielding it all day, at work, you know?

[For a moment, he's quiet, chewing on his lip and then glancing up at Cisco.]

I just realized this morning that I think I got hit, too. Forgot something. But it's really, really stupid.

[ Cisco sees the way that Eddie is chewing at his lip, and the tension in his shoulders. Even before he says that he's been effected, Cisco guesses that might be what's going on. Judging by the state of his chin it's probably "to shave", but just in case that isn't what Eddie is about to say, Cisco doesn't offer any guesses. ]

What is it? I'm not gonna judge, promise.

[ He is struck by a new sense of gratitude, that this particular bizarre occurrence has passed him over. That has happened a few times before, too - when everyone was turning into alternate versions of himself, Cisco had gotten through it without a change. He wonders if there is a pattern, if it's something that he's done. Or maybe it's just... random. Probably not environmental, since he and Eddie live together and it had gotten only one of them... ]

[Nervously, Eddie licks his lips and then lifts his hand and scratches at the stubble on his face before dragging his fingers through his hair and making a face. Cisco is promising that he's not going to judge, but Eddie feels a little gross and a little uncomfortable, and it takes him a moment or two to get it out.]

Shaving and...washing my hair.

[Pursing his lips, he avoids eye contact, licking his lips again, and then sighs deeply.]

Yeah. Pretty pathetic, huh? It's just completely gone. I have no idea. Is a brush involved? Do I use the bar of soap? I know I have to get it wet, but...

[Shrugging, he smiles slightly, lifting his chin so he can shyly look back up at Cisco, his face flushed.]

Oooh.

[ Cisco's mouth forms a little 'o' of understanding; he hadn't realized it, but Eddie's hair is looking a little less stellar than usual. Not anything egregious, but he usually keeps it looking so sharp. Cisco should have noticed that before now, along with the stubble.

He can tell from the slight hunch of his shoulders, from the way he keeps rubbing at his own face, that Eddie is embarrassed. Maybe even ashamed. Which Cisco immediately thinks is ridiculous, because this is no more Eddie's fault than those people forgetting their names. Still, these sorts of things - grooming, his appearance - must feel very basic to Eddie, and forgetting how to do them frustrating in the extreme. ]

I could write you out instructions, if you wanted... [ But Cisco's hesitation to follow that plan is clear in his tone of voice, the skepticism showing through. ] ...or, if you want, I can give your hair a wash for you, and all that. One of my cousins works at a salon and I filled in there a couple times, when people ditched work and they were desperate and swamped. Not cutting or anything like that, just doing the shampoos or whatever. So, y'know. That makes me a professional, right?

[ He offers that last bit as a joke, hoping to coax at least a small smile from Eddie, who is looking so vulnerable and unhappy at the moment. ]

[The moment Cisco makes that sort of cooing noise, Eddie winces and drops his gaze again. Honestly, it's pretty humiliating for Eddie, who prides himself on his physical appearance, who's cultivated that part of himself carefully so he can fit in in a way that he's always wanted to since he was a kid, a way that he was never able to. It's like armour, his hair and clothes, his perfect grooming and well-chosen outfits, something to hide behind that makes him safe and invisible except when he wants to be.

And the idea of having Cisco write him out instructions is somehow even worse than the idea of just combing his hair back and leaving it dirty until whatever's causing this is cleared out. He's about to politely decline when Cisco is suddenly offering to wash his hair for him, and his cheeks go even more pink. Licking his lips again (he can't stop doing it, the anxiety is killing him a little), he exhales and shrugs.]

I mean, if you really want to...it would be nice to have clean hair.

[ Eddie's complexion really doesn't do him any favors, when it comes to hiding his feelings. Cisco can see that flush going across Eddie's face, down his neck, and up to the roots of his, yes, somewhat lackluster looking hair. It's hard, seeing Eddie looking so much more small than he's used to, like he's trying to make himself tiny, unobtrusive. It actually hurts, an ache in Cisco's chest, and he is grateful when Eddie gives his reluctant agreement. ]

I really want to.

[ Cisco says it at once, without hesitation, slapping his hands against his thighs before getting to his feet, making it clear with that gesture that he means to do this right now, no waiting or uncertainty. He knows that gross, god-I-need-to-wash-my-hair feeling, and he doesn't think Eddie should have to put up with it for a second longer. As for the logistics, well, he can work them out as he goes. The important thing is to just act like he knows what he's doing, and this is totally normal, and hopefully some of that will rub off. ]

C'mon, let's do it in my bathroom, there's a tub - which'll be way better than a sink, trust me - and anyway my conditioner's nicer than yours.

[ And he walks over to the bottom of the stairs, waiting for Eddie to follow him. ]

What, now?

[Blinking, Eddie takes a few moments to register that before he's standing up and nodding, breath a little faster, heart pounding for reasons he's not entirely certain about. Maybe it's because hair washing is such an intimate thing, personal, something he usually does while he's naked, showering, cleaning himself. It feels oddly vulnerable, but if there's anyone here he feels okay being that vulnerable with, it's Cisco.

So there's really no reason for his heart to be beating so quickly while he heads up the stairs with Cisco, glancing at him occasionally as if for reassurance.]

Yeah? Why would a tub be better?

[For a moment, he pauses inside Cisco's door, waiting to be invited further in, feeling weird and awkward and just slightly out of place.]

You're really sure about this?

Mhm. No time like the present. You'll feel better after, trust me.

[ He catches those little glances over at him, but pretends he doesn't see them, the same as he's pretending he knows with absolute certainty what he is doing. He has to be here for Eddie right now, and the best way he knows how to do that is to take control, forge ahead without questioning himself. Eddie's question about why a tub would be better is an easy way to do that, because he has a good answer for it. ]

Sinks at salons are designed for hair washing. If we do it one of ours, we'll just get it all clogged up with hair, and it'll definitely hurt your neck. The tub'll let me wash your hair without making you bend back all weird, and there's more space.

[ When Eddie asks if he's sure about it, Cisco smiles softly. It's such a strange mix of feelings, this sort of aching affection, and protectiveness, and longing. It's so rare, seeing Eddie like this - at anything less than his best. It makes Cisco want to take care of him, to nurture him. Which is probably a little weird, considering he's an independent, self-reliant adult. But Cisco can't stop feeling it. ]

Totally sure. You go ahead in, first, and get down to your boxers. I'll be back in just a moment.

[ Cisco lets Eddie go get ready in the bathroom, while he goes to his bed, reaching around underneath it for the little plastic stepstool he keeps underneath, for reaching things down from the higher shelves. He carries it with him back to the bathroom, hoping the momentary detour has has the added bonus of giving him an excuse to miss at least most of Eddie taking his clothes off. No need to tempt awkwardness, any more than they already have to. ]

Okay, okay, I give.

[Finally, Eddie manages a shy little smile, eyes on Cisco's face, and he listens while Cisco explains why the tub. When Cisco vacates the room after asking him to get down to his boxers, Eddie flushes again, but he knew that was coming, so he doesn't protest. It only takes a few minutes to shrug off his suit jacket and vest, his tie and his button-up shirt, to undo his gun belt and pants and put them all to the side, neatly folded to maintain the creases where they're supposed to be, and then he's wearing just his black boxer-briefs and nothing else. The scar from being shot is there, on his chest, over his heart, still pink and a bit soft, but he doesn't think anything of it, he hasn't realized yet that Cisco is also affected by the amnesia.

By the time Cisco gets back into the room, Eddie's sitting on the edge of the tub in his underwear, smiling sheepishly at him.]

Okay, so what now? I'm guessing...I probably have to lean over the tub, right? Otherwise this would get really messy really quick.

[ He'd prepared himself, for coming in and seeing Eddie with his clothes off, but even so... it's still hard not to stare. So much of his thighs are showing, beneath those boxer briefs - muscled and covered in pale, soft hair. And the lines of his neck, and shoulders, and arms... Cisco knows it will be obvious, how much he is not looking. But he doesn't know what else to do.

Clearing his throat, he chimes in, a touch brighter than is entirely genuine: ]

I've got an even better idea.

[ And Cisco lifts that little step stool, grinning. He sets it down inside the tub, gestures Eddie towards it. ]

Sit on that, and I'll take it from there, alright?

[ It'll take a little leaning and a little dexterity, to wash Eddie's hair that way and not get his boxers wet, but Cisco thinks he is up to the challenge, and it's the most comfortable and least embarrassing position he could think of, for Eddie. Just sitting normally, not contorting himself in any way. Cisco pulls down the shower head (one of those ones attached to a flexible hose, fortunately for them), turns on the water, and starts to get the temperature right. ]

[Eddie feels a little self-conscious, when Cisco looks at him, clears his throat, but it's not because he feels judged. It's because this is the first time he's worn this little clothing around Cisco since they were in that bed together in the darkness, and because hair washing, bathing, is such an intimate thing. Personal and private. And Cisco is going to be helping him with it.

But he manages to keep himself from showing too much discomfort or anticipation or anything else that gives away the nervous internal turmoil he's experiencing at being in his underwear in Cisco's bathroom. Stepping into the tub, he sits down on the stool and leans back a little bit, eyes flicking up to Cisco's face.]

Alright. I trust you.

[And then Cisco is pulling the showerhead down and turning it on, getting the temperature of the water right, and Eddie keeps his eye on him.]

Should I lean back more?

Yeah, just a little, about right... here. You can put your arms on the sides, probably more comfortable. Or, y'know, don't and just make this like, some kinda workout for your core. Multitask it up in here.

[ Cisco might not be a fitness dude, like Eddie, but he can replicate the lingo, a little. And so he chatters away as he brings the shower head up and starts to wet Eddie's hair, the water falling down and into the tub. A few droplets may trickle down Eddie's back, but for the most part, the improvised solution works.

Once he's got Eddie's hair wet enough, Cisco rests the shower head down in the tub and squirts some shampoo into his hands, starts working it into Eddie's hair, gentle and, yes, a bit practiced. That hadn't been a lie, about working a little in his cousin's salon. He lathers up Eddie's hair thoroughly, working the suds through the pale strands, making sure to get all the way down to his scalp. ]

What even constitutes a core, anyway? 'Cause I feel like one time Oliver said it's not just your abs or whatever, but like, thighs too? Is that true, or was he jerking my chain? I could never tell when that guy was joking or not.

[When Cisco suggests he make this a workout for his core, Eddie actually laughs, bright and happy and open, for the first time all day.]

You know, I think you've got a point there. Good suggestion, but don't judge me if my voice gets all tense, it's just the workout.

[A little smile, and he leans back, the muscle in his chest and belly tensing as he looks up at Cisco, mouth curved warmly and eyes bright. Cisco wets his hair with hot but not too hot water, and it feels good, beyond good, to have the water running through it. Even better, when Cisco squeezes some shampoo into his hands, and Eddie recognizes that scent, the smell of Cisco's shampoo, and then Cisco is lathering it into his hair, strong hands firmly massaging it through his hair. The moment Cisco is doing it, Eddie remembers how hair is washed, but he knows, somehow, that he's going to forget again shortly, it's a fleeting, vague thing that's already fading from his mind by the time he acknowledges that he's remembering.

Instead, he just focuses on how Cisco's hands feel while he scrubs his fingertips against Eddie's scalp, almost like a massage, and he closes his eyes, pale lashes fluttering. When Cisco asks what constitutes a core, Eddie laughs softly.]

All the muscles in your torso. I mean, thighs aren't really part of it, but your butt definitely is.

[A pause, and then curiously.]

Do you mean Oliver as in Oliver Queen?

I think we can just declare everything past the top stair a judgment-free one, 24/7. That's a Cisco Ramon guarantee.

[ It's just nonsense, mostly, to keep himself talking as he works the shampoo into the roots of Eddie's hair, making sure he gets every last bit before he is picking up the shower head again and rinsing, careful, one hand ready to stop any suds that might try to make their way down Eddie's back. It's a little messier, than when he'd just been wetting down Eddie's hair, but he manages. Still, splitting his attention means there is a brief pause before he asks 'hm?' and the meaning of Eddie's question sinks in. ]

Yeah, Oliver Queen. He- wait did you guys never meet? Do you not know?

[ There's a touch of delight in that last sentence, because... how could Eddie know? Oliver had been off faking evil for the League, once Eddie knew about Barry being the Flash. Probably no one had ever mentioned to him about Oliver's other life. ]

He's the Green Arrow. And would totally kill me if he knew I was telling anybody, but. He's not here, is he?

[ Cisco feels Eddie's hair after the rinse, decides that one more shampoo would be a good idea, just to be on the safe side. So he repeats that same process - dab of shampoo in his palm, work it into Eddie's hair until there was a proper lather, massage his scalp while working in the suds. Cisco scratches a little at Eddie's scalp, half by instinct, massaging just by his temples, and just above the nape of his neck, watching for Eddie's reaction to see if he liked that, at all. Which is... probably a little creepy, but Cisco just isn't going to think about that right now. ]

[Eddie manages to laugh at that, even while Cisco keeps massaging the soap through his hair, then lifts his hand and starts rinsing it out - and he tries to hold back, but can't, quite, when Cisco's warm hands start working water and suds through his hair. He groans, softly, in his throat, because it feels good, way too good.

A moment later, he's licking his lips and trying to focus on what Cisco is saying about Oliver.]

Good thing about that judgment-free zone, seriously. And uh, yeah. I've never met him, but I know of him. He was on Iris' three list.

[A shrug, and he's a bit surprised by how little that hurts to say, now, almost half a year removed from home. He's getting over it, bit by bit.]

And what, wait, really? Oliver Queen was the Arrow?

[His eyes are a little wide at that, and then Cisco is shampooing his hair again, and Eddie lets out another little groan of enjoyment, especially when Cisco's fingers dig in a little, just above his temples and at the nape of his neck, soothing away tension. It had been a rough few days, and the touch feels way better than it has any right to. With a soft hum, Eddie opens his eyes and looks up at Cisco.]

I'm still trying to reconcile silly playboy Oliver Queen with violet vigilante the Arrow. Weird.

[ It's just the steam from the warm water, Cisco tells himself, that makes him suddenly feel hot all over when Eddie groans like that. Only the steam and nothing else - definitely not going to let himself think about any other noises Eddie has ever made when he was very happy about being touched. No way. Not... gonna think about that. ]

Wait, she had a real list?

[ Privately, Cisco thinks Oliver isn't a bad choice for a list like that. Or, he thinks he would have thought so, before he'd interacted with him much. Between working with him a few times when Barry was around, and going over to Starling to redesign the Arrow cave and make new costumes for Oliver and his whole team, Cisco's gotten to know him a bit better. Now, he knows what a hot fucking disastrous mess it would be, and some of the shine has worn off. Sure, Oliver's gorgeous, and physically very much Cisco's type, but he's also an emotional trainwreck and incapable of having even a modicum of chill about anything, ever. Not a trait to be desired, in a sex partner, if you ask him. ]

Yep. Which I totally called, by the way. Well... mostly. He was on the short list for sure.

[ Eddie really is testing him with those groans; this time, Cisco can't help it. His hands pause, just for a moment, when Eddie makes that sound. He draws his bottom lip between his teeth, but there's no good way to say "quit it, that's kinda hot and it's distracting me" without immediately making things an 11/10 on the awkward scale. So instead he just tells himself to suck it up, and goes back to washing Eddie's hair. And it's pure altruism and platonic care that makes him repeat what he'd done to elicit that second groan, switching to a more deliberate scalp massage, pressing a bit harder around the base of Eddie's skull, working in small and hypnotic little circles. ]

I mean, you know about the whole castaway for years thing. We're not exactly buds, and it's not like he talks about it much, but... I get the strong sense that it wasn't all coconut trees and building signal fires. Pretty sure he actually spent a lot of that time with some really bad people getting tortured or whatever and came back with heaps of PTSD, intense archery skills, and not the greatest emotional support network. Which is a real bad combo for just about anybody.

She did.

[He laughs, softly, and shrugs.]

I did too, but I think she took it a little more seriously than I did. There was some real mooning going on when he was in town and hung out with Barry at Jitters. I heard all about it and, you know, it's hard to compete with a guy like Oliver.

[That, it turns out, does still sting, and he frowns a bit as Cisco comments that he called it, that Oliver was at least on his short list of people who might be the Arrow. Eddie tries to focus on that instead of remembering how he'd felt about Iris mooning over Oliver - not jealous, not really, but certainly inadequate.

It's easier to shift his focus from that when Cisco starts gently massaging his head. Eddie may not remember how to wash his hair, but he's pretty sure this isn't part of it, the way Cisco's fingers gently dig into his temples, around the base of his skull, rubbing away the tension. And honestly, he couldn't care less, because it feels good in a way Eddie hadn't realized he needed after a tense day taking care of dozens of people affected by amnesia. Softly, he groans again as some of the tension drains out of his muscles under Cisco's expert care, and some of the headache he's had off and on all day drains away with it.

He's only half-listening as Cisco explains why he thinks Oliver turned into the Arrow, but he makes a hum of acknowledgement in his throat, because he has the general idea. Opening his eyes a bit, making another little involuntary noise of pleasure in his throat, he sighs softly, looking up at Cisco.]

I guess when you put it that way, it makes sense.

[A pause, and then he speaks again, quietly.]

How did you get so good at this? There is no way a few shifts at a salon made you this good.

[ Cisco doesn't say anything, but from the brief lift of his eyebrows, he's not all that surprised. He'd already heard Barry complaining about that same mooning. At length. Barry had been feeling particularly insecure about the whole thing, and it would seem that, even with the distance of time and in an entirely different universe, Eddie's feeling a little insecure, too. ]

You're right. No competition. You're way better.

[ Oddly enough, that feeling of awkwardness, over his not-all-that-platonic feelings for Eddie, isn't really an issue when he declares that. This feels less like an admission of personal attraction and more like an objective statement of how not-all-that-desirable-after-all Oliver Queen is. ]

Sure he's got the jawline and whatever, but you've got that, too, and come on. Anybody that intense and gruff and incapable of taking a joke would be terrible in bed. Just terrible. I mean, think about it.

[ All the worst sex Cisco had had, had been with people who refused to just come out and actually communicate what they wanted, what they liked, or who were so over-serious that there was no joy in it, just anxious over-compensation and pretense.

It's gratifying, to see the way the simple scalp massage renders Eddie so totally blissed-out. He looks so serene, with his eyes closed, pale eyelashes resting against his slightly flushed cheeks. Cisco huffs a quiet laugh at the compliment, reaching down for the shower head and rinsing Eddie's hair once more. ]

Think I missed my true calling? If I ever get sick of being an engineer, maybe I got another option.

[ He finishes getting the last of the shampoo out, gently squeezes the excess water from Eddie's hair before he reaches down the conditioner. Once more, he puts some of it into his hands (less than he uses on himself, because Eddie has considerably less hair - both in length and to a degree in volume) and starts working it into Eddie's wet hair. ]

I can give you a shave, too, while this sits for a few minutes. I'm not really good at the whole rugged stubble thing, but I can shave you clean and you'll be back to being just the right amount of prickly in a couple days. Hopefully by then all this will be over and you can take it from there, and if not... we'll figure it out. Sound good?

Edited 2017-08-16 03:39 (UTC)

[Eddie blinks when Cisco says that there's no competition, that he's better than Oliver, and his head jerks up a little bit, eyes flicking up to Cisco's face. It's not the answer he was expecting - Eddie's seen Oliver Queen, with his perfect body and perfect amount of stubble and mysterious brooding and piercing blue eyes and all his money and charisma, and Eddie's got no idea why anyone would think that he was better. In any way, physical or not.

Cheeks flushing, he remembers for just a moment, the sensation of Cisco squirming against him, the noises he'd made, the soft gasps for breath, the way Cisco had touched him and how quickly things had amped up - it's a little easier to believe. And it's impossible not to feel a bit relieved when Cisco says that he thinks Oliver would be terrible in bed, because that probably means that Cisco hasn't slept with him. Eddie tries very hard not to think about why he's so relieved about that, especially when Cisco is rinsing his hair again, fingers combing gently through it, the tips of them rubbing gently against his scalp.]

I mean, I guess. But that guy is totally ripped, and he has a really good face, and a lot of money, you know? I don't have that. Not the same way. Anyway, it doesn't really matter, because he's not here, and neither is Iris, so there's nothing to feel threatened by, right?

[Licking his lips, he stays still, closing his eyes against the spray of water until Cisco is done rinsing his hair squeezing the excess water out of his hair. When Cisco asks if he missed his true calling and quips about having an option besides engineer, Eddie is too blissed out from the sensation of Cisco rubbing something else into his hair (he wasn't paying attention when Cisco picked up the bottle) to really do anything other than make a low, pleased 'mmmmm' of pleasure in the back of his throat. After a moment, though, it registers, and he exhales, opening his eyes.]

You're too good an engineer to give it up, but you could make a killing doing this as a side job. I'd pay you for it.

[A little grin, and he blinks a bit at the suggestion on a shave.]

Oh man, that would be great, I feel like...I don't know. Like someone glued a whole haystack to my face. It's itchy and gross right now, and you know what, usually I go clean shaven and then just leave it for a couple days.

[A little smile, and he sits up straight, facing Cisco a bit more, eyes on his face and bright with happiness and gratitude.]

You are seriously my lifesaver. How do you want me?

Right.

[ Cisco knows that Eddie is too relieved and relaxed right now to be guarding what he says too carefully, and it is rather interesting, hearing the way he talks about himself. Like there's some kind of checklist for perfection and he is constantly aware of how he ranks. To Cisco, it wouldn't really occur to him to break Eddie or Oliver down into subdivided categories (wealth, muscle mass, etcetera) and establish some kind of rubric. The fact that Eddie does think about himself like that sounds stressful, not to mention exhausting.

But he doesn't quite know how to articulate that observation without it sounding like psychobabble, or worse a criticism. He turns off the shower, goes to fetch his razor and some shaving cream from behind the bathroom mirror as he reassures simply: ]

Even if he were here, though, I'm telling you. No threat at all.

[ Cisco pulls down a washcloth, turns on the tap and waits for the water to get nice and hot. He puts a drop or two of lavender essential oil onto the cloth and rubs it in, because if he's going to do this, he might as well do it right. Once the water is hot enough it's steaming, he puts the washcloth under it, and says over his shoulder:]

You can stay right where you are, I got this. You might wanna sit up straight, though.

[ He turns back around, looks at where Eddie is sitting, patient and trusting, his hair damp and dripping a little on his shoulders. It looks darker, wet, and makes his eyes stand out more. Cisco has been trying to avoid looking at his body too much, because the last thing he wants is to make Eddie uncomfortable. But all that talk of Oliver had made Cisco think about the time he'd taken his measurement, so he could make the new Arrow costume. And that made him think about Oliver's scars, and in turn, meant scars were on his mind as he quickly glanced at Eddie where he sits.

Cisco turns off the tap, comes back over, perching on the edge of the tub once more and rubbing the now quite hot and aromatic washcloth carefully over Eddie's mouth and chin and neck, taking his time, knowing that this is one of the better parts of the whole process. Once he is finished, and starts applying the shaving cream itself, he asks: ]

Where'd you get that scar on your chest?

[The truth is, Cisco has perfectly assessed how Eddie's brain works, when it comes to perfection and his own self-judgement. And it is exhausting, constantly assessing himself based on this rubric of what a perfect guy should be, trying to improve his score on that internal rating, constantly judging himself. Eddie never feels good enough, not for anyone else, for himself, and he's feeling that way right now. Not quite good enough.

But Cisco is still reaching for the things he needs to shave him, while Eddie internally agonizes over whether he's anywhere near the league of Oliver Queen when it comes to being attractive and having money and a decent career and, apparently now also fighting bad guys in the streets. When Cisco says that even if he were here, there'd be no threat at all, Eddie blinks a bit, and smiles, eyes flicking up to Cisco's face as he brandishes a washcloth and razor.]

Okay. I'll stay right here.

[He's smiling a bit, at least until Cisco suddenly asks where he got the scar on his chest. Brows furrowing, Eddie looks down at the pink scar on his left pectoral from where he'd shot himself when he died. Cisco's seen it before, he's felt it before, they've talked about it before - Eddie's more than a little confused about the question.]

I got shot, remember?

[A moment after he speaks he remembers - amnesia, people forgetting things, and maybe this...Eddie's death...is something that Cisco's forgotten. Brows furrowing a bit more, he shrugs, tries to change the subject, because he isn't sure he wants to explain his death right now.]

Anyway, I seriously doubt that if Oliver Queen were here, I'd be any kind of competition for him. He'd probably own this place in a week.

I think you are overestimating his ability to accomplish anything without Diggle and Felicity there to help. The dude's great with a bow and arrow, but strategy and like, planning? Not his strong suit. And don't even get me started on people skills.

[ Cisco feels just the tiniest bit bad, for dragging Oliver this much, but only for a moment. If it'll be a little boost to Eddie's ego, what's the harm? And besides... it is true. When he'd been on his own, Oliver had pretty much just murdered people and thought that was a sustainable way to fix things.

He finishes smoothing the shaving cream over Eddie's neck, chin, jaw, and up his cheeks as far as it needs to go. Cisco picks up the razor, and takes a moment to orient himself. He may have washed hair for other people plenty of times before, but he's never shaved another person before. Still, he is relatively confident in his manual dexterity.

During that pause, he looks again at Eddie's chest, unembarrassed now that it's clear he's not just checking him out. His stomach seems to drop a little at what he sees. He reaches out with his free hand, cautious but also curious. ]

I know Tockman shot you during the blackout 'cause Barry talked about seeing you in the hospital. [ He gently touches a fingertip to the small round scar nearer to Eddie's shoulder, which looks older than the other scars. ] And I know John stabbed you a couple months ago... [ He moves that fingertip to the scar that more clearly looks like it was made by a knife, and which also looks the newest. ] ...but there's this one, too. Did you get stabbed and shot twice?!

[ He again slides that fingertip over to the small scar directly over Eddie's heart, a little furrow forming between his brows. He looks up at Eddie, confused, but a little in awe, too. ]

I swear to god you've got nine lives, dude.

[Eddie smiles a bit, tilting his head, eyes falling half-shut.]

Maybe, but if he came here, you would be helping him, and I'm pretty sure you're better than Felicity and Diggle combined. No offense to them, especially Diggle, who is someone I don't actually know at all but who has kind of a silly name. And I don't know about my people skills, but okay.

[A pause, and then he laughs softly, watching as Cisco sprays shaving cream into his hand and then tilting his chin up so Cisco can rub it onto his face. He doesn't anticipate how good it's going to feel as Cisco starts rubbing it into his face, his jaw and throat and cheeks, scraping fingertips over his stubble.]

Mm. [A little noise of pleasure.] But fine. I'll let you pretend you like me more than Oliver Queen.

[The more Cisco rubs the shaving cream into his face, the more distracted he gets, his eyes sinking shut as Cisco does it, making another little hum of pleasure, and this isn't fair at all, how good Cisco is with his hands. And how much the timing is against them, how much he wants to kiss him again, right now.

But then Cisco is asking about the scar again, and touching it with his fingertip, so gentle and tentative, and that cuts right through his distraction. Blinking, Eddie looks up at him. For a moment, his brain flusters and scrabbles for something to tell him, because right now he doesn't want to talk about how he'd died, doesn't want to make Cisco stop smiling like that, doesn't know the extent of what he's forgotten.]

I got shot just before I came here. It's not really important though, it's okay.

[A pause, and then, when Cisco says he's got nine lives, something in Eddie's gut twinges, and he can't help the way he glances away, his expression tightening.]

Yeah...I guess.

[ Cisco chuckles in delight when Eddie jokes about Diggle's name being a little silly, because yeah, it is. He's thought that too, before, but never actually said it to anyone. ]

I like you way more than Oliver Queen.

[ He doesn't know what's going on with Eddie, but he's being pretty uncharacteristically vague about that scar. Usually, Eddie is more than willing to come forward and just explain things, even when it's a little bit unpleasant. So the fact that he doesn't is kind of a hint. It makes Cisco really fucking curious, but he decides to drop it, giving a little shrug and then starting in with the razor.

He is cautious, taking his time, making sure to go against the grain, to get as close as he can but not press too hard or cut. Cisco is most tentative right when he begins, but then he gradually settles into it, using his other hand to tilt Eddie's head this way and that as needed. He knows that Eddie can't really speak while he's doing this, for fear of messing him up, so Cisco takes it on himself to fill the silence. ]

So my dad was gone a lot of the time 'cause of work stuff, which is... a whole other conversation but it means that I learned to shave from my big brother, who for once in his life decided not to be a total dick and was actually pretty patient all things considered.... I was one of those kids that started getting facial hair pretty young and I was like, soooo dramatic and worried about cutting myself, like one little nick and I was gonna start gushing blood like a firehose and die on the spot... but he made sure I knew how to hold the razor right and which spots would be tricky and how to go slow but not TOO slow...

[ Talking while he works has the added bonus of calming the last of his nerves, helping him to focus on the actual manual task of shaving Eddie. Stroke by stroke he makes his way across Eddie's neck, then jaw, eyes never moving away from the task. After almost no time at all, all the having cream is gone, and Cisco reaches forward, absently tracing along Eddie's skin for any patches he might have missed. ]

[Eddie wants to protest that Cisco is biased, but he has to keep his mouth shut because Cisco is shaving him now, drawing the razor against his skin with careful, delicate precision. There is something about this that makes Eddie feel more cared for than he has in years, pampered. The room smells faintly of lavender and shave cream and conditioner, and the unique blend of scents makes him think of Cisco, because these are his products, the things he uses to groom himself. When Eddie leaves here, he's going to smell just a little like Cisco, and that feels nice, in a way that Eddie is a little ashamed of.

There's something else, also shamefully nice, about the careful and gentle way Cisco shaves him, being incredibly careful not to nick him or cut him, scraping off the hair and the shaving cream as he drags blades against his skin, that he knows is going to linger in his mind. The fact he trusts Cisco to do that, something so intimate and that runs the risk of injuring his face or throat, and that he trusts him without question feels good and safe and wonderful.

When Cisco tells him that story about Dante, Eddie's eyes track to his face, and his mouth curves into a slight smile. It's a cute story, though it has sad undertones, like most of Cisco's stories about his family, and Eddie listens to every word, because Cisco doesn't often talk about his family, especially not good stories about how his brother hadn't been an asshole for a while. And while Cisco is looking for places he might have missed, and Eddie can talk again, he smiles a bit wider.]

You're biased, by the way. About me versus Oliver. Anyway, it seems like Dante was a good teacher when he wanted to be, because my face feels amazing. And you know, I'm gonna smell like you now, for a while.

[He regrets it the moment he says it, and his cheeks flush, but he doesn't take it back, just glances off to the side.]

[open] cancel your reservations

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