𝚘𝚙𝚎𝚗 ✧ 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 𝚊𝚛𝚎 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝚋𝚞𝚛𝚗𝚒𝚗𝚐 𝚜𝚝𝚊𝚛𝚜

[realists]

who: jyn erso & open!
what: flooding, monsters, flowers, miniatures
when: late march through april
where: around the quarantine
warnings: violence for monster/sparring threads & frighteningly adorable tiny children

---

( and ideas, they flood, they stretch the universe. )

Comments

[realists]

I told you to get away from me but you weren't listening.

[ therefore it was his own fault that he got sick, he should have known better and she told him to go away when she was throwing up, but he'd stayed because he's a nice person and what the hell.

she coughs into her blankets and makes a sad noise. ]

We'll have to burn the blankets.

[evasives]

You were sick. [he says so as if that answers everything. why would he stop taking care of her! even if he was not doing a very good job, because she's not any better and now he's sick too.]

They can probably be cleaned. [he takes a moment of his own to cough. they're more contagious than yawns.] But I took your favorite away the first day to avoid more contamination.

[and she'd been too sick to notice.]

[realists]

[ i love you, jyn thinks but doesn't say, falling into a coughing fit at her own realization. she loves cassian. when the kriffing hell did that happen??? why is she feeling this?? she never asked for this. ]

We'll have to burn the whole apartment.

[ continuing without reacting to her sudden emotional awareness seems like the safest bet here. ]

[evasives]

They already attempted that, remember? [it was what got them living together in the first place, so all in all, a+, cassian can be grateful for one thing about that fire.]

We are not burning our house down, Jyn. Please stop being so dramatic.

[he says this as he continues burying himself deeper into the pillows and blankets with a groan. his head is pounding.]

[realists]

[ our house.

she loves him and she loves their house and she loves his stupid perfect face and she loves everything about him and everything is awful. ugh she wants to throw up again... wait no, that is just being sick. ]

Come here. [ slowly she shifts the blanket away from her lap so he can use it like a pillow. not because she wants him to be closer because she loves him or anything, gross. no because. because. ]

[evasives]

[he has no energy in him to question it or fight it when he would rather use his energy to pathetically worm his way over the couch. he doesn't even think about what she wants: she lifts the blanket up and offers him that spot and he knows it. he's too tired and sick to overthink it, so he brings his cocoon over with him and flops his head down in her lap. gently.]

[they're both already sick, it doesn't matter how close they get now.] I'm using so many blankets.

[what has he become.]

[realists]

You folded like a deck of cards. [ she tsks, pulling her hand free from the blankets to comb her fingers through his hair. ] Pathetic.

[ ALL THAT TIME TEASING HER. ]

You're hot.

[evasives]

[leave him alone jyn erso!!! being sick changes a man.]

[he lets out a sigh that's almost content when she starts carding through his hair, letting his eyes flutter shut. it feels shamefully weak but he also feels too much like garbage to care.]

I have a fever, of course I am hot. But I am still cold too.

[realists]

[ she attempts to squint at her phone to see what time it is and decide if they can take more of the medicine but she can't see and is too tired to stretch out and get it and besides cassian still has the timer on his phone so they'll probably just have to wait it out.

medicine is stupid. ]

You're much less intimidating like this. [ it doesn't seem fair that she's the only one who gets to see him in this state. ]

[evasives]

[medicine is very stupid. he misses bacta patches a lot again, even though they wouldn't be very useful in this. but it's the principle of the thing.]

[he huffs at her.] No one is intimidating when they are sick.

[god she's right though and he hates it. he feels so weak and unguarded and the only thing that makes it okay is that jyn is here, and that she's the only one who sees it.]

[realists]

I could still kick your ass.

[ she could not. she has not reached the turn around point of illness yet, she can barely stand. she does keep sliding her fingers weakly through his hair though. ]

[evasives]

[it is such! a shameful! display of weakness! his brain won't stop blaring that at him. but she's so comfortable and her hand is so nice in his hair and he just wants to lay there. comfort... is nice? jyn comforts him, in ways he hasn't allowed and ways that haven't existed for him in years.]

No you can't. [he is smiling despite the agony of being sick. why is he smiling??]

[realists]

[ jyn thinks about pulling his hair to make a point but then she remembers that her hair hurt yesterday so she refrains out of love and affection. and because she doesn't know if she could make a fist. ]

Yeah I could. I'll do it tomorrow. Schedule it.

[evasives]

[don't pull his hair! he is so comfortable here in her lap, as relaxed as one can be when they're sick out of their minds. he wants to take her hand, but he's also snug too nearly in his blankets.]

I will write you in between puking. Avoid my head, it's pounding.

[realists]

Don't say puking.

[ she'll want to puke. ]

What's the point of this medicine if it doesn't even work.

[ why aren't they magically better with the introduction of medicine, this is garbage. ]

[evasives]

Medicines needs time to work.

[apparently. he doesn't know how to handle being sick, at least the kind of sick he can't ignore, he's too weak to ignore this.]

We can file a complaint if it takes more than a few days to kick in. [can they tho.]

[realists]

[ her hand stops moving, just resting in his hair because she's tired. ]

A few days is too long.

[ they'll be dead in a few days, she's certain. and what a punk ass way to die, from getting sick. how banal and pathetic. she's better than this, they're better than this. they've survived too many impossible odds to go out like this. ]

[evasives]

[he tilts his head just enough to look at her. not because she stopped petting his hair, just because she sounds so sad and whiny and even in this Tired state, he wants to comfort her too.]

We can make tea too. We are going to be fine, Jyn.

[obviously!! this sick is kicking their ass, but they have both been through worse. at least now with this, they are together.]

[realists]

[ her nose crinkles, half annoyed that her weakness was obvious enough that he'd show concern. ]

How do you propose we make tea, Cassian, neither of us can get up.

[ just

pointing that out. ]

[evasives]

[oh no the nose crinkle. how adorable. he thinks about telling her, but he knows it wouldn't go over well.]

Maybe we can pay someone to make it for us.

[ignoring that he doesn't really want anyone else to see him in this state. desperate times call for desperate tea measures??]

[realists]

We'd get them sick.

[ she doesn't want to get any of the, like, four people she allows in the apartment sick. that's mean. she also doesn't want any of those four people to see her like this. ]

I miss Bodhi.

[evasives]

Not if we don't touch them.

[since it seems like it's more touch based a contaminate. the moment she says bodhi though, cassian wriggles his hand free to search for hers. it takes a lot of effort and he's already laying on her, but there's something about holding her hand.]

I miss him too.

[realists]

I never touch anyone, [ she grouses, even as she catches his hand, twisting their fingers together. there's always been something easy about holding his hand and now it makes her feel safe, home. ]

I wish he'd stayed.

[ not that any of them had much of a choice, but nor did they have anything to go back to. bodhi was being returned to death and he definitely didn't belong there. ]

[evasives]

What, do I not count? [she is literally touching him right now! and he is too tired and sick and grouchy to care about watching his words. he'll grab her hand again if she tries to take it away!]

[he squeezes it instead, the only bit of comfort he can muster with his current strength.] So do I. [he pauses, coughs a little.] It makes no sense. We are all displaced.

[realists]

No, you don't.

[ cassian is immune to so many of her generalizations when it comes down to it, but he definitely never counts in "everyone" or "anyone". neither had bodhi, frankly, and neither would baze or chirrut. there is just something about that core group of people that will always render her defenses useless. ]

It's kriffed up. [ her fingers leave his hair briefly to touch her necklace, feeling the etched words under her finger tips. ] Mama would tell us to trust the Force, but the Force is a Hutt's arse.