riverviewlogs | An aching in my head

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An aching in my head

who: Rey, Finn, Poe, ~~Kyle~~ Ren, and ~~whoever else wants parts of the drama of the wars in our stars.~~ open!
what: Rey gets sick and finds herself taken to the hospital.
when: 12/26--12/29
where: Hospital
warnings: None for now--will update as needed

For a few weeks Rey hadn't been getting enough sleep. It started off with wild dreams that made it difficult to get a night's rest. The dreams gave way to nightmares; sometimes she dreamed she was still on Jakku, waiting for her parents with hunger gnawing at her stomach only to fall into the belly of an abandon ship, break her wrists and die a painful death. Sometimes, she dreamed of Poe and Finn, of being unable to help them as the First Order crushed the Resistance. Sometimes, she relived the very vision that told her to take her first steps. Whatever the dreams were, she woke up with a start and unable to go back to sleep.

Not sleeping was something she was used to. If she wore herself out enough, she could pass out from exhaustion and have a dreamless sleep--something she would prefer at this point. Like anything else in her life, she didn't complain, only pushed herself through the situation thinking she could handle it. Then her world started to change. First it was the weather, changing from a crisp coolness to icy cold. It had silly of Rey to go out without the proper attire in the beginning, but she learned to bundle up, but it wasn't enough. Kylo Ren then appeared and Rey found herself stressed over that--trying to find a way to protect her friends from a man she didn't believe was truly a monster...

The stress of that, combined with worrying over Poe being in the hospital didn't do well to help get any sleep.

Over the past few days she had developed a slight cough, believing it was maybe the coldness in the air that her lungs weren't used to. She didn't think much of it, continuing to go about her duties within the Perimeter Guard and other obligations. If she just pushed through it, she would be okay. Rey failed to realize how bad she was getting. When she had gone to bed the night before, she opted to sleep on the couch, curled up with a blanket. At least she made progress from sleeping on the floor to the couch.

When Poe went to go wake her up, her skin appeared clammy with a faint redness to her cheeks. She wasn't responding no matter how loud he called her name, or nudged her. Finn touched her forehead and felt how hot she was, and before the trio knew it, they were at the hospital. The doctors and nurses were quick to put Rey in a bed, and administer fluids. Different questions were asked: if either of them had noticed a change in her behavior, if she was eating and if so what.

In the end, it was the decision of the doctors that Rey stay in the hospital until she was better. Years of malnutrition had made it harder for her body to stay warm, making her more susceptible to the cold, and a weakened immune system. The hospital staff would have to keep her on a diet to help her body absorb the proper nutrients and help combat the influenza she had.

By the time Rey wakes up from the ordeal, she feels weak and feels a pricking sensation in her right arm. Now it's time for her to recover...and she won't be too thrilled about it.

Best of luck whoever decides to check in on her, she probably won't be in the best of moods and may or may not try to get out of bed.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

A volunteer...that's new. Rey didn't think the hospital had anyone who would purposefully come into this place to volunteer to be near other sick patients. Granted, she didn't think she was contagious, or at least that's what the doctors had surmised. But, he was here more or less, to make sure she didn't try to escape. A guard without the official title of one...

Great.

The less you argue with the medics, the faster you'll get out. Isn't that what Finn had said? Cooperate, show she wasn't so stubborn and perhaps the nurses and doctors would release her early due to...good behavior? This was a hospital, not a prison, but they were one in the same in her mind.

"No..you can stay...just not used to waking up and seeing someone at my bed side." She was used to being alone, but that had changed when she started to sleep in Poe's room with Poe and Finn. There was always someone around, and she got used to having company. Now though, she didn't realize how much she missed it.

"...and for the record, I do remain in my bed." She just tried to take out her IV line twice...maybe three times.

Pierce slowly folded his paper and tucked it under his arm as if he were simply waiting to be urged to be on his way. He would have no problem with that, but it seemed that he was given leave to remain where he was seated by her bedside a moment later. He did not unfold his crossword puzzle though, but he did fold his hands neatly in his lap like an old wise patriarch.

"As in, you are used to living alone and no one checks on you?" She wasn't wholly too young to be living alone, of course. He found it a tad bit odd, if only because he considered that an answer like that had an interesting story behind it. Now was not the time to inquire too deeply unless she was willing to start the ball rolling.

"You are considered a flight risk," he replied bluntly. "You don't adhere to the medical staff's attempts to help you." He smiled again, waving a hand slightly. "I'm sure you have good reasons for it."

"Yes. I've lived on my own for..." She has to pause to think about it, how many times she left those marks on the walls of the AT-AT Walker. "For a very long time." Yes, that more or less sums it up without giving away too much.

She's looking at him with a wary eye, unsure of him, but tolerating his presence. In a way, he almost reminds her of Han. His age, and how he carries himself--different than Han, but...maybe Han would've checked up on her. It's...a pleasant thought. It also makes her wonder how Han would've reacted if he were still alive.

To his blunt reply, she rolled her eyes.

"I only did that once." Well..once while Poe and Finn were in the room, and then maybe a second time.

"I thought they had kidnapped me. One moment, I'm at home and the next I'm here."

Ah, that might explain something of her reaction to him. He had met a few young people - and even children - that had been left to their own devices for a long time. That's where some of her look came from, he expected. He wasn't about to ask for further details as it was besides the point of his being here. It simply allowed him to change tracks a little to understand where she was coming from.

"Well, I apologize for startling you, but if you need any explanation as to why I'm here, you only have to ask," he replied, nodding his head in respect for her. That's how the game worked; let her call the shots in her own 'home'.

"I imagine that was quite frightening, in a strange place with strange people and clearly having been poked and prodded," he replied. The IV was necessary though, given her state of dehydration he had been told. "How are you feeling?"

"..Thanks.." The apology was one she wasn't expecting, but she accepted it nonetheless. Not that she would out right say she forgave him. He was still a stranger, someone she didn't trust at all. He had done nothing to really earn it.

"Usually questions are asked after someone's been shot at." So she lived in a world where there was violence. Shoot first, ask questions later, and left out on her own at a young age. A strong woman who probably was lonely, and if he brought up family...that would be her weak spot.

There was a shrug of her shoulders, finding it easy to talk to him. Or maybe she was that lonely she was willing to talk to anyone. If he weren't around, it would be pretty boring.

"It wasn't frightening so much as...figuring out where I was and finding a way out. If you freak out, if you panic, then you're lose focus and more than likely die." A harsh truth, but at least she wasn't blind to it.

"...better? I'm not coughing as much...and I feel like I have energy."

Pierce raised his eyebrow at that statement, and it was greatly telling. It reminded him of certain areas of the world, namely Bogota where the drug trade ran most people's lives in some way. It painted a picture of her life, and he leaned back with more comfort in his chair, his hands still folded together as he watched her. He nodded his head with understanding as well.

"You've had to do everything you can to survive. That's all there is. Flourishing is for people at the top of the pile," he reflected conversationally and with understanding. He tipped his chin as if he respected for more for it as well. "Did you others that you could at least trust, or were you always having to watch your back?"

Her background was where he had made many of his best choices of candidates for HYDRA. Young people with nothing but the will and cunning to survive, but he wondered if she had to spine to straighten and take what could be hers. Time would tell; she might be someone to keep an eye on for longer than a visitation.

"As long as you are feeling more yourself," he said kindly. "And once you are back to full health again, what shall you do?"

"...exactly." the word was whispered under her breath. It seemed like someone actually understood what she had gone through without giving away too much. Someone that didn't offer an 'I'm sorry,' or an apologetic look. Having sympathy, and empathy was nice but...until someone lived through what she did, having someone understand her was a rare thing. The only people who managed to do that were Dany...and Ren.

"More of the latter than the former. Some people were kind, the others..not so much. But, you learned from your mistakes, and you were lucky if you didn't die from them." Dying from battle or from starvation. Or the heat. Any number of ways, really.

She leaned further back into her pillow, getting a little bit more comfortable. Her left hand went near the IV line but only to scratch around the tape that held it down.

"Go back to work and make sure my friends stay out of trouble..more or less the usual."

He offered only a nod of approval to her whispered word; he hadn't actually heard it but had instead read her lips. Individuals who grew up hard often weren't looking for hand-outs (though they would take them he was certain), but they were looked for understanding that their suffering was recognized as a notch on their belts as a testament of their tenacity and cunning to navigate the world that was theirs. No one could take away that experience after all. It simply was.

"I'm sure that some kindness came with a price," he reflected softly. Expectations. You-owe-me. Nothing in life was ever free. "Clearly, you've managed to survive, which speaks of great skill and inner strength as well as a fair bit of luck until you had experience that hardened you."

He turned more towards her, angling himself to face her rather than sit alongside her, and it was done very specifically by him. Like she had earned some of his respect. Like she had earned his attention the more she spoke. He kept his hands folded in his lap and his paper still tucked under his arms, but his attention was far more focused on her directly.

"And what sort of trouble do your friends seem to find themselves in, hmm? I hope they aren't relishing that trouble-making ability while you are laid up in bed," he said, mirth crinkling the skin around his eyes.

"Sometimes, yes. Sometimes it was telling a joke, or finding something to trade, and sometimes..it was just talking." But nothing was ever free. Nothing was ever given without a price. It's...interesting to be on this line of conversation. Had this kind looking old man been through the same crap as her? She looked down at her hands, processing what he was saying. Had the experience hardened her?

"I wouldn't say hardened, but it made me who I am." A smart, resourceful, clever and talented young woman who didn't take shit from any new scavenger. When she looked up again, she saw he had repositioned his chair to face her further. She was able to see more of him and his body language changed....interesting.

"No, they wouldn't go looking for trouble...." More like trouble, Ren, found them.

"They're my best friends...and I know they can take care of themselves, but I don't want anything to happen to them. A bit silly but..." When you've grown up with nothing, anything you have--clothes, weapons, friends, you'll hold onto tightly.

Not the worst requirements when it came to owing someone something, he imagined. He had heard some real horror stories; he had seen more than a few himself during his tenure as Ambassador. He wasn't going to shy away from the realities of where he and his family was staying after all; everyone needed to understand how the world worked for those if the other classes.

"Trust me, being tough-as-nails and independent is an undervalued skill where I am from," he murmured. Few knew hardship like those on their own. "Some of the best men and women that I knew lived their lives in the worst situations. They were, generally, the most honest and forthright as well. Also an undervalued skill, I might add."

He smiled and nodded his head again, understanding. "When you grow up with nothing, you always value what you gather together for yourself." He gestured at her with a hand. "Please, tell me about your friends. They sound like special people."

There were some nights where Rey had heard of people offering other services in order to make it through the next day. Really, scavengers were slaves in all but in name. They had to work to get their food and it was someone else who determined how much or how little they got to eat.

Rey tilted her head at the older man. So he knew what hardship was. He knew of the pain, either experienced it himself or...he had people on the ground who did.

"What did you do before? Were you..." She regards him again, looking him over carefully. "Were you a commander of a military group?"

As for her friends, there's the briefest of smiles.

"One of them is a pilot and the other..." How did she go about describing Finn?

"He's kind, and when we first met, I hit him with my staff."

Alexander sat for her scrutiny, waiting to see if she would make any connection that was even close to the truth of who he was and what he had done in his life. He might have had some gun callouses on his hands, but they were not as they had once been. He wasn't a grizzled soldier, but he liked to think he could crush one if it came to combat.

"I worked for my government building relations with other countries in the world and placing countermeasures to protect the people from threats," he replied. It was as simple as he could make it without dressing it up as a giant spy agency that took risks and necessary violence to ensure that certain human behaviours slowly came into being. "Long, long ago, I was part of the military, but I did so to serve my country."

A pilot and a nice guy clubbed with a staff? So few details to really go on, but he didn't entirely need much. Nurses could be convinced to talk. "So with our current track record of you being suspicious of my initially presence, there is a chance we might reach friendly terms." It was a joke.

Rey stayed quiet, her eyebrows knitting together in concentration as she listened to his history. It was...impressive in a way. He was part of a government that wanted to help people. Something close to what the Resistance was doing, but...not quite. Although, there was something nagging at her that there might be more to his story. However, she wasn't going to pry. For all she knew, the nagging feeling was from whatever medicine they were giving her.

"...So were you a pilot then? Gunner?" That part she has no trouble asking because she was curious. Poe was part of the military and he was a pilot. And if Alexander were a pilot, then that would be pretty interesting.

The joke didn't go over her head, rather it was enough to make her let out a soft huff.

"Maybe. As long as no one's shooting at us, and you steal something of mine, we should be on good terms."

"A gunner would be more accurate, though I do know how to pilot small personal aircraft," he replied simply. He didn't talk much of his military service; it had been short and certainly not glorious, but it had set him on the path to becoming the man that he was today as well. "I served on the ground with many others. Is there much to the military where you are from?"

Ah, there was a brief noise of amusement. That was good. Amusement was the gateway to greater things, or at least easier conversations. To him, it meant she had let her guard down just a bit.

"Well, I don't think anyone can guarantee the first, and I can assure you that, anything I take will be given willingly or at least with proper payment." And he certainly had no priority at this point to request anything of her. This was all about simple conversation and feeling out the people of this place.

"We should celebrate our new standing on good terms," he reached back and picked up her glass of water. "Water? It's really all we have, though perhaps I can convince juice out of the nurses."

"Oh? What kind of aircraft?" Now that piqued her interest. It was easier to talk about ships and machines than it was to talk about her own feelings. Rey had always been fascinated by them. There was a sense of freedom whenever one was flying through the air or through space.

"On Jakku? No, for the rest of the Galaxy...kind of." Did she say galaxy? Yes, yes she did. "Planetary travel is very possible from where I come from." Best to get that out of the way now so he can ask his questions and she can answer them to the best of her abilities. And no use in bringing up the First Order or the Resistance...that would make her stress out a little.

Another soft laugh, appreciating some of his humor. No one could ever guarantee they wouldn't be shot at, but he was trying at least.

"Thank you...for understanding that." Most people wouldn't and simply tell her that she didn't owe anything which made her feel so weird.

She reached out and took the water from him, peering down at it again.

"No, I don't want anymore hospital food if I can help it." Translation, water was the only good thing here. Rey took a few sips, thinking she could only do that, but her body craved more of it and simply downed the cup. When she was finished, she attempted to try and put the cup back where it was...damn table, it was too far.

"Small crop-dusters mostly, though my family owns a few Cessnas, which are small prop-propeller planes," he said jovially. "Nothing like what anything with intergalactic travel can do, of course." It wasn't the first time that he had heard of such travel after all, and humanity wasn't quite at that kind of technology, though they were learning from the invasion of New York. "Helicopters were also a good choice, though not nearly as much of a pleasure to fly in my opinion."

He had no doubt that she could talk around him when it came to the mechanics of flight and the technology that would allow it to go through the cosmos itself. Her enthusiasm on the subject was obvious. "Do tell me what it's like to travel through whole galaxies and on different planets. I am most curious, even though those are the things of the best science fiction novels where I'm from."

Being shot at seemed to be a fact of life for most people, so he wasn't about to discount the possibility, especially here in this place. The fact he hadn't been shot yet was telling in his opinion. It would be so easy to nip a problem in the bud with a bullet after all.

Ah yes, hospital food, one of the best reasons to feel better and leave. He reached out when she tried to put the empty glass back and took it from her to set down. He was in a better position to do so after all. "I still recommend the Jell-O. No one manages to screw that up too badly."

Rey was trying to make sense of the different ships Alexander was talking about. She imagined something small, but even small aircraft could vary in terms of technology. It was hard to imagine, maybe she could look for something similar here, just to get an idea. Maybe in a holonovel or a actual text.

"It's...." How can one describe it? The feeling of taking off, of going at lightspeed? The sound of the engines as they roared to life, or the adrenaline that flows through you when you're trying to fix a problem on a ship?

"Freeing. There's no other feeling like it. You can feel like you could go anywhere. I've only been to two other planets, one of them was Takodana. It was beautiful, so much green and life."

As for the Jell-O part, it took Rey a moment to figure out what he meant.

"You mean the colorful, wiggly thing?" She asked, just to make sure she understood correctly. There were so many differences between her world and this one.

"It's still bland. It doesn't have much of a taste to it."

He could see that she didn't entirely understand his description, so he pulled down his paper from his arm and began to draw a simple picture of a single-prop plane and then of a helicopter. There was no doubt in his mind that their technology was vastly different, that his own world's happened to be further behind than many places. The idea of whole world travel was very interesting for him. Humanity was quickly ruining their planet after all; he wanted to know what others were like. He held out his pictures for her to look at.

Of course, he was taken with her description, though he felt much the same way with simple flight. "I imagine that the stakes are a bit higher when having to make repairs when traveling at lightspeed? And where would you like to go if you could go anywhere?"

Well, it was supposed to be bland as it was easy on the stomach. "It's mostly gelatin and water, so bland is par for the course. They don't want to upset your stomach, but I find that it's always entertaining and always edible."

Rey sat up a little bit more, watching Alexander draw the different ships he was used to using. How...strange. It was so simple, basic. Just wings and an engine, though for the helicopter, it was several blades that caused lift. She was clearly taken with the drawings, her mind as fuzzy as it was, tried to piece together how those ships would work. They probably had a simple computer, no droid or anything with AI. Briefly, she thought to ask Tony when she was out of here, if these were the same types of ships he had back in his world.

"They are a bit high, yes. Imagine going at lightspeed and then finding that one of the engines to your ship can't handle the stress. One of the other parts, the compressor can't handle the strain either, and if you don't fix it, you and your friends could be killed and pieces of you would be scattered to different start systems." That was one of the more stressful situations Rey had ever been placed in, but she learned to bypass the compressor and she and Han kept them from being killed in the middle of hyper space.

"I would..." where would she go? She only had the Resistance...and family she didn't know what happened to them. "I don't know."

A simple answer. For someone who had the capability to go anywhere they wanted to, she didn't have a clue to which world she would want to explore or make a home on.

There was a faint roll of her eyes. "My stomach is fine. I was brought in because of a...cold." Never mind the malnutrition part, and that her body needed the proper nutrients in order to help her get better.

She seemed to know her way around an intergalactic traveling ship, so that was a useful skill. It meant she was also probably good at repairing machinery, also a very useful skill, especially around these parts. He definitely would find the time to query her about such travel in more depth, if only for interests sake to know more about it. It also might be a good subject to keep her talking.

"I suppose at that point, as your ship comes apart at lightspeed, one probably dies rather quickly and thus doesn't suffer to consider the implications of it all," he remarked a tad dryly. It sounded like quite the way to go, quick and fancy and by that point, one wouldn't care much of their fate anyway. Dead was dead, nothing more than a memory at most.

"Is that part of the reason you're here then?" In Riverview he meant. "I must admit that this place is quite the adventure and has plenty of opportunities to endeavor upon."

He raised an eyebrow at the clear showing of youthful antics. It had been quite some time since someone had rolled their eyes at him. "Yes, I don't suppose that your immune system was at all compromised by the clear signs of malnutrition that you suffer from."

"I was able to fix it, by passed the compressor and everything was back on track. No threats of dying in space because the junkyard of a ship wasn't working. We were safe for the moment." No, they didn't die out in space, but that was always the risk. If the Falcon would hold together, or if they were being followed. At least they didn't have to worry about flying into Hut space and dealing with them.

"No? I don't think it is. I think it's a mistake to why I was brought here." Again, she nearly says, but keeps that part to herself. She doesn't know Alexander, and would play things close to the chest. He didn't need to know the finer details of her life...

Or at least she thought he didn't until he pointed out that she was malnourished. Rey wasn't embarrassed by her background, the life she lead on Jakku. But to have something like that, a weakness, be broadcast like that..it made her feel embarrassed. One wasn't supposed to let those things get to them, but she slumped a little in her bed.

"I am suffering, I am eating and eating far more than when I was on Jakku." She was getting on the defensive, wanting to make it clear that she was eating. She had been eating...just not the right things she should be eating.

"Its like you're quite adept at fixing problems under pressure. That's a very valuable skill," he murmured. It was also a skill that he made a mental note of. With him being so new to this place, he was certainly looking for people of value all over the place and there was no point in discounting age. She also had entertaining stories beyond the notion that she was useful.

He considered the idea that being brought to this place was a mistake, and yet here she was, which meant that something was off about the statement. He watched her for a moment, simply nodding his head as if accepting everything that she was saying as fact. "Why would you consider it a mistake?"

Pierce offered a sympathetic look. "Malnutrition like yours - if I'm seeing the signs correctly - were life-long while on this planet you speak of. It's going to take time, but the effects will likely follow you through life. You're doing your part now, which is good."

"Have to be," Rey murmured softly. She had to be adept at fixing things under pressure, if she wanted to eat. From what Alexander has seen of Rey, and what she's told him, it's more than clear that she hasn't had an easy life. It made her who she was today. Though, her past did haunt her in a way. Not being able to eat properly has harmed her, and she failed to see it until she was sick.

"Because I need to be elsewhere. My friends and I are needed back home." No need to talk about a war, or how it's lasted for dozens of years.

"It wasn't always like that. I was..taken care of prior to being on Jakku." So that had to count for something right? She didn't know what hunger was until being dropped off on Jakku. Or at least that's what she remembers, but memories were funny things. They could be viewed differently depending on how bad or good they were. Not to mention, the passage of time does tend to make memories seem different than they were before.

"I won't let anything like this happen again. I can't afford for it to happen again." She'l bundle up next time. Take better care of herself, do anything else that was required of her.

"And you believe your cause back home is more important than the cause here," he asked, folding one leg over the other comfortably as he settled more into his chair. Her difficult life was a story of millions, not unheard but certainly one to be sympathetic to. It also made many of them useful and ingenious, also very valuable aspects to them. "Or is the cause here just one you aren't familiar enough to invest yourself in?"

He raised an eyebrow, as if to ask 'well, which is it'. A difficult life or a not-so difficult one. He thought that she was bringing this up as a cover for the fact that she had lived much of her developing life malnourished and likely fighting for every scrap of food that she ate. How much of her life had been learning to fix things and how much had been in possible serve of vile males where she lived?

"If I may inquire, how old were you when you began living on this Jakku? I only ask because times of the most growth are childhood and teenage years, and if malnutrition is present in those years, they will have life-long effects," he said with a tone of sympathetic understanding. She didn't look older than very young twenties at most, which made him think she had been malnourished in those prime years.

He nodded, certain that she would be determined in this now. "And if you do fall ill, it is best to take care of it right away than allowing it to linger. Lots of rest, plenty of soup, and a good book is what my wife would say."

"My cause back home is more important." There was a biting edge to her words. There wasn't a doubt in her mind that her mission, the battle in her home world was more important than what was going on here in Riverview. If the First Order won out against the Resistance, then the galaxy was in danger...and if they could figure out how to travel between one dimension to another..not even this place would be safe.

Rey had to think for a moment, recalling those years when she was on Jakku. How she watched the shuttle craft fly off in the distance with her parents, without her.

"I was...six maybe seven." Possibly eight, but it didn't matter. She did have enough to eat on some days and that...that was going to haunt her for the rest of her life. Her hands clenched the covers, upset at the circumstance but silently vowing to overcome it. She would still fight. She would still push forward. This wouldn't hold her back.

"I didn't even realize I was ill. I thought I was just tired, and my lungs weren't used to the cold."

An aching in my head

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