She shakes her head lightly, "My world has yet to discover lightbulbs. We had chandeliers full of candles, oil lanterns and such. Our dances consisted of patterned walks, and we had violins and fortepianos for music, and..." Her voice drops a bit more, "I've never seen a man naked aside from my husband."

It feels so embarrassing to admit it, only partly because of the lingering knowledge of how many ranks she'd lose if anyone back home knew she had any more experience than was absolutely, strictly necessary. And that included sight.

"I died back home. This... feels a bit like that. Embarrassing, and sickening, and..." She hugs her knees a bit closer. "...Every day I lost a little bit more of myself, and I stopped understanding my surroundings. Everything became confusing, and strange, and I forgot my husband's face, and even what humans were meant to look like... And it all came back when I was out there. I suppose I just got. Caught up in the fear."

She's such a mistake. She couldn't even die properly. That's what she's been thinking since the moment she realized this night wasn't going well.