exploration mingle: branching out

[riverviewmod]

who: everyone in Riverview!
what: exploration mingle: branching out
when: August 15 - October 15
where: the quarantine, the delta, the jungle, and the forest
warnings: threads may contain violence, body horror, and discussion of injuries and illness; please put any necessary warnings in the subject lines

branching out

One of the major and most highly-valued cultural concepts in Riverview is that of exploration, expansion. Especially now that, with the recent influx of new arrivals, as the portal kicks into high gear for reasons not entirely known, the Inhabited City, already comfortably full, is rapidly becoming overpopulated. With all the refugees from other worlds pouring in from day to day, the city's safe space and resources are being taxed to their breaking point.

Right now, exploration and expansion is key, and the government is really focusing on exploration objectives, in order to unite citizens in expanding, securing, and supplying the city for everyone's benefit.

the story so far

Exploration & Expansion Progress Report ● Plotting & Questions ● Reward Submissions ● First Teams

It's normal to see drop-ships hovering in the sky over the Quarantine, of course, since the city is not self-sufficient just yet, and receives regular shipments of supplies, technology, merchandise, food, books, movies, and all sorts of other things from the Capital World. However, the number of drop-ships coming down has recently started to triple in frequency.

On August 10th, an announcement started being run on the Quarantine's networks, television stations, and on digital display boards throughout the city explaining the situation - Mayor Dichard explained in an official mayoral address that the Quarantine is in the process of taking in refugees from a planet in the solar system which recently became uninhabitable due to a massive natural disaster. Hundreds of people are flooding the city, and many of them are wounded, sick, or otherwise in acute distress.

How is a city already stretched to the limit for population capacity going to handle all these new arrivals...?

how it works

● ADDITIONAL OOC INFO: The refugee aliens are called the Frysh; they are humanoid mammalian and have a similar internal physiology to humans, however, they look somewhat insectoid, with mandibles, slightly shiny skin that is smoother and harder to the touch than human skin, and delicate wings that aren't capable of carrying the weight of the body (they cannot fly). Their skin ranges from pale to dark gray, and they have mottled or spotted/freckled markings in a wide variety of warm earth tones on their faces, necks, backs, and the outside of the thighs; their blood is dark rusty brown and slightly more viscous than human blood; eye colors are very widely varied. Average height is 6 feet, and doesn't vary based on sex (the species has male/female/neutral). The aging process is similar to that of humans, and refugees come in all ages. The species is very high-tech, but the tech is mostly related to entertainment rather than weaponry, medical, etc. as the planet the species lived on was quite utopian and basic needs were always taken care of by tech that was left on the planet when it was destroyed.

● Phases: Each prompt is a different phase of the operation. Characters may partake in whichever part of the operation they choose, whether it is a large and prominent part, or a more of a backseat or support role. Characters may participate in as many phases as they wish.

● Completion: When the next exploration mingle goes up, the mission featured on this exploration mingle will be considered complete, and game canon, providing the entry has 200+ comments on it.

● Thread Rewards: For this mingle, I have created five different items as rewards - two for the first prompt, and three for the remaining three. Any character participating in a completed thread with at least one other character, for any phase prompt by October 15 will be able to pick a keyword corresponding to one of these rewards when they submit the thread at the link above. Every character participating in a completed thread will be eligible to receive an item. Completed threads must take place on this entry.
ETA August 20th: New characters who complete a thread on August's Test Drive meme with the Tent City prompt, and who are accepted into the game are also eligible for a thread reward for Phase I only.

● Entry Reward: The reward for completion of this month's exploration objective will be expansion of the City, a more reliable electrical and power grid, and some new setting features as the Inhabited City grows in size.

phase i: tent cities

Unfortunately, this influx of refugees is going to be causing a serious overpopulation problem - for now, since it is summer, the new arrivals will be housed in makeshift tent cities set up in Riverview Central Park as well as other smaller parks around the city, any spare empty lots, along the banks of the river, and in a few of the sports fields. The resources of the city are going to be taxed to their limit, and while the Capital World will be contributing funds and helping to get together building supplies, Riverview's intrepid citizens are going to have to find ways to supply more space to build shelters for the refugees, and more power to supply the electrical grid in the city.

However, it's not just the explorers that are able to help out with this particular problem. Any citizen who wishes is more than welcome to attend the tent cities where makeshift field hospitals have been set up with as many medical amenities as possible. While serious and life-threatening injuries or illnesses are taken to the Riverview Hospital, people who need first aid or more minor or moderate tending can attend the field hospitals and recover in their temporary homes. Volunteers are requested to help with many different tasks - medical staff to help heal the injured and ill, anyone capable to cook and serve at soup kitchens, members of the Perimeter Guard, police, or other capable fighters to secure the tent cities and make sure there's no violence or theft happening, and drivers and laborers to help bring supplies from the drop-ships and other parts of the city to keep the tent cities supplied. Of course, there are going to be a lot of other jobs that come up on the fly, so everyone is welcome.

phase ii: the delta

With fall rapidly approaching, and with it the colder weather, it's urgent that housing is set up for these new arrivals, and with new housing comes a need for more electricity. The electrical grid is already stretched to its limits with the current population in the city, and is essentially being held together with duct tape and hope - with all these new arrivals and their needs, there's no way the current grid can handle it.

Thankfully, during a recent exploratory fly-over, an electrical installation set in one of the massive waterfalls near the edge of the Abandoned City was noted. While at the time it seemed too far away from established civilization to risk a large expedition, things have changed with the new influx of refugees, and the installation seems like the best hope to bring more energy into the city. Characters who participate in Phase II will be taking watercraft down the river to the delta just above the waterfalls, finding the installation, and checking to see if it can be restored to functionality so the power it generates from the waterfall can be used in the city.

The dangers faced by people taking on Phase II will be primarily related to the long trek needed to get to the installation, down the river - a relatively straight-forward, old fashioned adventurous exploration mission. While using watercraft will help speed up the process, the river is heavily populated by monsters and predators who have flourished in the absence of civilization. Expect mutated piranhas, crocodiles, carnivorous fish, and just about anything else that lives in or near a river to try to take a swipe at the teams making their way to the installation. Once inside the installation, there will be the hazards associated with a damp building that hasn't been used by people in over a decade - it's in poor repair, will have structural damage, and the likely-malfunctioning tech means that electricity and water are almost guaranteed to meet at some point. This prompt would be well-suited to engineers, skilled laborers/construction workers, and fighters; people who can fix the damage to the installation and those who can protect everyone along the way.

For any thread completed under this prompt, whether or not characters made it to the delta, all participating characters will receive rewards.

phase iii: the jungle

The second line of exploration will be into the jungle north of the city, where fly-overs have located a series of skyscrapers and flat ground, overgrown with plant life and obviously left empty since quite a while before the Abandoned City was left behind. Despite being long abandoned, however, the buildings and land seem to be pretty well-preserved and would be usable with a bit of work and maybe a touch of magic. With the flat area cleared out, it would make a perfect helipad for transport and with a temporary fence that could be easily built up after the area is cleared, this could be the start of a smaller city that could eventually be connected by transit or cleared land and fences with the Quarantine proper! Adding this extra space would easily house all the refugees and some of the excess population from the Quarantine, which would be a major advantage for everyone in the city.The government wastes no time in dispatching teams from the Perimeter Guard and welcoming the inclusion of regular citizens with a taste for exploration, to head out into the jungle and see whether this could be a viable solution.

But why would what looks like such an easy area to inhabit have been left alone and outside city walls for so long?

Well, exploratory teams will soon find out - as they make their way through the jungle toward the buildings, characters will start to notice that the animals and monsters in the jungle are getting increasingly...strange. Rather than otherworldly creatures that still make sense, they look like weird, mutated combinations of animals, a mashup of teeth and eyes and fur and scales and claws that don't belong together. As the teams move further, they'll start to notice that some of these creatures are taking on plant-like qualities as well, vines winding into flesh and extending like tentacled appendages from monsters that are increasingly larger and more misshapen. After a point, they're almost incomprehensible blobs of melded flesh and plant life that can't move, can only sit and snap or swipe or grasp for prey.

It isn't just the monsters either. The trip out to the skyscrapers will take at least four days on foot for the fastest and fittest people in the Quarantine, and going by foot is the only way to get there, considering there's no cleared space large enough to land craft, and due to the unknown nature of the area around the skyscrapers, magic is not to be used to travel there. Day One of the trip will be pretty normal, aside from the surroundings starting to get weird, but on Day Two, characters will start to feel and see changes. Whether they're taking on physical traits of other members of their teams, or the creatures and plants around them, they will start to subtly change, whether it's eye or hair color, scales or claws or even superpowers or abilities, they'll start to 'trade' traits with people and creatures around them. On Day Three, it gets significantly worse, with characters starting to meld together with animals and plants around them, becoming more and more amalgamated with the world around them, whether it's vines under their skin or growing a tail, or any combination. By Day Four, characters will be experiencing intense changes to the very fabric of themselves, their physical bodies morphing and twisting into things that are completely alien while their minds stay mostly the same.

The level of transformation experienced and the amount of physical pain and damage that the transformation causes to individual characters is up to player discretion, and characters that feel unable to handle the effects of the jungle route are more than welcome to turn back whenever they want. However, if any teams make it to the skyscrapers they will find that the buildings are inhabitable and the area would be easily cordoned off with fences, though the buildings are covered with mosses, fungi, and leafy herbs that seem unaffected by the mutations. Teams will find that as they turn back toward the city, the effects wear off as they leave the area, in exact reverse to how they appeared.

For any thread completed under this prompt, whether or not characters made it to the skyscrapers, all participating characters will receive rewards. The first team that makes it to the skyscrapers, collects samples of the fungi and moss, and makes it back to the city should respond in this thread to receive the "solution" to what is happening in the area and how the area can become inhabitable.

phase iv: the forest

The jungle isn't the only option for new areas to inhabit. The same fly-over expedition covered the deciduous forest to the south of the Quarantine, and discovered a sprawling, walled compound, overgrown with thick, lush vegetation. The compound seems to have its own water sources, an orchard, garden areas, and places to keep farm animals, as well as ample space where wild game can roam - just about any herbivorous creature you can imagine seems to have found a home here.

The most important part? Despite looking like plain old tall, thick stone walls that could easily be stomped down by some of the bigger predators in the woods, they are obviously doing their job. There isn't a single break in the walls and despite being in ill repair, the whole area looks pretty safe. On top of that, it's big enough to house the refugees and then some in relative comfort and self-sufficiency, enough that they could easily survive long enough to build a safe method of transport out to the compound so residents there could access the city with ease.

Just like the jungle skyscrapers, though, one wonders why no one is living there anymore. Unlike the jungle, however, the day-long trip out to the compound is relatively uneventful. Besides the usual predators in the area, there's nothing untoward, no unspeakable horror like what's going on in the jungle. At least, not until the team makes their way to the compound and opens the heavy gate to let themselves inside. Once they're there and exploring to make sure the area is safe to inhabit (a task that will take at least four days considering the amount of ground covered by the compound) is when strange things start happening.

It starts on Day One, with team members noticing strange apparitions out of the corners of their eyes. Like ghosts, they flit in and out of peripheral vision, make the sound of footsteps behind the person on night watch, touch an explorer's shoulder from behind when they're not looking, and immediately disappear when looked at directly. On Day Two, the apparitions will start to stick around longer, and look familiar, with explorers seeing things that trigger bad feelings, like fear or anger or grief. By Day Three the apparitions will be an almost constant presence, hovering around, visible to everyone, exposing the worst of every member of the team - images of dead loved ones, the scent of perfume or death, the sounds of an explorer's most guilty memory, all of it is there, ready to expose their darkest secrets to everyone around them. On Day Four, the apparitions will start to become more than that, physically attacking characters, enticing them blindly into dangerous places, and otherwise trying to kill them.

The types of apparitions experienced and the amount of exposure of dark secrets is up to player discretion, and characters who are unable to handle the events unfolding are more than welcome to leave and go back to the city. Teams that remain in the compound and explore for the full four days will eventually find a building near the center of the compound, with heavily riveted metal doors that have the words "Central Hub" spray paint stenciled on them and complicated electronic deadbolt locks.

For any thread completed under this prompt, whether or not characters made it to the Central Hub, all participating characters will receive rewards. The first team that makes it to the Central Hub and gets the doors open (in whatever way possible) should respond in this thread to receive the "solution" to what is happening in the area and how the area can become inhabitable.

phase v: wildcard

Have an idea for a mission-adjacent plot, or want to make up an unexpected plot twist or problem and solve it with your character? Just write up a starter, and don't forget to give yourself credit by submitting it for the Progress Report.

visual inspiration

click on thumbnails for larger view

Credit: image i: Daniel Gstir; image ii: Steven Cormann; image iii: Tom Nemeth

navigation

Comments

iv. [closed to Poe, Finn, John, and Roy]

[volitaunt]

[ Poe doesn't trust the quiet on their way out for a second.

He's been in Riverview too long, he's seen too many weird things, to just assume that a place like this would be uninhabited for no reason. They all sense it, really. They're all on edge, even as they set up camp and plan out how they're going to do recon tomorrow. They're outside the city limits, and that could mean anything.

Maybe it's paranoia, when they start to hear whispers. Maybe it's just their imaginations, when they hear footsteps and turn to find no one there. The sound of their own steps bounding back at them off some unseen surface. It's probably nothing.

It's totally nothing, right? ]

[shootsoff]

[Roy might not have been in Riverview for as long as any of his companions, but he's seen enough weird crap even at home to be a little on edge out in the woods, outside the wall. He's seen the monsters, seen the other dangers that can catch a person off-guard, so he's definitely keeping his eyes open for things.

At first he thinks the flashes of figures in the trees, slightly glowing, are his imagination. It's not like he's never seen imaginary stuff out of the corner of his eye before, he's done enough drugs to know better than to believe every little peripheral vision flicker. But when he starts to hear the sounds of a motorcycle revving in the distance, in the middle of freakin' nowhere in the forest, that's when he figures something's going down.

Doesn't mention it though. He really, really doesn't want to look like a crazy person in front of the guy he's starting to think of as a friend (or, okay, maybe more) and his friend from home and John Sheppard, who he knows he made a total crap impression on before and who is running the recon team he kind of wants to be part of. Nope. No way. Not gonna do it.

But when they all settle down outside their tents in camp, and he's squatting by the fire, poking it with a stick, he hears it again. And he sees how jumpy and on edge everyone looks. And he can't help it.]

Uhhhh, so I'm gonna bring up the elephant in the room. Are you guys also seeing and hearing weird shit out here?

[bythehand]

[ Finn is naturally given to being on edge, most days. Sometimes that's just the way that life turns out. High alert is easier than relaxing, and relaxing has no place on an important small-unit expedition into dangerous territory anyway.

It can be easy to dismiss movement out of the corners of their eyes in the wilderness. Even things that look dangerously familiar, in a stomach-lurching kind of way, only to see nothing concrete on a turn. Like sure, stuff in the wind, animals, odd shadows-- easy to rationalize, if only for the benefit of moving on more quickly. The sounds are not so easy to rationalize, from content to sheer impossible variety. Distant engines, shouts. What it sounds like when blaster fire echoes off of stone walls.

Basically this forest sucks. Roy's question only helps confirm the truth. Finn won't leave him hanging. ]

Yeah. Have a pretty bad feeling about that.

[ He's just gonna let the overall jumpiness duke it out with the shades of resignation he automatically assigns to anything that screams "Riverview doing something magical that I personally dislike". That seems like a good personal choice. ]

hot finnteraction prompts Click Here

[bythehand]

[ Opens by saying one-on-one threads are rad, but I would definitely rather pre-coordinate/hash out anything with 3 or more people involved. You're all on my plurk, it's fine, I'm super happy to plot whatever.

Finn is, uh. Reticent for the most part, when it comes to any of the things that are easier to pretend to ignore. Not beyond the sort of base reacting that comes with it, meeting eyes with someone as if to say it's not just you, we all heard it, the fireside conversation trying to figure out what to make of it all. But not keen to drag out-- any sort of admission, maybe. Owning any of those sounds or corner-of-the-eye flashes. And some of them, he does know. Blasters firing. Fleeting glimpses of black and white and chrome, or indistinct figures in fraying, muted fabrics. The smell of smoke and ozone.

He's cagey about his history on a good day. This sets him more on edge than he's used to being, and that makes it no exception to the caginess rule. There are four of them on this team, right? Let it all bleed together. Likely as not, nobody wants to go digging.

Of course, like most things he decides to handle by actively refusing to acknowledge them, there's only so much time before that stops being a viable option. Welcome to day four, where we hear strange sounds that we go to investigate for the sake of a secure perimeter, or where we catch sight of things just familiar or unsettling enough to try to track them down. When I think about it this is by and large a very impulse-driven team. Yikes.

All of these ghost options are definitely going to include mean ghosts yelling mean stuff eventually. I'm leaning into it with the florence + the machine references. ]


i. seven devils.

[ Some of the inherent problem that goes hand in hand with apparitions hell-bent on inspiring fear or grief or anger, in exposing dark secrets or cutting guilt, is that Finn's guiltiest memories are comprised of things he's not necessarily set to run into and fight against.

While there's still something to be said for guilt and anger as far as his history with the First Order goes-- at least as far as Roy is concerned, being the only person on this particular crew who hasn't heard it or witnessed it for themselves-- Finn's hangups ultimately more towards the events in that history than the association itself.

He was deployed twice before defecting. Both of those deployments involved being stood in front of innocent people and told to fire. He never did. Which, surprisingly, does very very little to put a balm on the instinctive guilt, the long pushed down myriad of emotions associated with those missions. He's talked about Jakku maybe once or twice in nearly a year of quarantine. His first deployment, how it ended, how it sat-- well, that's always been a lot farther down.

Finn is not ready to round a turn and find an out of place civilian. Not one of the villagers from Jakku, dirt-smeared and disheveled. Not any of the miners or negotiators from his first deployment, sickly and malnourished, maybe even sporting an injury already. Maybe more than one at a time, some odd facsimile of flanking, closing in ranks around him. It's safe to say that on the list of things he's ready or prepared to deal with at any given point in time, this definitely isn't it.

The most popular apparition mood of the day is along the lines of saying you just stood there.

This maybe isn't fine.

He doesn't raise his rifle. ]


ii. heavy.

[ Or hey, all aboard the more straightforward other guilt train. This is a much shorter prompt, and it's mostly because I'm losing my steam. But it's also just more straightforward in general.

Sometimes, when you're on an expedition in the woods, malicious apparitions like to really get on in there and remind you of all the good times. That time your teammate you used to look out for and felt responsible for died right in front of you. That time you defected from a lifetime of conditioning and part of you feels guilty for being the only one out no matter how little sense it makes to feel bad about it.

It's the little things.

So this is essentially for all those more direct First Order-based incidents.

Join Finn as he tries to yeet himself right over to the ghost of a dying Slip and immediately gets punched in the face. More of a guilt trip ghost. Not a ghost who's good at fighting. Which doesn't help Finn much because I think at basically any point in these prompts it's safe to assume he's losing his shit in some capacity. Meet Finn's other old teammate, Nines, who is still operating on this anger level, yes. Help PVP Captain Phasma, roughly 6'4 of swole, chrome-plated malconent, because galaxy-brain level fear is the thought that he'll literally never be done with her in any respect.

All that sort of content, which I promise I'll write with much more gravitas as it happens. If you've got no specific preferences, I'll randomize it up! nbd. ]


iii. wildcard.

[ for... all the rest! things not listed! pre-day-four nonsense. aftermath convos. the discussion of how ethical it is to keep roasting porgs. you feel me. this is a no-good, very bad day all around. finn will punch your ghosts for you if you want. ]

ii H*E*A*V*Y*!

[volitaunt]

[ I RNG'd already so GUESS WHAT hi Nines!

It started with a noise in the woods, another noise in the woods, one Poe didn't recognize but Finn sure seemed to. Poe wasn't about to let Finn go off on his own, not now, not with all of this happening, not when he's been seeing the ghosts of his pilots everywhere and has heard his mother's voice more than once.

It's three parts wanting to protect Finn, one part not wanting to be alone with whatever comes looking for him.

Poe raises his gun, training it on the apparition's head for all the good that will do. ]

Finn, you okay?

[bythehand]

[ A potent, valid question from Poe. Finn, to lay on the pun while we're all here to witness it, is definitely looking in the general zone of someone who's seen a ghost. He's not even sure why he's so surprised, really.

He knew.

He heard, and he knew. Even before seeing him. From a distance, in an echo, from a lineup of any number of people-- he could pick Nines out anywhere. Pick out any of his old teammates.

Nines scoffs at them. As if that question is part of a game he's tired of hearing about.

It's been a long time since Finn saw his face; the close-cropped red hair, the unsettlingly intense blue of his eyes, the undisguised twist of his expressions. Feels like a long time. Feels like it hurts, knowing what's under the helmet, like grief and panic clawing their way up his throat all at once. There's no reconcile, with Nines, he knows. He knew on Takodana. Somehow it doesn't make it hurt less.

He wonders if Zeroes is even still alive.

Finn takes a step forward, impulsively. Stops. Registers the words a little late. ]

Not sure yet.

[ Nines isn't content to stop at one step. He starts forward with intent, riot control baton sparking to life in his hand-- accuses, not disguising his distaste, "You still think you're better than us." ]

[volitaunt]

[ Poe instinctively grabs Finn's bicep, stepping up beside him as his friend moves forward. ]

Who--?

[ Then the ghost speaks, and that narrows down the scope of who by a lot. Poe's grip on Finn tightens. ]

Go to hell.

[ This directed at Nines, an instinctive anger that Poe can't unleash on his own whispers. He pulls his gun with his free hand, leveling it at the approaching ghost and opening fire. Three quick shots, three useless shots, and Poe grits his teeth, trying to pull Finn back as Nines comes on. ]

[bythehand]

[ It's amazing how easy it is for one sentence to peel off a layer of muted shock. There it goes. All but dust in the wind. The gunshots help with that, too, in fairness. It would be hard not to get a little jarred back into reality by that.

This is, very possibly, not the time or the place to stare at a dead person and dissociate. Finn lets out a slow breath that he hadn't realized he was holding. Gives Poe the grace of stepping back again with him, though not especially far.

Smoke and mirrors and things he tries not to think about. All the ways it's easier to see in hindsight how much of the resentful chill in the air must have been aimed at him, not just Slip, those last few weeks of cadet training. The way Nines sparred him, so wildly and unrestrained that he'd wondered if Nines thought it was real--

Nines snarls "I'll see you there." The bullets don't work, and that provides some of the relief of driving in that this, today, isn't real, in any of the more upsetting ways to consider.

Finn tries ignoring him for a second. Long enough to at least give a little context to Poe's cut-off question. It's something to focus on. That's always good. He's never exactly a fan of explaining things from ye olden First Order days, beyond convenient intel, but sometimes life turns things a little more obvious and necessary to have to mention.

Poe knows more than anyone else, anyway.

This could have been worse. ]

So I mentioned I was on a four-man fire-team. Before. [ He's trying to sound casual, and it's working exactly as well as it has ever worked. ] This is Nines.

[ Nines yells traitor, possibly solely because he's been ignored or maybe because he's still exactly that mad, but it's not worth the quotation marks. Sort of... you know, definitely already heard that one. The threat of his approach is slightly undercut by the fact that he clips through a low-hanging fringe of leaves like an especially convincing hologram for a moment.

He's revving up for his diss track. ]

He's dead.

[ Fun trivia? Well. Trivia. ]

[volitaunt]

Goo.... [ Poe's impulse is to say good, but he catches himself on the first half of the syllable. This is one of the people from Finn's fire-team. This is one of Finn's former companions. For all he knows, before Finn's defection, Nines could have been in the same emotional category as Slip.

So he just tightens his grip on Finn's arm, a protectively little gesture. It's not like there's much else he can do, except shoot this ghostly figure again and that did a whole lot of good the first time.

Why doesn't this place give them things they can fight? ]

Let's go, Finn. Let's just... walk away. He's not gonna say anything you need to hear.

[ Finn's presence is the only reason Poe suggests it. Left to his own devices he'd probably stand here fighting with a ghost until it got frustrated and found a ghostly way to punch him in the head. Particularly if that ghost isn't one of his own.

There's a voice on the air, though. A voice he knows he recognizes, a voice he's maybe trying to block out. A murmur that says You did this, echoed again and again by more and more people until the whisper billows around them like a light wind.

This time, when Poe's grip tightens on Finn's arm yet again, it's for very different reason. ]

[bythehand]

[ He almost laughs. A little 0 for 2 on appropriate knee-jerk reactions between them, something he's left to kind of uncomfortably swallow on the spot. "Good" might be better than "I'm sorry."

Finn is becoming more starkly certain that Nines flat-out hated his guts, in hindsight. Even before he defected. Nature and design of training. Soldiers like Slip, to their line of thinking, were one thing; dead weight fell off one way or another. Making someone look bad by comparison was another entity.

Every time Phasma singled him out, she was all but ensuring he'd never really fit. That there would be other cadets running themselves ragged on the sharp edges of competition and resentment for a chance to knock him down a peg.

Maybe it was supposed to improve performances. Maybe it was supposed to nip his attachment issues in the bud.

He might have to write a full thesis before he can ever explain it. If he can ever explain it. So he just lets the strange little laugh bubble fester and sink down like a large stone. Can't push "it's fine" out past it yet. Maybe later. Maybe later, maybe Poe has a point.

"You didn't have a problem getting your hands dirty when we were the ones in the way."

The point becomes moot. If it weren't for the subtle shift in Poe's tension, enough to have Finn reflexively reaching over to brace him right back, the unmistakable swell of whispering-- Finn would already be halfway to meeting Nines in the ghost pit. He's not ruling it out for good, actually. ]

I would love to go on any kind of mission that doesn't turn into a disaster. [ Is what he manages, in part because it's very much the first thought that pops into his head and in part because he wants to establish to Poe that he's still here. More or less.

They're both at least half in this forest. ]

[volitaunt]

Wouldn't know what to do with ourselves if one did.

[ They've been functioning on one degree or another of crisis management for the better part of a year. (Almost a year, and isn't that a shock--one to be dealt with later.)

It's only his grip on Finn that keeps Poe from throwing down with the facsimile of Nines himself. Anything to avoid the murmuring in the woods.

Except all at once the murmuring stops, and the ghost of Paige Tico steps out of thin air to stand beside Nines.

"Both of you kill your own people. The only difference is how."

Poe's breath catches and then leaves him all at once. He's airless, the circle of support he's holding with Finn the only thing keeping him remotely steady. Being able to see through Paige is like a nightmare, the kind of dream he'd have in the nights after she disappeared from Riverview, returned to whatever world and life (death) she chose.

If he's honest with himself, he never really got past it. Seeing her alive, trying to lead her through her own grief, having her disappear when he was just starting to think that maybe, maybe, he was getting a second chance. It still makes him wake up sweating, like a thousand thousand other things that he and Finn share but never talk about. ]

Paige.... [ His eyes flick to Nines, to Finn, back to Paige.

He doesn't know any more what he's supposed to do. ]

[bythehand]

[ They make some sort of picture right now. Half clinging, half holding each other back. Regretting more or less every life decision that's led them here.

Paige appearing is a simpler thing for Finn in a lot of ways. More out and out sad than anything else at first, the emotional equivalent of accidentally missing a step when it sets in just how clearly not there she really is.

And then trickles in the beginnings of anger again. Because it's not enough that they're here, it's not enough that they can't just make these ghosts fade back out or avoid them entirely--

Maybe Finn didn't know everything there is to know about Paige Tico, maybe there wasn't enough time to really get to do that, but he knows that's the least Paige Tico thing he's ever heard. Accusatory. Unkind.

It's an insult. He finds himself, to put it very lightly, offended on more than one person's behalf, and none of those people are him. ]

She didn't think that. You know she didn't think that.

[ He hopes Poe knows she didn't think that. What soldier would? Let alone a friend?

"You're cowards." The thing is, he can believe Nines thought just about anything that Nines seems inclined to say right now. It's not hard to imagine.

"How hard was it to decide you deserved to live more than the rest of us?" Paige is still making him mad just for the sheer audacity, in a refreshing update.

Finn pulls at Poe, as best he can, for all the world like maybe if he pushes him around and stands in front of him, he will magically be able to block out all the sound. And then he enacts part two of his plan he's only just started to make up, which is to just try to stride right over there really quick. The magic sound blocking he has in mind could be primarily made up of his own arguing. ]

[volitaunt]

Finn--!

[ Poe keeps pace with him, wondering on some level what the hell Finn is doing, wondering on another if he can take being that close to Paige's shade. Finn says she didn't think it, that Poe has to know she didn't think it, and he tries to reassure himself that Finn is right. Finn is right.

It's just Poe thinks it himself enough that it's hard to disbelieve it when it comes from someone else. ]

That isn't it. That wasn't it.

[ She turns transparent eyes on him, expression cool and distant in a way he never, ever saw Paige's expression.

"You just got lucky. You just kept your distance while the rest of us went in." ]

My weapons systems were down.

[ It's a stupid, frail excuse. Poe grits his teeth, helplessness making his temper flare. ]

What are you, huh? Either of you. You just gonna stand there talking at us or are you going to do something real?

[bythehand]

[ Don't worry. Finn definitely doesn't know what the hell he's doing.

Some tiny part of him is wondering why here, why now, if they're trying to keep them in this spot. Is there a reason? Does it matter? Would it have happened anywhere? All these questions and more.

And Nines says, "Slip was dead weight, but at least he didn't turn his back on us. At least he died a stormtrooper."

And all those questions and more are gone like so much dust in the wind. Off they fly.

Finn used to think he was more scared than angry. Way back when he first got here, back when he defected. He spent his first two months waiting for a fleet to appear out of nowhere, he spent his first days waiting to get captured or killed or reset, somehow. And after the fear started to trickle out-- after the Supremacy and Crait-- anger filtered in to replace it. Like there was a numbness that wore off, left him all too aware of a mass of live wires in his chest. Anger got easy.

(And beneath them, something cracked, so raw to the touch that he's been grateful to have it covered with a feeling he does know how to live with. He's terrified of what happens if the anger shakes loose, if he runs out of things to prioritize and has to think about it without that buffer.

Nines makes him angry, and he's relieved.)

He never thought he necessarily had personal beef with anyone on his old team, regardless of how things looked from the other end, how things ended, but that goes ahead and flies out the window, too.

Which are a lot of very fancy words to preclude Finn finally bodily launching himself at one of what are basically walking, talking bad tumblr opinions, but I don't take 9 days to show up to a party without bringing a little tl;dr. Catch Finn crying on the living room floor next month when ghost Slip shows up I guess.

What matters right now is, it definitely looks kind of dumb to try to beat up an incorporeal creature, and there's almost definitely a big mean wild animal planning to investigate the sound of incorporeal creatures not getting beat up. Poe stans a disaster and a legend. ]

[volitaunt]

[ Disaster Legend is just how Star Wars do, lbr.

Poe straggles to a halt as Finn throws himself at Nines, wanting to help and not sure how. It's not like Finn makes any headway when it comes to actually fighting these things. There's a lot of thrashing and flailing and spectral taunting without a great deal of actual punching.

It would be funny, if Poe felt remotely like laughing. If he didn't hurt for Finn and hurt for Paige and hurt for every whispering voice he can hear in the woods around them.

Traitor to his own cause, one of them says. Murderer of his own people. So obsessed with the enemy's blood that he didn't stop to think about spilling the blood of friends and allies. They believed in him, they trusted him-- ]

Stop! Stop it! Go to hell! Fuck yourselves. [ He almost covers his ears, but he doesn't think that would make a difference. It's too weak a gesture, too much like giving in. The longer this goes on the angrier he gets--it's a defense, the same one he fell behind in the wake of losing so many of his fighters and nearly losing Leia. Anger is safe, even if he knows that's not the place he needs to make decisions from any more. He knows he has to do better, for Leia's sake, for everyone's sake-- ]

But you can't do it, can you? Paige, her voice softer, almost gentle. You can't be the person the Resistance needs. And it's too late for you to try.

Finn! We need to get back to camp. All right? We need to walk away. We need to stop this for ourselves if they won't.

[bythehand]

[ Poe goes on to make some reasonable, well-founded suggestions. Sort of aligned with the very real futility of trying to tackle a ghost, take off his helmet, and punch him in the face for-- several reasons, really.

For being this. For making it sound like any of it was just that easy, like Finn was waiting for any chance to have a good time shooting people when he knows exactly what they're coming out of. For talking about Slip like he ever gave him half a thought before. And Finn yells something like some way to die at him, and realistically this is kind of a mess. Across the board. Everyone is yelling stuff. Finn doesn't keep thrashing in an undignified manner at an incorporeal jerk after a certain point. Not so much because he doesn't want to. More because it's not getting him anywhere. He hates that. He sort of thrives on getting somewhere when he does things.

Nines would know better than him about exactly what way to die it is. He died the same way. No name, no family, no friends, no medics, for no good reason. Just got left there. Like a well-labeled and insignificant part that fell off of machinery and not a human person. And if Nines hadn't gotten the upper hand on him, Finn would have been the one to do it, and that's another one of those things that he doesn't like thinking about.

And it's worth noting that Poe is raising reasonable good points and making smart suggestions right now, because Finn is very much trending towards the "what if I just fly right at the metaphorical cannon all over again" line of thought. What if he ignores Poe's logic, and chases ghosts around in the forest all day instead of stopping to deal with his issues or getting back to goal one, the mission he's here for.

Only one of them can hold the Responsible Ball at any given point in time, and Finn has very bravely decided to put his finger on his nose Not-It style regarding that. ]

I'm not gonna say I'm a fan of that plan right now!

[ Finn when I throw a big boar or whatever into this chaotic party in my next tag: Regrettable.

Fear leads to anger, anger leads to hate, hate leads to almost getting owned by dangerous moon animals because you want to yell at a fake ghost. ]

i. guilt is what we aim for

[shootsoff]

[This place is nasty.

Honestly? He'd had enough of this crap in the Chamber of All, with the whole borrowed memories thing and the weird twisted Escher stairways to everywhere and everywhen. The last thing he wants right now on an already dangerous mission out into the monster-infested woods is the addition of weird ghostly apparitions sliding in and out of the shadows taunting him. And his teammates.

Speaking of teammates, the one thing he's actually happy about is having a team to go out into the wilds with, even if the only one he knows very well is Finn. He knows Finn. He knows Finn will have his back even with all the weird stuff going on. Even if Finn's looking a little rough around the edges himself. Roy can see what Finn's seeing, the emaciated alien figures that seem to slide out of the shadows, looking at Finn with eyes that seem to glow and flicker.

He also notices that Finn doesn't draw his weapon when he sees them.

Moving in a bit closer, he glances at Finn sideways, licks his lips, trying to figure out how to approach this whole thing.]

Those guys with you?

[....what is tact.]

[bythehand]

[ A firm 2% of Finn's brain is thinking something like, maybe he should have never gone in for an exploration team for this. Maybe everyone should have stayed in the tent city handing out supplies. Because there are more than a few days in the running for being the worst in his memory, but he's already well on his way towards putting this one as a top contender.

This one hurts in all the ways he doesn't know how to stop. It's going to the trouble of airing things out that he broadly prefers to just not think about at all, if he can help it. He doesn't much appreciate that. He'd rather have Phasma stroll out of the woods and try to beat him to death with a tree branch.

Some of the aliens duck out of sight when Roy spots them. Not vanishing as much as hiding, shrinking away. And maybe Finn doesn't much care for seeing that all over again, but he can't exactly blame them. ]

No. [ Well. Maybe not where he can leave it, in good conscience. ] Yeah. I mean yeah. They're mine. Technically. They're just not--

[ He swallows. That hurts, too. ]

They weren't with me. Before. Kind of complicated.

[ The last bit, he's pretty sure, might actually be a lie. He could explain it in two sentences, probably, if he really tried. The only complicated part is what led into everything and his own personal emotional landscape.

Calm and collected who? Neither of these men have ever known the term. ]

[shootsoff]

[Roy is mostly able to grin and bear it, because he hasn't seen many apparitions around here, hasn't had to face off much of anything, at least not yet. It's not exactly something he's looking forward to, but right now it's out of sight, out of mind, and he's doing a damn good job of ignoring the sounds of a motorcycle revving in the distance, of Oliver's laugh, the glow behind trees here and there.

Right now, he's more focused on Finn and the things he's seeing in the woods, on Finn's reactions to them. It hurts Finn to see them, that much is obvious, but Roy doesn't really understand why. Doesn't really follow. Finn's explanation doesn't help a lot, either. They're Finn's, but they weren't with him. That it was complicated.

Roy puts a hand on his hip, frowns a little bit, glancing over at the other man, eyes searching his face as if he could figure it out just by looking at him. Doesn't work.

Calm and collected? Yeah, not their thing.]

You know, I'd totally say it's cool and you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to, but...

[A shrug.]

I've known a person or two who'd put off talking about their stuff until it was too late.

[He's avoiding eye contact, though, trying not to push too hard.]

[bythehand]

[ He almost asks what too late looks like. Almost pretends he might be able to lay it out into the pros and cons of explaining everything versus letting it sit the way it's been sitting for almost a year. But the thing is, he's pretty sure he's seen what too late looks like.

What it looks like on Poe, anyway. And as surely as it's different for everyone, Finn is afraid to find out what happens when he personally hits the bottom and starts to drown. He's just never been sure if it scares him more than cracking open the seal on-- in this case-- something he's been making himself avoid for nearly a year now.

Long enough to have moved past the point of thinking anyone he'd trust enough to tell would see him in a worse light after knowing. Long enough to be at the point where he could maybe admit he just doesn't wanna think about it. Sees himself in a worse light after the fact.

Finn looks down. Tries to pull his focus back in, makes a rapid-fire judgement call.

It's not like he can't trust Roy. ]

There's a mining colony back home. Small. In the Outer Rim. [ Is where Finn lands, eventually. The more he tries to think of what he'll say, the more things he considers in terms of needing to be explained for the context, for potential understanding.

He steels his expression, tries to sound more matter of fact than anything; but it's a tremulous thing. Scraped together. Not likely to last. ]

They sent me there for my first deployment.

[ When in doubt, honesty should probably win out. Even vague honesty and a lot of mental fussing over word choice combined. ]

[shootsoff]

[Roy could probably write a novel about what too late looks like - about all the times Jason's demons had crawled out of the woodwork to threaten all three of them, and they'd been caught unawares because Jason had never bothered to actually talk about what was weighing on his mind. That had always sorta driven Roy crazy. Just a little.

As far as Roy's concerned, letting things sit just lets them fester and eat away at all the soft stuff inside a person until they're nothing but a hard, fragile shell. That's the last thing he'd want for Finn, but he's still not going to push too much. And honestly? He pretty much expects the brush-off, just like Jason had always given him. It's not a big deal, it comes with the territory, sometimes it takes a while, a lot of careful effort, to open people up, and Roy's fine with that. He likes Finn enough to put in the effort.

But instead, Finn just puts his head down, avoids eye contact, and actually talks. So Roy shuts his mouth and listens, even as his eyes keep sweeping the perimeter, making sure they're not surrounded, that the sounds aren't real. Finn's voice is contradicting itself, the words matter of fact, the tone a little fragile and uncertain. Roy knows that sound, that feeling, that choice of words. Knows how it feels to say the deep, painful things in that flippant voice, hoping that whoever you're laying out your weakness for isn't going to stomp on it and break your heart.

Glancing back over at Finn, he makes a snap decision that feels as natural as breathing - he's not going to do that. Not gonna judge, not gonna mock, not gonna make light. Finn is his friend, no matter what he says, Roy's gonna have his back. Even if what he did is bad. Even if he killed people.]

You were in the army?

[Roy's tone is neutral, curious and encouraging.]

[bythehand]

[ Finn finds himself weirdly preoccupied with the army. It's weird how it can be so specific and so vague all at once. It's one of those numerous interconnected threads. One thing always leads to another thing. Questions sort of folding into more questions, in that way that happens with people who aren't from the same galaxy. It'll gain momentum, maybe, the further this goes.

That's not too hard to steel himself for. He doesn't mind giving honest answers.

Sometimes it occurs to him how few people really know what he came from, how little he ever wants to tell them. A lot of the time he doesn't think about it. He tries to staunchly ignore the echo of you let it happen. Keeps his gaze determinedly down, doesn't follow any flickers of movement, any sounds of shifting. Doesn't want to see it. ]

I was raised for one.

[ At this point it's better to end up hashing it out than to leave most of it unanswered or assumed. ]

They told us a lot of things that weren't true. About the workers. About everything out there. I could-- I could explain it better later. If you want.

[ That's stalling on the relevant story a little, but it's another truth. ]