"Leia, you told me we would handle him together. This isn't together." He looks from her to Rey and then back. "Was this ever going to be a discussion? Or was it the two of you deciding how things should go for all of us, with the expectation that we'd just fall in line? The two of you are making a choice for everyone here, not just me and Finn. The Admiral, Paige, Cassian and Jyn too."
He's not treading the line any more. He's striding over it. It makes him feel sick, to be so firmly entrenched in opposition to his General's choice. "I told you I was with you. I thought you were with us."
Then, to Rey: "I already told you the first time you asked. Don't do this. Forget the question of whether or not he can turn you, what if he kills you? If this doesn't work it's not going to just... go away. Be fine. General, you know that. What we do has consequences. That's..." He falters. "That's what you've been trying to get me to see."
He's been thinking about that a lot, since talking to Holdo and to John. When to act. Why. What he can prevent, what he can do to help others survive.
BB-8 makes another worried noise, rolling over to rest near Poe's ankles. He resists the urge to comfort himself with a pat to the droid's head dome, instead moving his leg so his ankle presses against the curve of BB-8's side. Poe shakes his head, speaking to Rey again. "This isn't just your training we're talking about. This is--we're not desperate, here! We're not running, we're not out of time! We don't have to act in desperation!"
Poe's voice climbs again. "Why would he change here when he hasn't before now?!"
He feels a little bit like he's going crazy. How can they both be for this? How can they get upset that he and Finn aren't?
How can Leia look him in the eye and say she knows better than anyone what Kylo Ren is capable of?
"He tortured me." It's the first time he's said it out loud. The first time. Leia knew the report. With Finn, it was understood. Cassian guessed, though it wasn't hard. Rey... knew that he'd has his mind violated, but how could she understand, really, when she'd had the means to fight back? And he hadn't told her what happened before that moment. He hadn't told her about what the First Order did to him at Kylo Ren's behest.
He's never said it out loud, to a room full of people, and it leaves him feeling spent and alone. Vulnerable to pity. He wants to walk away from this entire conversation before that possibility can manifest. He can't.
no subject
He's not treading the line any more. He's striding over it. It makes him feel sick, to be so firmly entrenched in opposition to his General's choice. "I told you I was with you. I thought you were with us."
Then, to Rey: "I already told you the first time you asked. Don't do this. Forget the question of whether or not he can turn you, what if he kills you? If this doesn't work it's not going to just... go away. Be fine. General, you know that. What we do has consequences. That's..." He falters. "That's what you've been trying to get me to see."
He's been thinking about that a lot, since talking to Holdo and to John. When to act. Why. What he can prevent, what he can do to help others survive.
BB-8 makes another worried noise, rolling over to rest near Poe's ankles. He resists the urge to comfort himself with a pat to the droid's head dome, instead moving his leg so his ankle presses against the curve of BB-8's side. Poe shakes his head, speaking to Rey again. "This isn't just your training we're talking about. This is--we're not desperate, here! We're not running, we're not out of time! We don't have to act in desperation!"
Poe's voice climbs again. "Why would he change here when he hasn't before now?!"
He feels a little bit like he's going crazy. How can they both be for this? How can they get upset that he and Finn aren't?
How can Leia look him in the eye and say she knows better than anyone what Kylo Ren is capable of?
"He tortured me." It's the first time he's said it out loud. The first time. Leia knew the report. With Finn, it was understood. Cassian guessed, though it wasn't hard. Rey... knew that he'd has his mind violated, but how could she understand, really, when she'd had the means to fight back? And he hadn't told her what happened before that moment. He hadn't told her about what the First Order did to him at Kylo Ren's behest.
He's never said it out loud, to a room full of people, and it leaves him feeling spent and alone. Vulnerable to pity. He wants to walk away from this entire conversation before that possibility can manifest. He can't.