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who: Alex Reagan and hopefully you!
what: An open log. There's a couple open prompts but if they don't work just add your own! And don't worry about styles. I'll match em.
when: The month of August.
where: Anywhere you want her to be that's not the mingle, honestly!
warnings: Not that I can think of at the moment.

I.

Despite everything else in her life, Alex Reagan happened to be someone who was a person of habit, and so where she could be found just happened to be habit as well. So, all too often Alex found herself working at The Coffee Shop rather than her office with the substandard coffee and the annoying interns. She was there almost every day with at least one empty cup in front of her, one full one and some sort of pastries there for anyone who might happen to want to stop by and visit, or for anyone whom she had a lunch date with. The table itself was largely taken up with two books and a notebook, along with her phone from home. She inevitably had one of the books open, even though both of them were on the same lines of things, even if vastly different.

Alex would either be reading from a book on learning Spanish and copying what she was learning into the notebook in small and frantic writing, as if her hand couldn't keep up with her brain, because well... That's basically what happened, even in things like this. Still, she was making a real effort to do it, and the book was deeply into, as Alex was hitting the harder parts of the beginner's section and there were lists of words that went along with it.

The second book is much older and still somehow less well-loved than the first one, and Alex had found it in the back of the library shelves. Despite having taken it out days ago, she was still dealing with the beginning pages of it, and if there was something that was guaranteed that would make her grumble, it was this. But still, she was determined to try and teach herself how to read Cruciform even if it killed her, which at this point it honestly just might do. So when someone came up to her, she was all too ready to sit either of them aside, and greeting the other person with a grin, especially if it was someone who she expected.

ii

The other way in which Alex was a creature of habit came with her walking her dog in the afternoon. Alex's pitbull was large and gray and more than a little friendly, which probably made sense considering Alex Reagan was his owner. Her mornings were normally running and rowing, but afternoon walks were more slow and leisurely and normally made by herself. Well, by herself as well as her playing Pokemon Go, even if no one else was. So, yes, she's walking her dog but she's also got her device out to let her know when there just happens to be a pokemon or two in the area that she's walking in.

Normally she collects one or two, and fights at a gym or so, and then goes about her business and comes home. Not today though. Today, Alex just stopped so suddenly that Apo's leash actually snapped taunt for a moment before the gray dog came back to see her, and Alex is just staring at her phone for a second. The dumbed silence only lasts for a second or two before Alex just yells like the child who she can come times be: "Oh my god! It's a Pikachu! It's a Pikachu!" Then without a preamble other than that, Alex just takes off after it, a giant grin on her face. She's never caught one before.

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Alex's stirring caused him to turn around, frowning heavily at her. She should have been in the bed. She should have been sleeping properly instead of dramatically trying to sleep on a couch, but that, unfortunately, was the ridiculousness that was Alex Reagan. If there was a dramatic, dangerous or annoying way of doing something, she would find it and make sure that she did just that. Richard knew that all too well.

When she stirred and turned to look at him he simply raised a brow. She knew what he was going to say, but, this time, he was going to say it anyway. "You should be sleeping in bed." Not 'I'm sorry', not a word about the fight at all, and if Richard had his way there wouldn't be. Not now or ever.

Without saying anything for a minute, Alex just slipped off the couch to sit next to him on the floor, dragging the blanket he'd covered her over with right along with her and dropping it onto her lap. She was close enough to touch him, but she didn't. Not yet. Instead she just spoke softly but in an entirely matter-of-fact tone, coupling it with a lift of her shoulders into a shrug. "I tried. I couldn't sleep there." Of course she couldn't sleep there, anymore than she expected that he could have done now since the two of them had gotten together.

Or were together, she didn't know yet. Coming home in the middle of the night isn't really a positive answer one way or another in Alex's view. Which was why she pulled her knees up to her chest and dropped her chin onto the top of them, not looking at him when she asked her next question in a soft and hesitant voice. "Are you staying?" That's what she settled on rather than anything else for a second, but before he could respond, Alex just added, "because if you want, I can find an apartment somewhere else, Richard. And I'll take Simon with me of course. He'd want to come anyway." Because of course, he was stalking her and not stalking Richard. That she knew of anyway.

Richard is reasonably sure that Simon isn't stalking him. In fact, he's pretty sure that Simon doesn't like him at all. After all, there's no contact between them, not really. There's something ... disliked about him from Simon; probably because the boy has the ridiculous notion that Richard is going to open the door to usher in a demon apocalypse and that he's dragging Alex along with him. It's insanity, but it makes him persona non grata to the escaped insane asylum murderer who he's harboring in his house.

Alex's positioning is something Richard knows well. Too many late nights when she'd had no sleep and felt vulnerable had given him keen insight into what it meant, even without the words that came next. Instead of answering her question (a completely idiotic question at that), he just gestures to the bed. They both need sleep and, clearly, if he still wants to sleep in the same bed with her that he's not kicking her out. At least that's how it works by his logic.

Alex isn't going to mention her conversation with Simon that she'd had while Richard was gone, and she's not going to mention how angry he seemed at Richard's being Richard, which of course, Alex being Alex, had defended. Besides, this was her fault because she couldn't keep her mouth shut to Rey, and then it was her fault again for handing him her phone. In her defense, she hadn't felt like she'd had anything on it to be ashamed of, but now, clearly she felt differently about that, as much as she hated it.

More than that, Alex couldn't look at him while she awaited the verdict, not really. It was too close to other times when she'd asked questions that she didn't know the answers too or how he'd respond to them. Times like when he'd arrived, and times like when she'd asked him to run away with her rather than Geneva, and then again that time last week when she asked what happened to them now. Catching the gesture out of the corner of her eye, Alex just frowned even as she moved into a standing position. In some ways it was comforting that this was going to be like their other fights where they just didn't talk about it.

In other ways it was just entirely maddening because of course they weren't going to talk about it. So, Alex didn't say anything either as she just grabbed the blanket and moved to crawl into her side of the bed where she had clearly tried to sleep from the way that the sheets were bunched up. More than that, his pillow is firmly half on her side at Alex hugging height, which probably wasn't a surprise since she was wearing his shirt and a crimson blush because honestly, she didn't expect him to come home in the middle of the night. If he came home at all.

Richard changed, climbing into bed next to her, frowning slightly before rolling onto his side. There was a part of him that wanted to talk to her about it, but that part also knew that the possibility that it would turn into another fight was just as high as if they didn't. Alex was defensive and Richard was still sore from being handed the blame for her actions. There wasn't much either of them could do about that. Instead, he chose to pull her close, resting his chin against her shoulder.

Still, something had to be said, because she had brought another person into the fight and he had told him about Coralee ... sort of. Something he thought Alex already had. "You sent Jeff." Was wasn't an accusation, more a conversation starter than anything else. A conversation which he felt would be better served with his arms around her so her mind couldn't wander to him leaving her forever. Something he doubted he could ever actually do.

Alex just waited while he changed, and while he was doing so, she moved his pillow to the proper place on his side of the bed, because the less said about it, in Alex's opinion, the better. And then she just watched him for a minute before he pulled her close and she let out a soft sigh of relief and closed her eyes for a minute. Her arms were tight around his neck, because she had missed him even if she didn't need to say it, or couldn't say it for all of the reasons that he didn't want to talk about their fight. She didn't want to cause another one when he was finally back and everything else felt so precarious. This fighting as a couple thing was even more terrible than when they fought on the show, and if someone had asked her if she ever imagined that it would be, she would have denied it.

After of course denying the fact that the two of them would ever actually be a couple, despite everything else.

The accusation about Jeff was met with a soft sigh. "Of course I did. I know you, Richard, and I know that you shouldn't be alone when you were like how you were that night. I also know that if I went it would have just made things a hundred times worse." She just frowned at him in the low light of their room, for a minute, before reaching out and touching his cheek. It was hard to admit that she would have made things worse, but Alex knew that she would have. And there was also the other piece of her that felt a bit like a coward for not going herself, but she knew that if she did then the two of them probably would have been done. Her armor had barely held up to a parting shot (hadn't held up at all to that parting shot, actually) and there's no way she could have handled a full on Richard Strand with his PhD in weaponized words at his full Dr. Richard Strand glory. She knew it. And she knew that there were some things that he could have said to her that never could have been taken back.

And of course, he wasn't the only one who could do that, Alex could have too even if she didn't want to do it. After all, her temper tended to feed on his, and this would have been a terrible, terrible feast. But she does ask: "did it help?"

For a moment, Richard doesn't say anything. Simply leaning into the touch that, if he were honest with himself, he'd missed more than he ever thought he could.

The question itself was tricky, and she was right to not have gone. It would have just erupted into another fight that neither of them would have been able to recover from. Jeff, however, he'd been, helpful in his own way. He'd listened and understood, but that wasn't something Richard was ready to admit just yet. It was more a thought that needed to be buried deep into the catacombs of Richard's memory. Instead, he focused on other aspects of the conversation.

"I thought you'd told him about Coralee." Which, he realized seemed odd to be brought up in a conversation about Alex and him, but it had been. He'd brought it up as a comparison, after all, and he expected her to tell him what she'd said to others about the past, so, of course, he ought to do the same.

When he moved into her touch, Alex just leaned forward and rested her forehead against his own for a moment with her eyes closed. She'd missed him, honestly, and she missed this, and she was just going to let it comfort her and hope that it was comforting him in return as she did it. Maybe that was one good thing about not talking about their fight, or at least not talking about their fight directly: it meant that they could just jump to the whole comfort thing, which was infinitely more important than the make up sex that he'd made fun of her about before.

Perhaps surprisingly, there was no sharp intake of breath when he mentioned Coralee, and Alex didn't move away from him or even open her eyes at that. Instead, she just spoke softly. "I wouldn't have done that. Especially not right then." Because the two of them had already been fighting about what she'd deemed as 'her big mouth' to Jeff. "I just told him that we'd had a huge fight, the biggest one we've ever had maybe, and that it was about me not keeping my big mouth shut but other than that... I just figured it was probably best if I let you tell him whatever it was that you wanted to about it. "

Because Alex was still under the impression that's what the fight was about: her telling people about the past. Which was why she did pull back just slightly and opened her eyes to watch him before she added, "Rey won't be contacting you again. I made certain of it."

He lets out a soft puff of air at the affirmation that Rey won't be contacting him. He's not so sure about that, but he is sure that Alex did what she thought she could to prevent it.

"I mean before. You'd, said you told him everything." Which, he assumed meant that Richard was married and Coralee was his estranged wife. That she'd been missing for twenty years and that her disappearance had been the reason Richard had agreed to do the show at all. Well, that and what he'd stated to her when they first began.

"I told him that Warren had your missing and presumed dead wife, I think." Alex just frowned for a moment. "I'm pretty sure of it, actually. But also just given where we were and why were talking about our stories..." And actual fucking demons because yeah, fucking demons all around, even if Richard didn't believe in them. "I can't remember if I mentioned her name or not though."

Alex was frustrated with her own lack of memory for the context, honestly. "I'm sorry. Sleep deprivation is never really good for my memory." Which was sort of an understatement, especially given how all of the hostages had been kept awake in order to better add to the brainwashing. "But I did tell him about her in some way, I'm pretty sure. It's possible that he just didn't remember. He was opening up a lot too that day."

He was quiet for a few moments as he mulled over what she'd said. He'd assumed that, if it had come up, there had been more to it. Alex had a self-proclaimed, big mouth, after all. But it hadn't, which meant that, to an extent, he'd told Jeff something that wasn't at all something the other man would know. That was, irritating. Jeff didn't need to know about any of it, and yet, now he did.

He brushed some strands of hair out of her face, still frowning. "He knows about her now." There's no more explanation, no why or when (although the when is pretty obvious). Just a simple statement that he feels should say everything.

Alex couldn't help but smile when he brushed the hair from her face, because his touch comforted her more often than not, and she'd missed it in the days that he'd been gone. And of course had been worried that it wouldn't ever happen again, so she was just going to allow herself to luxuriate into it for a moment. But then her expression turned to a frown to match his own when he admitted that Jeff knew about her now. It was something else to feel guilty over, even if it hadn't been her who had directly done it. No, she hadn't spilled all of the details, but she'd done enough to lay the framework for it.

"I'm sorry, Richard." Her voice was soft, and it was a sigh, because she was sorry for it. Telling stories, no telling their story (because it wasn't just his anymore, and it hadn't been since he'd come to Seattle holding his peace offering of the Black Tape that lead them down the road to the Unsound and the Mysterium and everything that had come with it.) was something that had been second nature to her for years, and she hadn't been lying when she'd told him before that it had become her life. Now, she didn't quite know what to do with the fact that she really needed to keep so much of it off limits. It was harder than she wanted to admit that it was.

"I do promise that I'm going to try to do better with it. A lot better." There was a fierce little vow in those words, and she leaned over and made it official by just giving him the smallest of kisses on his forehead with it. "I honestly don't want you to be in that position again. I never did."

He brushed more hair over her ear and pulled back enough to look at her face. Richard knew her feelings in regards to Rey, more than knew how she would feel when he pointed out what the other woman had done. The fact that the option had been there for Rey to weaponize the past had been the catalyst for the fight, but it had blown into far more than it had started as. Still, Richard didn't want to dwell on the past; he didn't want others to dwell on his past either.

And yet, Jeff knowing felt safe. The other man had demons in his past and seemed to understand what shouldn't be said and done with certain knowledge. Not that he would ever tell either Jeff or Alex that.

"It's, fine." It came out more as if he had still been mulling it over. He had been, after all. But it was right. Jeff was fine; he wouldn't do the same and, against Richard's attempts, he trusted the man. "Jeff knowing is fine." It was permission in its own way. Alex could tell Jeff anything she wanted and Richard had promised not to get angry about it. She needed at least one outlet to tell everything that had happened to; even if that everything involved his estranged wife and the belief that Richard was going to bring about the end of days.

Alex knew what he was doing of course. Richard was giving her permission to talk to Jeff. That permission really only meant one thing to her honestly, and that was that Richard trusted Jeff. Jeff was brilliant and fantastic and a good friend and someone who was already very like herself, so she wasn't at all surprised that Jeff had earned that trust perhaps even sooner than Alex herself had. (Of course, Jeff had the advantage in that Alex had already came in and broken down so many of the walls that he'd placed as barriers so that he didn't trust other people before that.)

But because he trusted Jeff, Alex also knew that she wasn't going to be talking to Jeff about this. At least, not if she could possibly avoid it. Richard needed to trust someone who wasn't her, and he needed someone who he felt save enough complaining about her to. (Not that he'd ever made a habit of not complaining about her to herself anyway.) So, she wasn't going to do anything that she felt might jeaporidize the friendship between the two men.

Oh, that didn't mean that Alex wasn't going to be Jeff's friend by any means (it was pretty hard to get rid of Alex as a friend when it all came down to it anyway) but she could also be his friend without running to him with concerns that Alex had about Richard, or without mentioning the whole demons and taking over the world thing. It's harder than she wants to admit to stop doing that, but Alex was persistent as hell, and she was going to try.

So, in the end, Alex just smiled at him and nodded before kissing him gently. "Okay." There, she accepted the permission even if she wasn't going to do it.

Richard continued to caress her hair, brushing the stray pieces that fell into her face as he watched her, eyes searching hers for a long moment. She wasn't going to talk to Jeff. Even if her words had said okay, her eyes betrayed the truth, that was her choice to make, not his.

She looked tired, and he knew she was. Alex had already admitted that she hadn't been sleeping since he left. After all, sleeping on that couch was an impossible act unless you had exhausted yourself to the point of it. Besides, he knew she had issues sleeping without him there. He just couldn't bring himself to come back before tonight.

"You should get some sleep." Real sleep, not barely sleeping while holding the dog.

Alex Reagan could often be an open book in her expressions and there were times (when Alex was thinking about him in a particularly romantic way) that she thought that she might be Richard Strand's favorite book in that way. (Not that she was ever going to mention it of course.) So she knew that he would read that determination in her face.

Glad that he wasn't going to question it, Alex just gave him a little relieved smile. She didn't want to explain why she wasn't going to do it and knowing him he probably already knew. He knew her well after all and he definitely knew about her sleep problems that sometimes even happened on the nights he was there. (Of course he also knew just how to put her to sleep so it helped.)

Right now she just nodded and held him a little tighter before she just whispered as an answer. "I'm glad you're home, my Richard." Because they both knew that would help her sleep immensely. And of course for a thousand reasons that were more important to her than that.

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