[ open ] if we're all just cynics come undone

[dothelokimotion]

who: Loki + You
what: Rescuing + Canon update
when: June 15th + Late June
where: Around!
warnings: Spoilers for Infinity War, violence


[ Loki awakens.

It was startling, like he had forgotten how to breathe and submerged underwater for all his days. His chest heaves, fits of coughing wrestling his voice away from him as the doctors clamor above him, gloved hands resting on his shoulders. Violently, Loki shakes them off, immediately climbing out of bed and fleeing the hospital. Hospital. How had he ended up here? How —

A few blocks away, Loki stops, his back resting against the wall. Trembling, his fingers go upwards, touching his neck and drawing back with a hiss. Loki cannot see them but he can feel it. Dark finger-brands upon his skin, squeezing the life out of him, until he couldn't breathe, he couldn't see Thor, spots dancing in his vision, and thinking I don't want to go, I don't want to go —

He slides against the wall, boneless, leaning his head back. The sky looked so blue. His throat aches.

I could have done it, father! I could have done it. For you! For all of you.

Odin was right all along. Loki never could have done it. ]

[ i. infiltration, open to hostages and infiltrators joining him. ]

[ When Loki learned of the kidnappings and who had been taken, his anger overpowered any lingering feelings of self-loathing and tragedy. It was a task he could throw himself into, even as he constantly doubts any effort made in his part. Doubts the ability in his hands, the power in his bones. He would like nothing more than to squirrel himself away, cut off all ties. He didn't want to try anymore only to fail. He can't do it, he knows that now.

But . . . he found he couldn't stop either. For that, Loki blames Thor and curses him constantly under his breath as he and Jim sneak into the base, under heavy illusions, similar to the ones he has placed around his neck. The wound there was slow healing and even Loki's voice bore the slight twinge of soreness. Thankfully, he is nothing if not an excellent pretender.

Jim shoots a few people down, but Loki swats the men away. Steps on a man's neck as he makes his way through. Once they cleared the area, Loki drops part of the illusion to the hostages, his voice sharp and curt. ]

We're leaving. Can you get up?

[ ii. brawl ]

[ It had been bloody but short. Blissfully short. Loki doesn't join the medics (his healing gifts were mediocre and he is not in the mood to help out the entire community). He should approach his . . . friends. Family. But strength fails him as he stands there, looking hopelessly lost. Loki should be proud, shouldn't he? He managed to help, it didn't fall apart.

He should be proud.

He feels none of these things.

One of the kidnappers (missed by the general chaos) rushes at him, but Loki easily turns and grabs him by the throat. Squeezes. And then lets go with a gasp, colour draining from his face. The kidnapper stumbles back, confused but seeing an opportunity and rushes at Loki again.

Loki who is frozen stiff and cannot move. ]

[ iii. aftermath ]

[ Loki doesn't join the healers (he considers his skills in that area mediocre), but he does stop by a few people, healing them of minor gashes and wounds. He doesn't make eye contact. They come and go, and Loki is oddly mute, no quicksilver lines and retorts passing through his lips. Breath in, breath out. He waves them off. What Loki hasn't realized is the illusion he had placed around his neck was slowly flickering, giving away to Loki's bone-exhaustion. ]

There. Off you go.

[ iv. wildcard ]

[ Loki will be around, killing kidnappers, healing people and sort of drifting here and there, checking up on people. Post-event, you can meet him at Gramarye, in his office or doing a few quiet lectures or around Riverview in general. ]

Comments

iii;

[neversurrender]

[Thanks to the collar dampening the effects of the serum, Steve doesn't walk out of the fight unharmed. Even after having the collar removed there's lingering signs of bruising around his face, and if he were to lift up his shirt, worse bruising, scraps, and cuts would be revealed all across his chest and back. Their kidnappers had been neither careful nor kind.

He walks with a slight limp as he approaches Loki, his feet carrying him to someone familiar rather then the jumble of unfamiliar and already outnumbered healers around them. All he really needs is some patching up. The serum could do the rest.

The silence between them is almost a comfort as Loki works on him. He's not in the mood for retorts or niceties, and for once Loki doesn't seem to be either. But when the illusion begins to fade, he can't help but lift his gaze to Loki's neck, where bruises begin to appear that he hadn't noticed before.

Without thinking, he raises his hand, fingers touching Loki's jaw and gently pushing it to the side, where he can get a better look.]

Did that happen in the fight? Did one of them try to strangle you?

[But no. The finger marks are so large. It couldn't have been any one of the kidnappers.]

You should get that look at.

[dothelokimotion]

[ Loki recoils with a hiss, his expression contorted in fear. He has no space for gentleness, not now, not when his chest burns. But any sharp words die because this is Steve in a way, so Loki bites his tongue harshly. ]

It's fine. It will heal soon enough.

[ Will it? Loki has born the brunt of Thanos before, but nothing this extreme. He doesn't know. He doesn't know anything. ]

[neversurrender]

[Steve's hand drops in response and he eyes Loki warily for a moment. He doesn't miss the fear on the Asgardian's face, but he also doesn't believe it's his place to question it. Whatever happened, it left a mark on Loki that's probably deeper than the bruises to make him react like that.]

Well, if you're trying to avoid notice, I suggest covering it with bandages. Or find a turtle neck. [He offers a weak grin.] Whatever illusion you had going is gone. Exhaustion? I can take it from here if you need to rest.

[He begins pulling his shirt back into place.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ He pales at that, eyes furtively looking around him to see if anyone else noticed. Grabbing a roll of bandages, Loki starts wrapping them around his neck, but he pauses mid-way as the pain brings a wetness to his eyes. ]

I rather not. It would look strange if I departed without notice.

[neversurrender]

Not if you're running on fumes. You can't exactly help anyone if you end up being in need of medical attention yourself.

[And judging by the bruises on his neck, Steve believes he's already reached that point. But he's not going to push.]

[dothelokimotion]

[ That is true and Loki frowns because he can easily see the logic of it. Thor would wonder but he would hunt down Loki later anyway. ]

Fine. With your leave, Captain.

[neversurrender]

[He holds up a hand.]

Don't let me stop you. Thanks for the fix up.

[dothelokimotion]

[ It's always a little awkward, talking to Steve but Loki can't really find it in himself to regret that. So he gives a sharp nod that well illustrates how far Loki has come in terms of manners, especially to people he struggles with before leaving, shadows in his wake. ]