riverviewlogs | [open & closed prompts]

Entry tags:

[open & closed prompts]

who: Edward Elric & Anyone
what: Catch-all for January/February
when: Probably January 15th-February 15th-ish, but honestly whenever works
where: Locations included in prompts below
warnings: None that I can think of, will add as needed

When Val disappeared after going to investigate the portal, Ed has his theories about what that meant. She wouldn't have gone home without saying goodbye, and she wouldn't have left to go anywhere else without telling him, and there was only one way to go through that portal by accident. Whether she left intentionally or not wasn't the issue, the issue was that she had left without notice and that meant that he had to deal with that reality in the here and now.

Which, for Ed, meant needing some time alone to think. He would have followed after her if he thought the portal would lead him to where she went, but he knew it wasn't as easy as that. If the direction of the portal had changed since she disappeared by the time he got to it, there was nothing to gain by going through. Still, he knew the only way he was going to get a break from everyone was by going away for awhile.

So, that's what he did. Packed up, said his goodbyes to everyone as if he was actually leaving and disappeared the only way he could while still trapped on this moon. By disconnecting his device and hiding out beyond the wall. There were a few places he'd stop during his time absent from living within the city limits, if someone really wanted to find him they probably could. Alternately, if someone was the type to wander around outside of the wall they could also bump into him by chance either when he's not hiding out in a building or by exploring the building he happens to be hiding out in.

By the time the monthly holiday had begun Ed had already disappeared, but it wasn't hard to follow along with what was going on in the city. Does this bring me joy? was hardly a concept he wanted to think about at this point, which only made it all the more appropriate that he wasn't around to deal with things when this tradition occurred. Of course, he couldn't stay away forever, there were obligations to take care of for one thing, he just needed time to clear his head and work out what to do moving forward. If there was one thing Ed was a firm believer in, it was doing what had to be done to keep going.

So, after about a week of solitude, one Edward Elric was back on the roster with a new username, lacking the memories of someone that had been there all along.

[Below will be open and closed prompts from planning with other players. If you'd like to throw your character at one of the more open prompts, feel free! Otherwise, wildcard and toss in your own starter/top level and I'll respond to it. Any plotting can be done over plurk at

Transmutedself, or via PM if you don't have a plurk! Open to discussing TDM and holiday prompts as well.]

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Ed blinks as Alphonse, emboldened by the alcohol, presses forward. He did remember that the Al here was more touchy than the ones in Purgatorium had ever been, but his brother drunk and nuzzling his nose against his own was unusual even by Riverview standards as far as he could remember. "I'm not going anywhere, Al."

Not again, certainly not if this is what his disappearance had cost. He shifts, moving to put some distance between them carefully, golden eyes seeking out his brothers once there was enough space there to meet them. "Have you been drinking the whole time I've been gone?" Ed doesn't know how long he's been gone, hasn't gone through all the finer details of his notes yet, but he knew it was February and the last thing he remembered was August. Any length of time between now and then that had passed could have built up to this. "You should have a glass of water, you don't want to get a hangover."

"Not the whoooole time," Al whines, pouting at his brother. And even if he had been, what difference would it make, he thinks. After all, Ed drinks and Al is certainly old enough by now to drink as well. Sure, he's a bit of a light-weight, but he'd wanted something to dull the pain of loneliness and had found it in a bottle.

Not that he needed it anymore, with his brother back. But Al is relishing the freedom he feels at the moment, the warmth of his brother's body being close and the ability to reach out and touch him. He does so now, fingers trailing clumsily through Ed's bangs as he hiccups. Swaying forward, he nuzzles against Ed's throat again, still plucking at his brother's shirt.

Later, when he's sober, he'll feel embarrassed and mortified. But for now, Alphonse is flying high,

"I don't want any water. I want to be with Brother," he murmurs, lashes lowering. "You're back and I don't want to ever leave your side again."

Ed wasn't such a casual drinker at this point to see it that way, he barely had Jay's influence this early in his stay at Riverview and if anything he'd grown prone to pushing away Greed's offers in Purg enough to dislike drinking more than anything. If not for the memory canister he wouldn't have been drinking much at all in October, but he didn't know Al had witnessed that - and Alphonse likely didn't know how different his stance was without those years in Germany. "How long has it been? The last thing I remember it was August, when did I leave?" Finding out he'd only been gone a week would certainly calm the concern of just how long Alphonse had been drinking, a week was nothing compared to the months that he was missing.

Al's touchy, and drunk, and Ed knew how alcohol worked - had seen it enough times working at the bar and the casino over the years - so he knew it was almost to be expected. Which means he doesn't immediately question or stop Al's clingy behavior. Clearly his brother was upset, and his disappearance had been the cause.

"You can have water and be with me, you know." He pointed out, frowning slightly but trying not to look too worried. "C'mon Al, let me get you a glass of water."

"August?" Alphonse repeats, leaning hard against his brother. Even with the alcohol in his system, he could tell something was wrong with that. It had been October when Val had arrived and before that, he'd admitted his feelings for Ed. If Ed forgot everything since August, that meant he'd forgotten all of that. Realizing this, Al suddenly feels nauseous. He pushes away from Ed and stumbles towards the counter, a hand covering his mouth.

Ed doesn't know. His brother doesn't remember their kiss or any of that.

The urge to vomit is strong and Al has to make it to the sink quickly. When he gets there, the contents of his stomach are expelled as he retches. Once he's finished, he wipes his mouth with the back of his sleeve and then turns to Ed again.

"You don't remember all that?" he whispers brokenly, eyes going dim. "Not even when you and I..."

"Yeah, August-" Ed just barely represses the urge to stop his brother when he pushes away, only realizing belatedly that he was about to be sick. His expression twists with concern as he approaches when Alphonse bends over the sink, but Al's throwing up and wiping his face on his sleeve before Edward even has a moment to react.

He shakes his head at the question, trying to understand - to follow where Al's going with his words. "These places don't make a lot of sense, Al. We can't always predict what .... time we're going to come from." Ed knew from experience that it was hard to reconcile with those differences when they came, but it was part of living in places like this and they'd just have to get used to it.

"When you and I what, Al?"

Alphonse doesn't know what's worse. That Ed had left to follow a woman Al barely knew or that he's returned without remembering the kiss they shared. Neither make the sensation in his stomach feel any better and neither are helping to stop the room from spinning. If anything, he feels worse because all the strife and hardships they've shared don't seem to compare to how the last couple months have felt. And now none of it even matters. Where's the equivalent exchange in that? How is any of this fair?

Of course, he knows life isn't fair and equivalent exchange doesn't always work, but he feels as though he and Ed will never have a moment's peace with everything the worlds throw at them.

His eyes remain dim as he looks up at his brother. Just how much memories has he lost? And what exactly does Ed remember? Clutching at his brother, he ducks his head and pulls Ed close. Fear strikes him. Should he admit the truth? Should he tell Ed? What if that just ruins things between them all over again?

"Do you love me, Brother?" he asks, fingers wrinkling the cloth of Ed's shirt as he grips tight. "Do you love me?"

Edited 2018-02-19 04:26 (UTC)

There was no way for Ed to know what Al was thinking, no way for him explain that he'd left for Al even if he would at this point. He hadn't because it felt important that Alphonse not know the truth, that his disappearance was for his brother's sake. That he left to fix things so he could focus on being here with his brother and not caught up in the what-ifs of Val's disappearance. It's a good thing Edward doesn't know what Al is thinking, because he probably wouldn't take too kindly to the thought that everything they suffered was dimmed in comparison to the last few months in his eyes, not with all the lives lost and pain they went through over those years.

He frowns as Al clings to him with the question, resting a hand on his shoulder reassuringly, but knowing there was something more going on that he was not aware of. It was a given in his mind, no question whether or not he loved Alphonse but the way his brother is asking makes him wonder what he'd done to cause Al to doubt it. Did they have a fight he didn't know about?

"Of course I do, Al." Simple, straight forward. No reason for him to think anything of answering that question, even if they didn't say it all that much - or ever, unprompted. Alphonse was drunk and concerned, and he wanted to do what he could to make his brother feel better. "Don't be ridiculous, why wouldn't I?"

Edited 2018-02-19 13:58 (UTC)

Alphonse knows practically instinctively that how Ed loves him isn't how he wants to be loved, but there's nothing he can do about it. He doesn't want to risk admitting how he feels when it might ruin things again and he doesn't want his feelings to show. Of course, relaying this to his heart is a bit difficult when he's drunk, so he leans against his brother, wrapping his arms around his neck. It's an intimate hold, but part of Al doesn't even care anymore. Not when he's missed his brother, his warmth, and the feel of his body against his own.

Eventually, though, the message from his brain reaches his heart and he sighs. Ducking his head, he presses it against his brother's shoulder and shakes it slightly. Squeezing Ed, he swallows. This might not be quite what he wants, but at least he has Ed with him. He can't bare the thought of losing him again.

"That's all I needed to know," he whispers.

Edward can tell there's something going on that he's unaware of, Alphonse is drunk and clingy and not making a whole lot of sense - but if there's one thing Ed is good at it's pushing something aside until he absolutely has to deal with it. Whatever was on Al's mind could wait, there was no sense stressing him out further when he was clearly already this upset and this drunk. There was, admittedly a part of Ed that didn't want to know, feared the reason behind his brother's behavior. When you and I... could easily have referred to some fight they had, but what could they have fought about that would make his brother doubt him like this? Hadn't they already established the trust between them after lab 5?

He lifts a hand to Al's hair when the younger ducks against his shoulder, hoping to reassure him because none of this was making any sense. "Are you sure you're all right?" Al had declined the offer to get water, but Ed still didn't think that was a good idea. The way he's speaking now is unsettling and Ed feels guilt grip at his chest, a sharp pain at the whispered words.

"Come on, Al... You know I'd do anything for you." Maybe not the best thing to say considering the circumstances, but what did Ed know? He just wanted to reassure his brother and he doesn't know how else to do it, not when Al's reacting like this to his return. "If you're not going to let me get you some water at least come sit down."

Ed says he'd do anything for him, but all Al can think of is having a bed to himself for months while a woman shared hers with Ed. He knows it's a selfish way of thinking, but he also knows that Ed has boundaries. He doesn't even realize that Ed had willingly wiped his memories for him. And though they might be willing to die for each other, but there are still things Ed won't do for Al, regardless of how much Al might want it. And it seems that romantic love is not in the cards Ed currently holds.

But these thoughts are severely muddled. They're too complex to navigate in his current state, so Al merely nods and allows himself to be led to a place to sit. As he settles down, he slumps over and reaches for Ed.

He would do anything for his brother, anything, which is why he'd tried to make the relationship work in the first place. Sure, originally he'd thought it could work but as time progressed and it became apparent that they were just not on the same page Edward had continued with it regardless in hopes that it would make Al happy. There's only so much lying to oneself a person can do before it starts eating away at them though and rather than talk to Alphonse about it, Ed had buried his concerns as if they would just go away, being ignored hard enough. Val's arrival only brought everything to the surface because of Al's jealousy, but there was only so much Ed could do in that position to juggle the needs of both of them and if she hadn't shown up it was entirely possible that Ed would have maintained that downward spiral in an attempt to make Alphonse happy until something else happened instead.

There was no way for him to tell Al that he'd done what he'd had to for them, so they could get a fresh start. He was no good for his brother trapped in an endless cycle of guilt and worrying and that's where they'd be if he remembered the situation with Valeria or how things had gone with Alphonse. Sure he'd left a note, a hint for Alphonse to know that his priority had been his brother the whole time but Ed no longer even remembered that much.

Alphonse doesn't say anything so that leaves him a loss with how to deal with this, moving them to the couch to sit down and settling in beside his brother when Al reaches for him. "You can't keep drinking like this, you know." He still has no idea how long it had been going on, or if his brother had any intention of continuing, but the worry is etched pretty clearly in his features as he watches him. The tone more concern than reprimand as he shifts an arm around the younger carefully.

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