riverviewlogs | [closed] habeas felicitatem in die natus es

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[closed] habeas felicitatem in die natus es

who: Adam and Ronan
what: Adam surprises Ronan with a house
when: 10/25
where: Their new home
warnings: ~~Will probably get steamy.~~ Currently steamy. NSFW.

Adam never thought much about birthdays or celebrations, but this technically also doubled as their anniversary. The realization inspired him to make Ronan's birthday better than the last, which would hopefully be easy considering Ronan's mother wouldn't die again and Adam wouldn't almost kill him this year. He wanted to help Ronan avoid the melancholy of those memories, so he spent most of the month preparing.

He'd been saving up since he arrived, and with Ronan's half of the money, he managed to find them a small home out of the city. It seemed like an old fixer-upper, but it had a garage that could fit two cars and Ronan seemed to like that sort of thing anyway.

The furniture ended up a bit eclectic thanks to Adam's lack of experience in interior design. He bought what seemed most practical for the money, anything that didn't look too cheap, and furnished their house with the bare minimum. He knew Ronan would dream up the rest for them.

He spent most of his time installing shelves and cabinets to prepare for the various useless objects Ronan would dream up, and spent the last week making things seem homey. He had no real experience in that, but he'd been been around the Barns to know what Ronan liked.

Once Ronan's birthday hit, it was finally livable. The backyard was a bit of a mess, overgrown and unused. Adam wasn't sure if Ronan would want to start up a farm while he was already working at one, so he left their options open. Still, Adam felt proud of his work and excited to live in his very own house.

It was hard to contain that excitement, and he caved the night before Ronan's birthday. He convinced himself it would be better to show him now so they could celebrate all day tomorrow. So when they met up for dinner, Adam pretended to give Ronan directions to a restaurant, keeping it up until they arrived at a quiet, unlit home with nothing else around it.

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Ronan resisted, trying to stay on top until he realized what Adam was going for. Then he relented, rolling onto his side. He wrapped his arms around Adam's waist and coiled one of his legs around Adam's to keep him close.

He had yet to register on an intellectual level or really, any level that wasn't physical, what they were about to do. But he was aware that they needed something else, if only because of how uncomfortable it was for Adam to press inside him. Unless that was normal.

"I think we're missing something." Ronan didn't elaborate what or allow Adam a chance to respond. He kissed him again and moved his hips against him.

Adam grunted in frustration when Ronan kissed him again, but he kept it going for a few long moments before pulling back. "I know," he replied, irritated that Ronan believed he didn't know what he was doing. He had books, after all.

He leaned forward again to bite at Ronan's lip, fingers continuing to tease him until his other hand reached the nightstand. He had planned for this, of course, because that was what Adam did.

He brought out a small bottle of lube, one that had been passed out for free at a festival, and pulled away from Ronan to open it and concentrate. He was rubbing it between his fingers when he realized he should ask.

"Are you... sure? You could do it to me or we could just... something else. Doesn't matter."

Ronan knew better. There was no excuse. He knew that Adam would have planned every aspect of this, any way it could and would go. And yet he was still surprised. The shock was enough to snap him out of his haze.

It was stupid to hesitate about this. God knew that they'd-- no, he needed to leave Him out of this. Ronan knew that they'd done about everything else but this. It shouldn't matter, but the fact remained that it was the most intimate act, in Ronan's mind, that they could do. He'd been told it was wrong in so many ways and still he wanted it. For once, Adam's hands weren't enough.

Oh, he wanted them. Teasing him open, around his cock, but he wanted more. And he was glad this was with Adam and he knew how Ronan needed it.

His silent struggle resolved, he finally responded. "Yeah, I'm sure. I can do it to you later."

Adam didn't mind the hesitation. It allowed him to think about what he was doing, breathe and steady himself. His knees shook slightly between Ronan's legs, and by the time he felt sturdy, Ronan replied.

Or maybe it was Ronan's agreement that grounded him. Adam gave him a lopsided, easy smile, full of anticipation. "Okay," he agreed, his clean hand running along Ronan's thigh, "Tell me if you wanna do something else."

They weren't used to careful, slow touches or open communication, but that was really the only thing that would work here. He took Ronan's cock into his lubed hand, fingers working around the whole of his length until his strokes were smooth and even.

He moved downward then, cupping Ronan's balls and stroking along his perineum. Nervous, he coated his fingers with more lube and then circled his index around Ronan's hole.

He reminded himself that it would be easiest with Ronan relaxed, and his clean hand went to Ronan's cock, pumping him the way he knew Ronan liked best.

All it took was Adam's hand around his cock for Ronan to decide that he would never want to do anything else. He reached blindly for Adam, desperate to touch any part of him. He had to remind himself that those hands were exactly where he wanted them and didn't need to be guided anywhere.

He tensed when Adam teased his entrance. At some point, that was supposed to feel good. He assumed. But at the moment he had to force himself to think of something else. Fortunately, Adam was always one step ahead of him. As he stroked his cock, Ronan parted his thighs wider before snaking one leg up around Adam's waist. He hoped that would give Adam better access to anything he cared to or needed to touch, but really he just needed to move. He hated staying still as much as he hated the space between them.

Adam was patient and waited for Ronan to relax and spread his legs a little wider before he pressed the tip of his finger inside him. His breath caught, getting used to the feeling of that tight heat and trying not to get ahead of himself when he thought about what that would be like around him.

He exhaled a shaky breath and carefully slid the rest of the way in, then looked up for Ronan's reaction. His thrusts started slow, then gradually matched the rhythm of the hand on Ronan's cock.

Ronan's first instinct was to close to his eyes, but when he watched Adam, he was transfixed. Any thoughts he had about how uncomfortable this was were soon replaced. The new ones centered around Adam's hands moving over and in him. When Adam looked up at him to gauge his reaction, Ronan reminded himself that he was no matter how he felt, he wasn't ready to have Adam's cock inside him.

Patience. He hated it. But when Adam thrust his finger inside him, he started to change his mind. Not at once-- it still felt too strange at first. Then he felt he pleasure building in slow waves.

"Fuck." He grabbed at Adam's shoulder. He tried to still his hips but the kept rocking up into the hand around his cock and then back to try and thrust Adam's finger in deeper.

Adam leaned in closer so Ronan could hold onto him, turning his head to kiss his wrist. He was trying to keep this slow and sweet, at least until he felt Ronan pushing back against his fingers.

"Oh," he said without meaning to, face going red. It was hard to express why the thought of Ronan desperately fucking himself on Adam's fingers was so arousing, so he didn't try to. Instead, he started meeting Ronan's thrusts, allowing him to set the pace.

Then he pressed his second finger in, letting Ronan adjust before scissoring them with each movement. It wasn't long before he impatiently added a third, hooking his fingers each time he pulled them almost-entirely out to make Ronan really feel it.

"Say when," he requested. He was already breathing hard and his pupils were blown wide with lust, but he tried to remain practical. "And―condoms, in the drawer."

At first, Ronan fought to keep his breath even. It didn't take long to abandon that effort. Panting, trying and failing to bite back a groan, he moved faster and clutched harder at Adam and the sheets he'd just gripped with one hand.

He forgot there was a point to this beyond having Adam fuck him with his hands until Adam spoke. For a long moment, he could do nothing more than stare. Then his brow furrowed and his hips stilled.

"Why do we need condoms?" Ronan didn't mean for it to come out as harsh as that, but his voice was already breathless. He couldn't help the slight rasp. Still, he couldn't blame it all on that.

He thought that this was the first time Adam had done this. He thought it was just him-- so why would they need a condom? Was it someone Adam had dated before? He couldn't think that Ronan would cheat on him and Ronan knew Adam wouldn't do that to him.

Adam didn't notice anything was wrong until Ronan stopped moving. He thought he'd hurt him somehow, bent his fingers in the wrong way, so he also stilled and looked up in concern.

His boyfriend did look upset, but not in pain. He frowned and pulled his fingers out of him, forcing his brain to slow down and think beyond his intense need to be inside Ronan. Why did they need condoms? Mostly, Adam's habit of collecting them from the festivals stemmed from just always thinking condoms were necessary.

The books he read gave him a bit more insight, and he pulled from that. "Because I'm gonna―" He flushed, despite the fact that his fingers were just inside Ronan for this purpose. "It'll get messy and you'll have to... clean up." This was an incredible mood killer.

Ronan hadn't been thinking about the messier aspect of sex, but now that Adam mentioned it, it seemed obvious. It also seemed to be less of a mood killer than any of the other thoughts that had run through his mind.

"Oh, yeah--that-- makes sense." Now he felt like a jerk for even thinking Adam would've lied to him.

He looked at Adam, who seemed even more flustered. Unsure of what to say, he considered grabbing at Adam's hand to urge him back inside, or apologizing. Instead he spent a few moment admiring his flushed face and dark eyes. Then he lowered his gaze to take in the rest of them.

He was done waiting.

"So, yeah. Now is good."

Part of him wondered what Ronan had thought, but most of him just wanted to get back to business. He was glad for the quick break, though, now that he had time to get his pulse back in order.

Then Ronan said now and he was ready to act. He leaned forward to kiss his boyfriend sloppily, murmuring, "I love you," against his lips. How many times would he say that tonight? Probably not enough.

He took the liberty of reaching into the drawer and grabbed a packet. He used his teeth to open it, well aware that the lube on his fingers would make him look like a fool trying to get it open. Once it was on him, he looked at Ronan again and said, "Okay."

Despite Ronan's consent, his movements were still tentative and slow, lifting Ronan's legs and positioning himself, just to give him enough time to say otherwise. But then he was pressing into him, and he needed this to go much faster.

Ronan knew he should focus on staying relaxed while he waited for Adam. He wasn't completely ignorant of how this worked. But it was easier not to be nervous in his dreams. When he woke up, there were not consequences. That Adam wasn't real or going to judge him if everything went sideways. ...Unlike what? This Adam? Ronan remembered, again, how stupid that fear was.

Impatient, he sat up enough to run his hand over Adam's back. He only fell back again once Adam was ready. He let Adam guide him however he needed, then reached for his hands to pull him closer.

When Adam eased into him, he closed his eyes. It didn't exactly hurt, but it was far from the most comfortable feeling in the world. One look at Adam told him he felt the exact opposite, closer to how Ronan thought he should be feeling like now.

Well, fuck that. He wasn't going to let Adam have all the fun. He squeezed Adam's hand, then placed his hand on the back of Adam's head to bring him into a kiss.

"I love you." And with that, he rocked his hips to bring him deeper inside. That message had better be clear. If not, he'd be very disappointed in his boyfriend's ability to reason. How was he going to graduate college if he missed that?

Adam's mind blanked and all he could manage was obeying Ronan's guidance, eagerly returning the kiss. He tangled their tongues together, only breaking apart to hiss when Ronan pushed him deeper inside him.

He pressed their noses together and kept his eyes opened to see Ronan's expression as he bottomed out inside him. Adam didn't think he'd ever felt so good, so full of love and affection, like he was really home. Alien planet or not, he belonged wherever Ronan was.

His free hand wrapped around Ronan's cock once again and started a slow, even pace that he mimicked with his hips. He took Ronan's bottom lip between his teeth, lightly biting down each time he pulled out.

Ronan's breath hitched when Adam started stroking him again and with Adam kissing him, he had trouble catching it again. But he didn't pull away. Instead he buried his fingers in Adam's hair. He rocked his hips to match Adam's pace.

However uncomfortable or awkward he felt before, those feelings were quickly forgotten. Whenever Adam had his hands on him, it didn't take much for Ronan to forget about everything else. All of his focus was on Adam's hand slowly stroking him, Ronan's lips caught between his teeth, the soft, needy sounds he made-- all of that he'd felt before. Having Adam inside him made this an entirely new experience and so much more.

His fingers tightened around Adam's. He broke the kiss, turning his head so he could whisper in his good ear.

"Dine hunc ardorem mentibus addunt, Euryale, an sua cuique deus fit dira cupido?"
Do the gods light this fire in our hearts or does each man's mad desire become his god?

Adam had been nervous before. They'd done plenty with each other, but this had seemed much more delicate to him. He'd researched and thought about it, but none of that came to mind. The only thing that occurred to him was how fun this was.

It felt amazing in general, but the intimacy of it and the way their noises mingled together made him feel so much lighter. The Symposium made sense now, their bodies longing to be unified and only reaching heavenly bliss when together.

Of course, Ronan took it a step farther. He might have laughed, objectively, at the thought of his boyfriend quoting Virgil to him during sex. What really happened was that his heart skipped a beat and he flushed impossibly harder. He didn't think anything could sound better than Ronan cursing during sex until he heard Ronan speaking Latin during sex.

He did not have all of Virgil memorized, and could not call upon anything clever. For Ronan, though, he could manage one of Virgil's more popular quotes.

"Et nos cedamus Amori." Let us, too, yield to love. Taking his own advice, he snapped his hips abruptly to inch deeper inside him and begin a hurried, relentless pace.

It still wasn't enough, and he pressed himself down against Ronan to feel every part of their bodies move together. With Ronan's cock trapped between their stomachs, he moved both hands to his boyfriend's hips, pushing him down to meet every thrust.

Ronan only had the time to smile before Adam thrust harder and Ronan, who hadn't braced himself, slid up the mattress. Caught by surprise, he let out a small cry, then gasped. He pressed his hand to the mattress and dug his fingers in for leverage or at least support to keep himself from sliding any farther. He held onto Adam tightly with his free arm. Nails scraped lightly against skin.

It no longer mattered that Adam had stopped stroking him, he was harder than ever. The pleasure had been building for a while now, but with Adam driving into him almost faster than Ronan could process, it went from a steady crescendo to an abrupt forzando, with the climax yet to come.

He tried to keep some control for a while longer, meeting each of Adam's thrusts now that he'd braced himself. But once it was clear that Adam's hands were enough to keep Ronan steady, he relaxed. He moved his hand away from the bed and reached for Adam. He swept his fingers over Adam's shoulder blade and pressed his face to his neck. His hips rocked against Adam's, as if he needed any help bringing him in deeper.

He might have been swearing. He might have been moaning. He might even have been saying Adam's name over and over. It was more likely that Ronan did all three.

Adam wondered if this could possibly feel as good to Ronan as it did for him, whether anything could match up to the feeling of being inside his boyfriend. As always, Ronan had to be contradictory, making Adam's breath hitch by pushing back into a thrust.

It must have made him black out for a moment because all of Ronan's words were blending together. He responded with a low, "Ronan," against his ear, unable to come up with anything intelligent.

One hand moved up to Ronan's shoulder to trace at the sharp edges that Adam could now see and then all he could think to say was, "Love you," breathlessly over and over. It was no Latin love poetry, but Adam couldn't bring himself to care.

His stuttered thrusts served as the warning he didn't think to give, the sudden burst of his orgasm surprising even him―and this time he really did black out.

Latin or no, Ronan could think of no sweeter words to hear Adam speak. He gripped him tightly and soon his own words mirrored Adam's. "I love you. I love you. I love you" so fast they began to blur and form a chant. A prayer of Ronan's own making, to the man he worshiped. He was not the first to invent it, but for each person it was just as beautiful.

When Adam came, he kept bucking his hips, allowing him to ride him out until he was done. Ronan was still hard and craved Adam's hand around his cock, but he could wait a while longer so Adam could savor his pleasure. He kissed his neck.

"I love you, Adam," he whispered again.

Adam regained consciousness at about the moment that Ronan said he loved him―the most recent time. He grinned, too sated to hold anything back.

It was only when he looked down to pull out that he realized Ronan was still hard. He took him in hand with a firm grip and used long, languid strokes to let his boyfriend get the most out of it.

"Happy birthday," he breathed.

Ronan stopped speaking, now gone to beyond words. It was all he could do to breathe and watch as Adam stroked him to completion. It didn't take long, especially not with Adam staring at him and speaking with such love in his voice... and his hands...

Ronan cupped the back of Adam's head and pulled him in for a kiss. He kept pushing his hips up, encouraging Adam to go faster-- please, God-- and when he found himself so close he couldn't bear it he pulled away from Adam's lips.

"Adam-- fuck," was the only warning he gave. Then he groaned. As much as he wanted to keep looking into Adam's eyes, his own closed as he came, spilling over Adam's hands and across his stomach.

It'd be a mess to clean up but for now he just wanted to sink back against the bed and look at Adam. Just a while longer, he wanted to coast along this wave of pleasure and happiness as long as he could.

The smile he gave Adam was reserved for these moments alone, soft, genuine, and utterly at peace.

"Thanks."

Adam pulled back slowly once Ronan was done, just enough to remove the condom, tie it off, then throw it as close to the waste bin as he could without looking. As soon as that was done, all sense of responsibility left him and he dropped next to Ronan, their sweaty limbs still tangled together.

He took a moment to appreciate the smile Ronan gave him, the blissed-out look in his eyes, and felt like he was the most powerful person in the world for getting Ronan Lynch to look like that. They were sweaty and messy but he cuddled up against his boyfriend anyway, using him as a pillow as he closed his eyes.

"Night, Ronan," he mumbled, making it clear neither of them would be getting out of bed to clean up until morning.

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[closed] habeas felicitatem in die natus es

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